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Post by loboticialtree on Aug 10, 2023 19:56:16 GMT -5
Ok, finally, K will do 22. I wanna see if he fails Stage 1 like the All-Stars did in real life SASUKE 22
After a resurgence in SASUKE 21, where every competing All-Star did better than they did in SASUKE 20, 35 year old Kōji Yamada and his fellow All-Stars have high hopes for SASUKE 22, expecting that this might be the time one of them breaks through and becomes the third to hit the button on the Final Stage's tower. Of course, [removed during the final draft because KojiFan's an idiot and didn't think about spoilers] but nonetheless, nobody knows that yet, it's just the current tournament they're thinking of. Yamada ends up getting #91 (don't look at me, the numbers made no sense this tournament) and is placed right before Takeda again, and the two are seen talking during the intro. K: You ever tried something like that [Slider Jump]? T: No, that's new to me. I guess the closest thing is the Pipe Slider. K: Ah, well, I apologise in advance then, I'll see you after your bath. Takeda gives Kōji a playful little punch on the arm, stating that he only cleared the easiest version, then the two share a laugh and go back to their fellow All-Stars as Tomoharu Shōji gets ready to start SASUKE 22 off with a bang. Well, I guess it was more of a splash, but eh... First StageThere have been shocks in SASUKE, yeah, results that weren't exactly on everyone's mind, such as Shingo Yamamoto's fail in [insert any tournament except the first three], Akiyama in 6 and 9, and more recently, Nagano in 19. Still, nobody could've predicted the pure lunacy of the First Stage so far. Of the 90 runners so far, only five have cleared, and while that's a good amount for this era of the show so far, the strange part is who occupies those five spots in the winner's circle. The first two clears came from SASUKE Trials qualifiers, and just one clearing was, at the time, completely unprecedented, so to see two clear? It caught everyone off guard. Taiwanese rock climber Lee En-Chih followed with a clear three runs after the latter of the STQers, and elder statesmen Yoshiyuki Okuyama and Hiromichi Satō cleared to round it out so far. And that's it. No All-Stars, no pro athletes unless one counts Lee as a pro athlete, just a gymnast, shoe salesman, rock climber, former sprinter (side note, does anyone know what Okuyama actually did as a job during his SASUKE career?) and TV celebrity. Needless to say, this has been a strange tournament. Yamada looks to get the All-Stars on the board and avenge Yamamoto, Akiyama and Katsumi, and he steps up to the start line as a VTR of his previous Shin-SASUKE fails plays along with his theme in the background. The viewers are reminded of the All-Stars' resurgence and how the three strongest ones are yet to run, then the camera cuts back to Yamada receiving advice from the three who have fallen by the wayside. Soon after, he is introduced by announcer Wataru Ogasawara and the starting beeps sound. Yamada charges into the course, starting with an old friend, the Rokudantobi. With a few quick strides, Yamada crosses the obstacle like he's done so many times in the past, and then prepares to face a new area, the Circle Hammer. It wasn't necessarily a bad second obstacle per se, it just didn't take out or do damage to anyone with potential, but- Ah, who cares. Let's be real here, this stuff I'm writing right now is filler, and you don't even realise it. You're just reading it cause I might have something funny to say, because I know you don't care about the Circle Hammer either. Guess what? Nothing funny. I've just made you read 75 and counting words (if one counts 75 as a word) for nothing. You silly goose. Now let's get back to the action. Well, would you look at that, in the time it took me to write all that filler, Yamada cleared the Circle Hammer and Log Grip! Cool, less writing for me! Now, next up however, is an obstacle that's far more than filler, one that if executed properly, could still be a force to be reckoned with even today. It is none other than the one, the only, the Jumping Spider. It's already taken out Katsumi just ten runs ago and would go on to eliminate Takeda right after Yamada's run, along with a few other notable competitors such as... Err... Well, okay, it did damage in the past and future okay? Geez, cut me some slack here... Anyway, it's a tense moment as Yamada runs up, takes a leap, and... He sticks it. Being a veteran of the Spider Walk, Yamada has no problems with that section of the obstacle, and is able to dismount safely to face the Half-Pipe Attack. Hello. This is YourResidentKojiFan's editor speaking. In order to save you all the memory of what happened on this obstacle earlier this tournament, I'm making the executive decision to delete the parts of this paragraph that mention it. Apologies if this makes the paragraph look strange, I'm doing what I think is best. Thank you.
The All-Stars watch on nervously, as this obstacle has already taken out many strong competitors, including Akiyama and [REDACTED]. It shouldn't be an issue for someone who works with ropes to save lives, you wouldn't think, but as we saw earlier, [REDACTED]. Sure enough, Yamada is easily able to grab the rope, but perhaps shaken by [REDACTED], he takes two swings to make sure he's safe. He lands on the pad, and thankfully avoids [REDACTED] before going up to face the Warped Wall for the 15th time. I told you it'd make the paragraph look strange. With about 50 seconds to go and the stringent time limit today, Yamada must make it up the wall in one go if he wants to have any shot at clearing, and thankfully, he does, scaling the 5.2 meter beast like a mere ladder. Now, he must face the new obstacle today, the Slider Jump. Sort of a Jump Hang/Stick Slider hybrid, this obstacle took out veteran and former Last Man Standing Levi Meeuwenberg already, and would later take out Nagano in perhaps the biggest shock of Shin-SASUKE. Yamada grabs hold of the bar with the overhand grip, takes a second before sliding down the track, then once he gets to the end, he reaches out... And then, the sound of despair in SASUKE, the loud splash of a competitor falling, is heard. Yamada's left hand missed the cargo net and his right couldn't hold him up, sending the fireman plummeting for the exact bath he playfully teased Takeda about. There's no jokes here now, Yamada is heartbroken, head in his hands, as he climbs out of the water and dries off. As we know, Takeda and Nagano would fail after, marking the first time ever that no All-Star made it out of Stage 1. Even Yamada couldn't save that from happening this time. AftermathNobody would end up clearing after Yamada, leaving only five to take on the Second Stage, which, well, I can just tell you it only took out Hiromichi and that's all you need to know. The Third Stage however, had an iconic moment, when shoe salesman and former unknown Yuuji Urushihara broke through and became the first person in 5 tournaments and approximately 900 days to reach the Final Stage. He would end up being the only one to do so, and would end up falling mere centimeters short, but as we all know, he wasn't done. Turns out, neither was Yamada, nor the rest of the All-Stars. Well, except Shiratori, but y'know... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you ever feel useless, just know that you aren't the Swing Ladder.I think his job was as a Sports Instructor, at least according to his SASUKE 27 profile?
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Post by SasukeBanzukeNo1 (Moon12) on Aug 11, 2023 1:28:45 GMT -5
I hope this thread isn't dead just yet, but I was wondering how Kōji would do in SASUKE 25—with a revamped first stage (most obstacles he has already faced and conquered, but others not yet), as well as the second and third stages if he's able to reach them.
Of course there is still SASUKE 24 that you wanted to do, so if you wanna get that out of the way first, go right ahead. I'm just really curious about his SASUKE 25 performance.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Aug 11, 2023 9:09:14 GMT -5
I hope this thread isn't dead just yet, but I was wondering how Kōji would do in SASUKE 25—with a revamped first stage (most obstacles he has already faced and conquered, but others not yet), as well as the second and third stages if he's able to reach them. Of course there is still SASUKE 24 that you wanted to do, so if you wanna get that out of the way first, go right ahead. I'm just really curious about his SASUKE 25 performance. Don't worry, it's not dead. I still really enjoy doing these writings. I'm gonna get 24 done first, but after that, 25 will follow!
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Post by SasukeBanzukeNo1 (Moon12) on Aug 12, 2023 1:25:42 GMT -5
I hope this thread isn't dead just yet, but I was wondering how Kōji would do in SASUKE 25—with a revamped first stage (most obstacles he has already faced and conquered, but others not yet), as well as the second and third stages if he's able to reach them. Of course there is still SASUKE 24 that you wanted to do, so if you wanna get that out of the way first, go right ahead. I'm just really curious about his SASUKE 25 performance. Don't worry, it's not dead. I still really enjoy doing these writings. I'm gonna get 24 done first, but after that, 25 will follow! Sounds good bro, no worries! I really like these as well. It's always a mystery how well he would do the tournaments before his debut and after his retirement.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Aug 21, 2023 13:53:18 GMT -5
I look forward to seeing how our man will do in my 2nd favourite tournament, SASUKE 24. "For me... There is nothing else except SASUKE."
Those immortal words, spoken by a man who many detest, many feel bad for, and many don't know what to think of, run through the bloodstreams of every avid SASUKE fan in the world, whether they know the entire story or not. That quote is joked about, paraphrased, just about everything you can do to a sentence has been done to it.
But at the end of the day, it's what every competitor feels when they walk up to that start line. In that moment, SASUKE is their life, their journey, their death. Nothing else matters when you're on that course. You want one thing, and one thing only. Nobody wants to fail. Nobody wants to see their dream slip away for perhaps the last time. Everyone wants to win. That's no shock. In SASUKE, that goal is very seldomly achieved.
People have lived decades of their lives on a seemingly endless conquest for Kanzenseiha, some have gone farther than others, some have known when to quit, some, well... They try their best, but never get the chance at all. But sometimes... Just sometimes... A certain dog has their day.SASUKE 24It's New Year's Day 2010, and while billions of people around the globe are partying with their friends and family, drinking their beverage of choice, and/or drowning themselves in the false hope that this year will be better than the last one, at Midoriyama, none of that is on peoples' minds. For the 100 competitors that are about to step up to take on the world's toughest obstacle course, as always, they only care about achieving Kanzensei- Oh, hold on, I'm getting a call from my editor. Oookay, it appears we've gotten to the point where 30-40% of the field is just joke competitors or celebrities that are only on SASUKE to revive their dying careers, so, scratch that last point. Still, the SASUKE All-Stars care more than arguably anyone else, and among them is our main man, 36 year old Kōji Yamada. After his and Nagano's Final Stage heartbreaks roughly three months ago, they both know this could be a make or break tournament for them. With one being 36 and the other 37, time may very well be running out. Yamada ends up getting the #98 bib, just after Takeda and just before rising star Hitoshi Kanno (if you're wondering where Hiromichi is, #89) thanks to his massive comeback the previous tournament. As Noboyuki Kishi gets ready to kick off SASUKE 2010, the competing All-Stars (except Katsumi, who is likely off trying to sell his excess cans of SASUKE spray) are seen talking about their potential this tournament. Nagano: I'm a little demotivated, it's a little frustrating getting that close only to fail again. Shingo: But at least we had a great time last tournament! It's been a while since we've all performed like that, I hope we can do it again! Akiyama: Well, I'm still a little worried about facing the Half-Pipe Attack again, it's a brutal obstacle, but with some luck, I'm hoping to get through it. Takeda: I just need to get back to Stage 3 again, last time was painful, and I need to redeem it. Kōji: I'm sure we can get there. As for me, I want another shot at that tower. If I can get back there, I think I can make it. First StageThe stage, while relatively unchanged from the previous tournament, has seen less success this time around, partially because the Americans, who accounted for three clears last time, are nowhere to be found, and partially because, well, it's SASUKE, you never know what will happen. Either way, 12 have advanced so far, including five out of the last six. However, only Takeda has moved on for the All-Stars, thanks to Akiyama and Katsumi failing the Soritatsu Kabe, with the latter fake retiring for the third time, and Yamamoto having arguably the sloppiest run of his career, causing him to run out of time at the Tarzan Rope. On the other side of the spectrum, a few Shin Sedai members have already advanced, those being 28 year old Tomohiro Kawaguchi, 18 year old Jun Satō, 23 year old Naoya Tajima, 25 year old Kouji Hashimoto, and 31 year old Yuuji Urushihara. Muscle Musical member Terukazu Ishikawa also cleared along with Yuji Washimi, Hiromichi, Lee, Okuyama, and Takahashi, but they aren't in a SASUKE group, so M9 didn't care about them. (as we'll soon sadly see) After Takeda's clear, the camera pans to Yamada, and a VTR begins. It shows his previous Final Stage timeout, along with his Slider Jump fail from 22, then cuts to him relentlessly training on a bungee rope in his backyard. He states to the cameraman that if he's able to reach the Final Stage again, he feels he is unstoppable. The VTR ends soon after, and announcer Keisuke Hatsuta introduces Yamada to a huge round of applause. Yamada takes a deep breath and begins his 24th attempt at SASUKE after the beeps, starting with a familiar area, the Jyunidantobi. Like the previous tournament, nobody of note sans Akira Ōmori has had any difficulty, and Yamada breezes through it. The next obstacle is one of two new ones this tournament, and just like its counterpart the Rope Junction, it is completely useless and would be better off in Total Wipeout, it's the X-Bridge. I have literally nothing to say about this, it's a worse version of the Cross Bridge, let's move on. The next challenge is the Log Grip, and while yes, it does it's job and takes out the fodder competitors, it's just like the Jyunidantobi and hasn't eliminated anyone of note in the past three tournaments. Again, Yamada passes it easily to move on to the much harder Jumping Spider. Though nobody knows it at the time, this obstacle will cause objectively a top 2 most shocking fail in SASUKE history just two runs later, with Nagano's slip only being rivaled by Urushihara's Pipe Slider mishap nearly ten years later. Being one of the few to attempt this obstacle several times and never be defeated by it, it surprises nobody when Yamada sticks the landing and traverses through the Spider Walk portion of the obstacle. Once he dismounts, he comes to the Half-Pipe Attack. This obstacle essentially ended Yamamoto's run just two runs prior, and would do the same to Kanno mere minutes later, with both taking three swings and perhaps being shaken up by it. However, Yamada only needs one swing, and safely lands to run up and face the Soritatsu Kabe. Unlike most previous tournaments, Yamada isn't able to scale the wall in one go, and has to regroup. Thankfully though, his second try is a success, and he still has a comfortable ~50 seconds to go as he reaches the Slider Jump. Though it did take him out less than a year prior, the obstacle has been significantly nerfed, and it has showed as nobody of note bar Paul Anthony Terek has failed it in the last two tournaments. Yamada takes a breath and slides down the track, lets go of the bar, and... Makes the grab. Climbing his way over the cargo net, Yamada can breathe a sigh of relief, as there are still 30 seconds as he approaches the Tarzan Rope. A swing and a short climb later, Yamada smiles and bows before smacking the finish buzzer with 11.62 seconds to go, moving on to the Second Stage for the second straight time, and becoming the 13th and ultimately final person that made it through. You all know the story with Nagano and Kanno, so I'm not gonna beat the dead horse. There's still more stories to develop. Infact, Nagano's fail is arguably only number three on the list of memorable moments from this tournament. Second Stage
Thanks to Yamada being the last runner for the first time in his career, he's gotten to witness the entire stage, and thus has seen the mixed bag of results. On the good side, Tajima, Hashimoto, Lee, Urushihara, Takahashi, Okuyama, and Takeda all cleared, but unfortunately, Satō fell victim to the Salmon Ladder, Kawaguchi the Unstable Bridge, and Ishikawa, Washimi and Hiromichi all were defeated by the Metal Spin. Still, a decent clear rate, with 7/12 advancing, and again, five of the last six. Yamada looks to join them, and gets some words of encouragement from Takeda before his run. T: How are you feeling about it? K: Same as usual, honestly. A little nervous, but nothing I can't get through. My main concern is the Unstable Bridge now being placed directly after the Salmon Ladder. Also not happy to see the Balance Tank back, that thing's almost taken me out a couple times. T: Well, are you gonna let the other Koji beat you for a second time? Kōji chuckles, smiling earnestly at Takeda's typical wit, then the camera cuts after to Yamada at the gate, and his theme plays as he is introduced by Fumiyasu Satō. He steps up to the Downhill Jump, stepping on the board and commencing what will ultimately be the last attempt on it. [Hello, this is KojiFan's editor again. They mention the whole "last attempt" thing more, so, instead of letting you read it every time, I'm just gonna keep a counter for every obstacle Yamada is the last to attempt. Cool? Cool. Also, whenever you see [] around text, it's me.] The timer starts, and Yamada takes off, sliding down the track and grabbing onto the rope, then swinging back before dismounting safely, and going up to face the Salmon Ladder. [2] Being a veteran on this obstacle, Yamada has zero issues with the first couple rungs, going up them smoothly. The penultimate rung, he pauses on for a moment, but after a couple seconds, he pulls the bar up and lands it on the final set of rungs. However, the Stick Slider is gone this tournament, so Yamada must go directly into the Unstable Bridge. Inching his way along the four chained board, Yamada keeps his eyes on his hands, making sure they're even. He shuffles across the board bit by bit until he gets to the end, then prepares to transition to the second board. He takes a swing back, then forward, reaches his hands over, and holds on, grabbing the two chained board easily. A few seconds later, he's at the platform, and manages to avoid making the same mistake Urushihara and Kawaguchi made in the past, making sure he's safe before dismounting. The next obstacle is a returning one, it hasn't been seen in three years, but Yamada still has experience on it, it's the Balance Tank. Though it hasn't done anything this tournament, it has shown it can do lethal damage, as Katsumi and Bunpei Shiratori [dang, he hasn't been mentioned like, at all, huh?] will gladly tell you. Having been previously scared by this obstacle, Yamada takes a second to gather himself, then steps on the tank and gets it rolling. Slowly but surely, Yamada reaches his target, and grabs on to the rope, pulling himself to safety and hopping down to face the Metal Spin. With more time than the previous tournament, still a comfortable 29 seconds, Yamada can afford to prepare himself. He takes a breath, gets a good run-up, jumps, and grabs on to the chain, hanging on for dear life as he spins around, and breathes a sign of relief as he makes it to the other side. Still with 21 seconds, the Wall Lifting will not be an issue, and one, two, three, the walls go over the fireman's head. He slaps the red button with a comfortable 08.18 left on the clock, making it 8 in the Third Stage. And... Wow, for once, I don't have anything else to say, there's no runs left. Alright, well, moving on! Third Stage
Man... I've been dreading talking about this stage for a while. Yes, a nearly unprecedented 5 out of 7 cleared before Yamada, but those two fails... Where do I start? The first was from Tajima, who had a mental lapse on the Gliding Ring that I can't even explain in words, and the second... Well, you know the story, even if you just started watching SASUKE a week ago. I don't even want to talk about it, but I have to. [no, you don't] Takeda, who was previously 0/12 on the Third Stage, made it all the way to the Spider Flip, but clearly exhausted, his arms have out on him before he could climb up the first board. The 13th and final Third Stage fail of Takeda's career, it is objectively the saddest. Nevertheless, after Takeda apologised to his fellow All-Stars, Yamada still went to talk to his good friend, with the hopes he could cheer him up, at least a little. K: Hey, how do you feel? T: Well, I've certainly had better days. K: Look, I know it's hard. I can't blame you for feeling like this. But you can keep trying, even if someone achieves Kanzenseiha tonight, that won't define your career forever. T: I know, I guess it just hurts knowing I've had more chances then anybody, and I've failed more than anybody. K: I understand. Still, this moment doesn't have to define your career. That's up to you. Takeda slightly smiles. T: Yeah, maybe you're right. Thank you. Kōji gives Takeda a pat on the back, then heads up the steps to start his 12th attempt on the Third Stage as his theme plays, along with a VTR of his previous Third Stage clear. After that ends, Yamada takes a deep breath and starts his attempt on the Arm Rings. [3] Easily making his way along the track, Yamada has no issues with the obstacle, to nobody's surprise. One challenge down, but the next obstacle is a new one. What is it again? Oh yeah... Yep, the Rope Junction. For once, I'm just straight up not gonna talk about this obstacle. It exists, I'll admit that, but it is useless. I mean, do you really think anyone, let alone a firefighter, is gonna fail it? No? Didn't think so. Swing, swing, swing, he dismounts, yay. Moving on... Next up is the Devil Steps, a relatively easy obstacle given its placement, and it hasn't taken anyone out since the very first attempt at it from Daisuke Miyazaki. [4] Yamada has no issues with the ascending steps, reaching the top with a steady pace, then he switches directions and descends, keeping his rhythm. Left, right, left, right, he descends the remaining steps and makes it safely to the platform, shaking his arms out and preparing to face the Shin-Cliffhanger. Though it was once the most feared obstacle of the stage if not the entire course, nobody not named Levi has failed it in the last two tournaments, and nobody at all has failed the jump to the third ledge since Okuyama back in SASUKE 22. Expectations are high as Yamada starts the Shin-Cliffhanger, [5] and easily makes his way across the first two ledges. Swinging side to side as he makes it to the apex of the second ledge, Yamada looks more focused then ever before as he reaches over... And thankfully, he safely lands on the third ledge, making the other All-Stars breathe a sigh of relief on the sidelines. Yamada steps down into the platform, having completed half of the Third Stage. He doesn't even crack a smile, he's completely in the zone now. In his mind, this is not about him anymore. This is for his friends that have supported him since day one. This is for his family. This is for his fellow All-Stars. This is for Takeda. Now, as Yamada enters the back half of the stage, his first challenge is one he's all too familiar with, the Jumping Bars. He first attempted them all the way back in SASUKE 15, where he came one bar away from being only the second person to clear them, but in his two subsequent attempts at them, he has had no issues. [6] He jumps out to the first bar and swings, back and forth, then leaps out and grabs the second bar. He repeats the process again, and again, until the grabs on to the last bar, and switches directions, another obstacle done. Next on Yamada's checklist is the Hang Climbing, another obstacle that hasn't taken anyone out apart from the first to try it. In this case, it was Takeda, back in SASUKE 21. However, since then, competitors seemed to have figured out the path, and nobody's even shown signs of struggling since. Yamada still looks laser focused as he climbs up the angled board, steadily climbing up, and not even seeming fatigued one bit. His face doesn't change whatsoever as he hooks his hands on to the Spider Flip. [7] All noise in Midoriyama seemingly evaporates, apart from the wind. The competitors on the sidelines, their families, their friends, and even the announcer, Ogasawara, are dead silent. They know what's at stake here. They all saw what just happened, they were there to witness the tragedy first-hand. Some closed their eyes, fearing for what would happen if Yamada were to fall now. Infact, one could argue that at this point in SASUKE history, there has never been more on the line than during this run right here. A slight wave of relief washes over the crowd as Yamada stands at the edge of the Spider Flip's first board, preparing to make the jump across. What many tend to forget is that this jump right here may have also taken away Takeda's last chance to make the Final Stage by defeating him in SASUKE 23. Not only that, but with five finalists already, a win is all but assured. The inevitable renewal will set everyone back to square one, and as we'll later see, it killed any chance Takeda had of making the Third Stage, let alone the tower. This jump, more than ever, had to be a good one. Takeda had to be avenged. Yamada looks out to the second board and his legs start bouncing up and down as he prepares for the leap. He gives himself a countdown in his head, three, two, one, then he leaps... ... On the sidelines, Nagano's head goes into his hands, but not out of despair like one would think. He just can not watch what's happening. Yamada made the jump, and traverses down to the green resting bar. He is one obstacle away. All that stands between him and his third shot at the Final Stage, not to mention his second consecutive one, is the Gliding Ring. [8] He takes as much time as he can get to rest his arms, then grabs on to the ring. Avoiding the mistake Tajima made, he lifts it over the stopper, then begins the slide down. Once he reaches the end, he kicks back, then forward, building as much momentum as he can. He knows what can happen if you rush, but he also knows he needs all the arm strength he can get to reserve for the Final Stage if he gets there. He takes one swing, two, three, and then, once again, all of Midoriyama is silent. In this moment, there is no control. Yamada's hands are off the ring. He now has to just hope he has enough momentum to land safely, or he could very well become the second All-Star named Yamada to blow his last chance at the Final Stage by being mere centimetres short of a dismount. Katsumi himself is intently watching on the sidelines along with everyone else, but like Yamada, they can not do anything. SASUKE is a battle of one person versus all the obstacles. As much as they may try, nobody that isn't the competitor themself can help them. Right now, that seems more clear then ever. The only thing the spectators can do is just that, spectate... And then erupt into cheers. The All-Stars jump out of their seats, the Shin Sedai clap and cheer, and Yamada himself collapses on the mat, a smile clearly visible on his stunned face. For the second time in a row, he's done what he hadn't been able to do for a decade. For the second time ever, there will be six challengers on the Final Stage, and for the second time, Yamada is one of them. It doesn't seem possible. Nobody's supposed to make the Final Stage a decade after they did initially. [except Morimoto but y'know] Yet, that's exactly what's happened. Twice. Now, all that's left to do is wait. FINAL STAGEAs any hardcore SASUKE fan will tell you, the five runs preceding Yamada's truly represent the good, the bad, and the ugly of SASUKE. The good? Shin Sedai leader Yuuji Urushihara made the climb and became the third Grand Champion with 3.5 seconds left, roughly an eight-second improvement over his SASUKE 22 attempt and a truly triumphant moment. The bad? Lee En-Chih and Okuyama came nowhere near winning and their runs wouldn't have been dramatic even if they had 50 seconds. The ugly? Well, all I need to say is "safety rope" to make any Kongu fan's blood boil. [oh yeah and Hashimoto got close, dunno how you forgot to mention that one, KojiFan] However, that's all in the past now. There is one run left, from our main man, Kōji Yamada. Before the safety harness is put on and he gets in position, he gets a chance to talk to the All-Stars. Nagano: Do you feel ready for this? Kōji: I'm as ready as I'll ever be. It definitely helps that I stood here recently. Nagano: Okay, the towel's there. Brace yourself! Yamada gets the ceremonial backslap, then takes a deep breath. Shingo: Good luck on that thing! Takeda: We'll be waiting down here for you. Akiyama: Of course, we're all rooting for you. Katsumi: Yes, we wish you luck. Kōji: Thank you. I just hope my training pays off. No matter what happens, I'll have given it my all. He walks up to the Final Stage, ready to challenge his new nemesis. He takes a look up as he is strapped into his harness, prepared for his final battle. All that's left is for announcer Keisuke Hatsuta to introduce him, and then, for the second time in roughly 100 days, arguably the most important forty seconds of Yamada's life will commence. H: Finally, we have arrived, at the final run of the tournament. 98 have fallen to the demons of Midoriyama, however, Urushihara showed the remaining challengers the way. Okuyama and Lee En-Chih could not follow in his footsteps, now there is only one man remaining. Making this third Final Stage appearance, and his second one in a row, it's 36 year old Gifu firefighter, Kōji Yamada. He is in position, he says he has been training, he says he is prepared. But now, that will all be put to the test. Just 40 seconds for him to climb 23 meters to victory. Can he do it? It is now time to find out! boom... BOOM...BOOM!!!!As the third tone sounds, Yamada immediately takes off, climbing up the Heavenly Ladder for the second time. He maintains a very steady rhythm, seemingly floating up the 13-meter ladder even as it shakes back and forth, doing everything it can to throw him off his game. Now more than ever though, he can not mess up even once. He knows he can't replicate Urushihara's pace on the G-Rope, he just can't afford to lose any time before it. So far, he hasn't, infact he's ahead of Urushihara's time by the slimmest of margins and he reaches the 10-meter mark. The last three are basically the crossing of Ts and dotting of Is, then, it's all down to the G-Rope. He's completely on it by the time the clock hits 24.5 seconds, almost exactly where Urushihara was. All he needs now is just enough push to get him up the meters in that amount of time. However, fatigue killed his two previous Final Stage attempts, leaving him within sight of the button. But, he'd been training to counteract exactly that, fatigue. Surely it couldn't happen again... Could it? Yamada's fellow competitors cheer him on as they watch him go up, and up, keeping a steady rhythm. As Yamada predicted, he quickly falls of Urushihara's pace, but not by much. However, once he reaches 17 meters, a terrifying sight is caught by one of the camera angles. Yamada has a clear grimace on his face, it seems the long course has once again taken its toll, but still, he keeps fighting. He can't let another chance slip away, he must pull through. At approximately 18.5 meters, the ten-second warning sounds. Yamada's arms are burning, screaming out to stop, but that just isn't an option. Not when you're so, so close. If you've ever been running laps in the gym, you know how this feels. Your 9-year-old legs can't handle it, you feel like you're about to throw up, you're tired of your gym coach yelling at you, and you just want to go to the nurse and say you have some made-up disease just to get out of it. But when you're at that last stretch, sometimes, you get a burst of energy you didn't know you had. You go full sprint, Sonic the Hedgehog mode, and during those few seconds, you look like you could go on for hours. With only 7 seconds left and Yamada's head just now touching the 20 meter mark, he's gonna need to go full 9-year-old in the gym mode. Six, five, four, the seconds tick down mercilessly, but Yamada does find that last reserve of strength, pushing himself up as if the laws of gravity or the human body in general don't apply to him. He can see the goal once again, but he can also hear the klaxon. He can't see the timer from his angle, but he knows it goes off six times before the dreaded timeout gunshot. Having just heard it for the fifth time, and just now getting his head level with the ring, his body goes into autopilot. As if he were reaching out for the cord on his parachute while skydiving, his left arm reaches up to attempt to hit the button. His eyes, however, are looking at the rope, not the button. This is not something anyone before him has done. This is not what Nagano did in SASUKE 12, 23, or even 13, this is not what any of the champions have done. Yamada is reaching up for the button, completely blind. His fellow competitors on the sidelines can not tell. Yamada is too far up for them to see where he's looking. They can only see his lower body, the rest is blocked by the tower itself. All they know is that there is merely one second left. Yamada himself finally seems to realise what his body is doing, and looks up at his hand... ... ... ... Just in time to see it land perfectly on the button. The smoke goes off, everyone on the sidelines starts clapping, the All-Stars jump around and hug each other like New England Patriots fans after Super Bowl 51, and Hatsuta gleefully shouts out " KANZENSEIHA!!!!" As for the man himself, Yamada takes exactly enough time to make sure he's completely on solid ground before letting go of the rope and bursting into tears of joy. With a mere 00.77 seconds showing on the timer, Kōji Yamada had finally done it. After 12 years, 24 tournaments, and 23 heartbreaks, not to mention the times he watched his friends fail, he had caught his whale. He can't even stand, he is in total disbelief. After almost a minute of tears, Yamada is finally able to compose himself and stand up at the top of the tower, looking down at the course he had finally managed to conquer. He waves to everyone and puts his head down briefly before yelling out to thank everyone, and being given a standing ovation. Once that ends, as Yamada gets ready to descend the tower, he hears Hatsuta's voice and looks back, standing next to the rails. H: Congratulations, Yamada-san! Run me through how you're feeling right now. K: Oh, I can't even... I can't explain it. It's like, this feeling of pride, but also, I feel like I did this for the other competitors, especially my fellow All-Stars. Hitting the button felt amazing, but seeing all of them down there so happy made it even better. It's like, this isn't just for me. H: So I know you've been here since the start, only competitor aside from Shingo-san to attend every single competition. Do you feel like you still have that fire, that drive to continue competing? K: Of course. Sure, this is more than likely the peak of my career, and I suppose I could go out on a high note, but... SASUKE, to me, is about much more than results. It's about the community, everyone here is amazing to compete and talk with. It's about the feeling of success you get just by standing on the start line. Most importantly, it's about my family, my kids. Above all, I want them to be happy, and I know they love watching me compete here. And I love competing here myself. It's an amazing experience. H: I think I speak for everyone when I say you're a joy to have in this competition, and ironically given your occupations, your bond with Toshihiro brings a certain fire to these tournaments. My final question is this: When looking at the results of the All-Stars, it's clear that as a whole there's been less consistency amongst them after Nagano-san's Kanzenseiha, with the 22nd tournament being the first time none made it past the First Stage. With the Shin Sedai up and coming, do you think the All-Stars can keep up with the Shin Sedai? K: Well, I will say that they're very strong competitors, as Urushihara-san proved earlier. Kanno-san, Satō-san, Tajima-san, I believe they have as much potential as anybody. As for us, I believe we still have a few more tournaments left, but eventually, the torch has to be passed on. Everybody ages, but no matter what happens, I'll always respect the Shin Sedai and any future generations, even after they surpass us. H: Sincere words, Yamada-san. Again, I congratulate you on your victory, and I cannot wait to see you again. Thank you very much for your time. K: Thank you, I can't wait to be back here. Thank you very much. Yamada descends the tower and is immediately mobbed by the All-Stars once he is back on Earth. That, he expected, but when the All-Stars lift him up and start carrying him, he knows exactly what's about to happen, something which he was not prepared for. Just like Nagano seven tournaments prior, despite his playful pleas, Yamada is tossed into the Third Stage's water pit and joined soon after by Urushihara, with the two congratulating each other as the SASUKE ending theme plays, bringing the most successful tournament in history to a close. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Massive shoutout to sasukewarrior333, he did most of the dialogue for me. Can't thank you enough, mate.
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Post by loboticialtree on Aug 21, 2023 14:51:21 GMT -5
Dang such a crazy ending, AMAZING WRITE-UP
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xelA197
Ōmori Akira
ex johnnybello & ItalianNinja08,fan of SASUKE aka Ninja Warrior since late 2008,thousand thanks GXT!
Posts: 333
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Post by xelA197 on Aug 24, 2023 15:33:01 GMT -5
Here's all Koji Yamada results in the first 24 tournaments:
SASUKE 1 | #82 | Failed Wall Lifting (Second Stage) | Time Out. Second Wall
SASUKE 2 | #86 | Failed Pipe Slider (Third Stage) SASUKE 3 | #58 | Failed Tsuna Nobori (Final Stage) | About 13.5 meters up
SASUKE 4 | #98 | Failed Cliffhanger (Third Stage) | Transition to the 3rd ledge
SASUKE 5 | #97 | Failed Soritatsu Kabe (First Stage) | Time Out. He cleared the obstacle when time expired SASUKE 6 | #92 | Failed Jump Hang (First Stage) | Mis-hit the trampoline
SASUKE 7 | #81 | Failed Cliffhanger Dansa (Third Stage) | Transition to the 3rd ledge
SASUKE 8 | #96 | Failed Rope Climb (First Stage) | Time Out. 0.2 seconds late
SASUKE 9 | #96 | Failed Lamp Grasper (Third Stage) | 13rd lamp
SASUKE 10 | #997 | Failed Jump Hang (First Stage)
SASUKE 11 | #94 | Failed Body Prop (Third Stage)
SASUKE 12 | #1 | Failed Cliffhanger Kai (Third Stage) | Real Tournament
SASUKE 13 | #88 | Failed Jump Hang (First Stage) | Real Tournament
SASUKE 14 | #57 | Failed Soritatsu Kabe (First Stage) | Real Tournament
SASUKE 15 | #70 | Failed Jumping Bars (Third Stage) | Real Tournament
SASUKE 16 | #91 | Failed Pipe Slider (Third Stage) | Real Tournament
SASUKE 17 | #95 | Failed Metal Spin (Second Stage) | Real Tournament
SASUKE 18 | #89 | Failed Salmon Ladder (Second Stage) | Transition to the 7th level
SASUKE 19 | #79 | Failed Salmon Ladder (Second Stage) | Real Tournament
SASUKE 20 | #1992| Failed Flying Chute (First Stage) | Transition to the net
SASUKE 21 | #90 | Failed Shin-Cliffhanger (Third Stage) | Transition to the 3rd ledge
SASUKE 22 | #91 | Failed Slider Jump (First Stage)
SASUKE 23 | #91 | Failed G-Rope (Final Stage) | Time Out. About 0,5 meters short
SASUKE 24 | #98 | KANZENSEIHA | 0.77 seconds left. Last Man Standing
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Sept 28, 2023 22:04:29 GMT -5
I hope this thread isn't dead just yet, but I was wondering how Kōji would do in SASUKE 25—with a revamped first stage (most obstacles he has already faced and conquered, but others not yet), as well as the second and third stages if he's able to reach them. Of course there is still SASUKE 24 that you wanted to do, so if you wanna get that out of the way first, go right ahead. I'm just really curious about his SASUKE 25 performance. So... What now?
That's the question running through everyone's mind when they complete a lifelong goal, whether it's to get under a certain score in golf, being promoted to the top of one's business chain, 100% completing Skyrim, or, in this instance, achieving Kanzenseiha in SASUKE. It does sometimes feel like there's nothing left to do, but usually, the answer to that question is just to start over and do it again.
Welcome, to SASUKE 25.Jurassic Park music playsSASUKE 25After his and Yuuji Urushihara's triumphant victories less than four months prior, 36 year old Kōji Yamada has never felt more mixed about a SASUKE tournament before coming into this one. On one hand, he's riding as high as you can be, on the other hand, the course will certainly be harder, and with age catching up to him, it may be hard to uphold his new reputation as a Grand Champion. The most concerning part to him is the First Stage, as though he did clear in the previous renewal, the producers will certainly add even more ridiculously hard and previously unthought of obstacles to the course. Now imagine the feeling you get when you think of that, and then you see a course with only two obstacles you haven't attempted. As you might expect, Yamada and the other competing All-Stars are very much relieved, happy to see more of a throwback course as opposed to something like SASUKE 18's complete overhaul. For our sadly-mostly-sidelined-in-this-story champion Urushihara however, it is a different story. He has not attempted the Rolling Maruta, Jump Hang, or Circle Slider, the three obstacles brought out of retirement in this stage, outside of Trials courses and replicas. If anything, the pressure is on him more. Though, there is now the question: Which of them gets #100? Or better yet, how is that decided? Well, my friend, that answer is simple, at least in my mind: In the case of two champions, the #100 is given to the one that had more time. And were this any other tournament, that's exactly what I'd do. But, in this case, the numbering system is mostly random. #1 through #96 are decided by a lottery system, while #97-#100 are given to the four champions as a symbol of their achievements. #97 to Akiyama, champion 1. #98 to Nagano, champion 2. Now because Yamada's victory came after Urushihara's, and the four of them were given their numbers based on chronological order, that means Urushihara gets #99, while for the first time in his career, Kōji Yamada will be wearing #100. Nagano, who has worn the number every tournament for the past six, congratulates Yamada on this honour, and once the other bibs are drawn, it's time to go. While the poor sap known as Shinichi Fukumoto gets prepared to run, [more like splash amirite hahaha no okay] Yamada talks to the only other man to compete in every tournament, Shingo Yamamoto, about their relief from seeing a throwback course. S: I'm just happy to see so many familiar obstacles! Takes me back to the good old days. K: Yeah, it's weird seeing these things back, feels like it was both so recent and so long ago somehow. Do you know how they've set up the Jump Hang? I mean, you know it's never been my favourite, but you've always seemed to be so good at it, aside from that one time. S: Ha, don't remind me! I'm not sure how far the net is from the trampoline, but I'm not worried about it. I'm only able to fail that obstacle in an extemely specific way apparently. I'm just hoping I don't have a moment on the Rolling Maruta again, when was that, like, 2000? Wow, time has gone by fast! K: Sure has, I feel so old now. Seems so weird to look down and see #100 too, that's always been for Nagano-san. S: Don't worry about it, there's no pressure! Just enjoy the course! Kōji can't help but smile at Shingo's constantly cheerful mind, and the two exchange good luck wishes before being joined by the other competing All-Stars, Akiyama, Takeda, and of course Nagano. The five of them will have time to watch, as even with the lottery, Takeda and Shingo still got #70 and #90 respectively. First StageDespite the renewal, there has been a very high amount of success, with 11 of the first 99 clearing, including the five other finalists from SASUKE 24. They're joined by Yamamoto and Takeda, Shin Sedai members Hitoshi Kanno and Jun Satō, and Americans Levi Meeuwenberg and Brian Orosco. However, on the other side, Nagano and Akiyama were felled by the Circle Slider and Soritatsu Kabe respectively, and though they were relatively unknown at the time, Masashi Hioki and Ryo Matachi were both defeated by the Circle Slider as well, along with Naoya Tajima. Overall though, the stage has been successful, and now, for the first time, Kōji Yamada will be the last one to try it. He takes a deep breath as he steps up to the start line, and having seen how the new obstacles are done, there is no worry in the fireman's head. He bows to the crowd as he is introduced, then turns back to face the course. After the beeps, Yamada starts his 25th assault on SASUKE, starting with the first of the two new areas, the Dome Steps. Though it was a pretty good obstacle, it was only kept for this tournament, possibly thanks to controversy involving Levi that you can look up if you're curious. It's done it's job, taking out almost every fodder competitor, along with Shinya Kishimoto, who is quite possibly the saddest competitor in SASUKE history when comparing potential to results. Yamada though, does not fall victim to this obstacle [despite advice from an anonymous source that he should've] and goes up to face an old friend, the Rolling Maruta. Though the obstacle hasn't been seen for over four years, it hasn't done too much today. To save you and me time, pretty much every obstacle except the Circle Slider did its job and took out people who had no chance of clearing anyway. The only exception is Richard King failing the Log Grip, but even he wasn't exactly a massive threat. Anyway, where were we? Oh yeah, Rolling Maruta. Having attempted the obstacle as many times as anybody, it isn't a problem despite the potential rust, as it never has been. The next obstacle though, has taken Yamada out not once, but twice, and technically thrice if you count SASUKE 13. It's the Jump Hang. Yamada takes a second to remember the successful technique he used so many times in the past, then he runs up to the trampoline, leaps out and grabs hold of the net, going up and over just to be safe. Though it takes a few extra seconds, nobody has timed out on the Rope Ladder today, so that's not a worry. Also not a worry is the Bridge Jump, which has taken out only one person of note, Yukio Iketani, and doesn't even get an introduction as to how it works, which should tell you something. For once, there's not even a smidge of worry as Yamada runs across the planks and grabs the rope, safely across to the other side. Next up is the Log Grip, moved from the third obstacle to the fifth for this tournament. It hasn't done much though, only taking out one other person aside from the aforementioned King. Despite having his strength sapped more from the previous obstacles, the Log Grip is no issue either, and now an old foe, the Soritatsu Kabe, awaits. There's about 45 seconds left at this point, so he can't take too many tries, but as long as he gets up pretty quick, he should be safe. Thankfully, in his first go at the wall, Yamada makes it up and over, going down to face the sadly underused Circle Slider. In theory, it's simple, you slide a circle down a track, however, it's actually grabbing hold of the circle that is the problem. One only gets a simple springboard to jump off instead of the usual trampoline, and height is of the essence. As the crowd just saw with Nagano, nobody is safe from this obstacle's wrath. There's silence as Yamada runs up to the springboard, then cheers when he grabs hold of the ring, successfully gliding to the other side with 26 seconds left. The Tarzan Rope and Rope Ladder are all that remains, and as mentioned, nobody has timed out on either obstacle today, partially due to the lack of one Takuya Kawahara in the field. Of course, the Rope Ladder is not an issue as Yamada steadily climbs up it, and though the klaxon goes off as he reaches the top, Yamada still jogs to the finish button and hits it with 06.38 showing on the timer, advancing with 11 others to the Second Stage. He gets his congratulations from his fellow All-Stars, and even from Urushihara, after he descends the pole and heads back to the sidelines. He thanks them and looks out at the Second Stage, which has been redesigned, not with old obstacles though. Actually, there is only one technically "new" obstacle, but one other has been modified, and boy, does it look scary. Second StageThe obstacle in question is a new version of the already terrifying Salmon Ladder, in which there are two ladders instead of one, the second of which must be transitioned to with the bar. It is creatively called the Double Salmon Ladder, and has already taken out Takeda and surprisingly Urushihara, the latter of which, well... I don't even know how to describe what he did other than perplexing, but let's just say if you give anyone a thousand attempts to fail in the same way, you'll get lucky to see it happen once. The other four finalists from 24 have all advanced however, along with Brian Orosco. Kanno and Yamamoto both were eliminated on the Balance Tank, marking the second straight time they failed the same obstacle, while Levi failed on the brand new Slider Drop in what would ultimately become his final appearance. Jun Satō failed on the Unstable Bridge, but he also didn't compete for a while after 25, so we don't care about him for now. We do care about Yamada however, and his run is about to begin. He is seen talking to his wife and kids [who haven't been mentioned like, at all, great job there pal] before he steps up to the start line and the gates open up to reveal the new Grand Champion. He stands before the new Stage 2 starter, the Slider Drop, and after the beeps, he hops up to the bar and starts sliding. He keeps the bar steady even through the drop, and safely lands on the platform. The Double Salmon Ladder awaits however. With Urushihara's fail fresh on his mind, Yamada shakes his head as if he's removing all thoughts of the past from it, then hops up and grabs the bar, beginning his ascent. He swiftly makes his way up the first ladder, hopping the bar up easily, his experience on the original version certainly helping. Now comes the tricky part though, the transition to the second ladder. Yamada turns around and gets his swing going while the crowd looks on, watching as the last remaining SASUKE All-Star swings, and swings, then he hops the bar over to the second ladder, thankfully sticking the transition. He's not out of the woods yet though, as we saw from Takeda, the second ladder is every bit as failable as the first. It is shorter though, and Yamada need only make two jumps this time, which he does safely. He can't rest though, as directly after that is the Unstable Bridge. I can attest that this obstacle looks harder than it is, as I myself have cleared a replica of it and my upper body strength is not even close to as good as anybody who's attempted the real thing on SASUKE. I'll tell you one thing it is though, and that's precise. It does not allow errors, if one of your hands lands on the bridge slightly before the other one, you're going for a swim. The four chained plank is the easy one, however, the hardest part is right after, the transition between boards. Yamada takes a few seconds to build up momentum, then he leaps out and grabs hold of the second board, hopping his way over to the dismount. He swings back to make sure he lands safely and checks off another obstacle, but the next challenge is the Balance Tank, which Yamada knows all too well. He's never actually failed here of course, but as anyone who's watched SASUKE 12 will tell you, he has had quite the, uh... History with this obstacle. It's more difficult now with a rope at the end and a gap between the end of the track and the wall, making his save now impossible. Thankfully though, having gained experience on the tank, he doesn't need it. He's able to ride it out until he can leap to the rope, avoiding the mistake Yamamoto made of jumping too early and climbing over the wall to face the always deadly Metal Spin. He looks at the clock, which shows 21 seconds and counting. He takes a breath, then runs up and leaps out to the chain... And despite his hands being dangerously low, he's able to hang on and get to the other side, and with 14 seconds left as he touches the first wall, time is not an issue. The 30 kilo wall goes up, same with the walls weighing 40 and 50 kg, and though the klaxon goes off multiple times again, Yamada is still home and dry with 04.43 left on the timer, marking the first time he's made it to Stage 3 thrice consecutively in the 2000s. He smiles and gives a thumbs-up to his fellow All-Stars, hugging Takeda after and getting pats on the back from Nagano, Yamamoto and Akiyama. See, what has gone unsaid about this tournament is that this is only the third time Yamada has been the last All-Star standing, the first time being in SASUKE 19 and the second of course being 24. You all know the story with those two times, 19 was tragedy, 24 was triumph, but this time, it's different. What Yamada feels more than ever right now is the pressure of keeping the All-Star name alive. Nagano has begun his decline and openly has stated he knows he's past his prime, Shiratori is done, Akiyama is nearly done, Katsumi has almost hit his mid-life crisis and will soon become a mentor, and while Shingo and Takeda are 35 and 34 respectively, still younger than stars such as Yoshiyuki Okuyama and Yamada himself, albeit the latter by a few less years, the former will only make Stage 2 three more times (so far) while the latter would never again go beyond the Salmon Ladder. Of course, Yamada doesn't know all this now, but what he does know is that in this tournament, and likely a few future ones, he's the last All-Star standing. He was after Yamamoto failed, infact. And in a rare sight, the cameras catch a few tears from the fireman, as he states to the other All-Stars that he's happy he didn't let them down. He's even down on one knee after a bit, feeling emotions that he and I can't even describe. The All-Stars start to walk away to let him be, to which Yamada calls them back. He wants to talk to them, assuring them he's okay and just feeling a bit overwhelmed by pressure. And who can blame him? He's a new Grand Champion, #100 for the first time, and likely to be the Last Man Standing for the second time in a row. He's never been in this position before. It's often a lonely life out there on the SASUKE course. Sometimes you just need to be with the friends you have. Third StageAfter a few minutes and pep talks from his friends, Yamada is ready to head to his next challenge, the Third Stage. He conquered the previous version twice in a row, something only Nagano and Akira Ōmori [yep] have done before, and something only Yūsuke Morimoto would do after him. If there's one thing he was confident about, it was this stage. The producers threw new obstacle at him, they brought old ones back, they made existing ones harder, it didn't matter. He's made it here. He's prepared for the new stage. He's prepared for anything. ... He was not prepared for this. insert footage of 25's Third Stage revealKoji: I hate to sound pessimistic, but... I don't think I'm beating this one. Nagano: Truth be told, I don't think anyone expects you to. Just look at this thing, they were clearly out for blood this time. That alleviates a lot of the pressure. Shingo: Besides, you never know, do you remember when they brought the Salmon Ladder in? That thing looked impossible back then, but Makoto, Shunsuke and Kenji all overcame it. In fact, Makoto almost beat the Shin-Cliffhanger on the first time trying it. Takeda: I agree, I think all you need to do right now is give it your all, and if you don't make it, you'll still be back next year. Going from a two Final Stage appearances and a Kanzenseiha to a Third Stage fail is incredibly respectable. Koji: I suppose you guys are right. I guess I'll just have to try and slay this beast. Just look at it though, doesn't it look like the most intimidating obstacle ever? Shingo: We're the only two to have seen them all in person, and I'd have to agree, visually nothing strikes as much fear as it. Akiyama: Well it's useless to ask me, you know I can't judge it on that aspect. The All-Stars chuckle at Akiyama's quip, alleviating some of the nervousness in the air, then Yamada walks up to the start line as his theme music plays and a VTR of his previous two Third Stage clears are shown, along with his Kanzenseiha moment from the previous competition. If there's anyone who can beat this stage, well, it's probably an Unlimited Cliffer, but if there's anyone else, it'd seem like it'd have to be him. He takes a deep breath and looks out at the obstacles, then gives up a thumbs-up to the sidelines and begins his quest for his third straight Final Stage attempt. Yamada starts out on the first brand new obstacle, the Roulette Cylinder. Though not necessarily a killer on its own, it's a heavy strength drainer and combined with the rest of the opening part of this stage, will wear you out for the Ultimate Cliffhanger. Think of it as a harder Rumbling Dice. The loud clanking of the cylinder is heard, seemingly the only noise now as everyone watches the Last Man Standing. He makes his way slowly and steadily along the track, surviving through the drops, albeit with a slightly close call on the second one where his left hand slipped down a bit, and getting closer to the end, until he stops and starts to get in a good position to reach out to the second new obstacle, the Doorknob Grasper. Though it may not look hard, as Brian Orosco will tell you, the fact that the doorknobs spin make the obstacle a million times harder. It's easy to lose grip since you have to only hold on with one hand, but Yamada is doing well to hang on to the spinning knobs one by one, despite just having his strength sapped by the Roulette Cylinder. His fellow All-Stars cheer him on as he reaches out to the final doorknob, grabbing it and dropping safely to the first resting platform. Two obstacles are down, but the next two are possibly the most brutal combo yet, and maybe the most brutal combo ever that isn't just flat out impossible. The first of the deadly duo is the Floating Boards, an obstacle that while only used once on SASUKE, certainly had its presence felt elsewhere, mostly American Ninja Warrior. It's an insane strength drainer and can also take people out on its own, which it nearly did to Okuyama. Yamada can't think about him though, he has a course to beat. After taking his rest time, he grabs hold of the first board and locks his legs in position, reaching out to the second board and doing the same thing. It takes him a bit longer to transfer to board number three, and by the time he does, he's visibly taxed, slowing down significantly and having to dig deep just to even touch the fourth board, but once he gets one hand on, he's able to flip his legs over and his other hand follows. He swings back and forth for a few seconds before dismounting and wiping his forehead, still smiling despite the course having done a number on him. And boy, let me tell you, he's not even close to finishing. No, no, you see, there's still the Ultimate Cliffhanger, which, I would love to describe, but I really don't think I can. All I'll say is it has six ledges, one of which is 15cm long and must be transitioned to a la the Shin-Cliffhanger. Yeah, you really don't need me to tell you that it's hard, but, it's not impossible. Lee En-Chih right before him came close to making the big gap to the third ledge and- Yeah, you're not even thinking for a second that he's gonna clear this are you? Alright, that's fair. But at least let me type it out like there's a shot, okay? Please? Thank you. He shakes out his tired arms and applies chalk to his hands, looking up at the beast that has defeated almost everyone in this Third Stage. Infact, four of the other five SASUKE 24 finalists all met their defeat here, with Takahashi failing the transition to the second ledge, Okuyama failing the first ledge, and Koji Hashimoto and Lee En-Chih failing to reach up to the third ledge. Now, everyone watches as they see how Yamada will fare. He makes his way across the first ledge, traversing all the way across it to make the transition easier, and he reaches up to ledge number two. His pace slows and he even stops at one point, but Yamada still presses on, making his way near the end of the second ledge and looking up at the third before reaching up... And then promptly following the old saying, what goes up, must come down. Yamada's right hand comes up short of the ledge and he falls back down into the murky waters, bringing his attempt and SASUKE 25 to a close with yet another failure on the seemingly impossible Ultimate Cliffhanger. He gets out of the water as the ending theme plays, and he is seen confirming to the All-Stars the difficulty of the Third Stage's new toughest challenge. Nagano gives him a pat on the back and congratulates him on his effort, while Yamamoto jokingly states that the ledge was moved up prior to the run, making everyone around laugh at his always playful attitude before the credits are rolled and the 25th edition of SASUKE comes to a close, with everyone defeated by the renewed course. SASUKE 26, say what you will about it, definitely wouldn't be making things any easier. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Did you ever notice how all the strong competitors got a number ending in 9 or 0 out of the lottery?
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Oct 11, 2023 16:37:34 GMT -5
[none of this matters now lolz]
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Oct 26, 2023 17:13:07 GMT -5
Hey, everyone.
For the last six months, you've basically known me as "that guy who writes about Kōji". I'm happy to be known as that, but, sadly, I can't say I'll fill that role anymore.
The fact that SMF is shutting down at the end of this year, and the slow realisation I'm having that I can't change that by myself or really even have an effect on that decision, it's just completely broke my motivation to write the rest of this timeline out. I feel like I'm being timed when I previously wasn't, like there's a deadline, because, well, there is... And whenever I've thought of this thread, I've been sad, because I know I'm just not gonna get it done.
You all deserve to know and not just be hung out to dry, so, as much as I hate to say it, assuming nothing changes, I'm done with this timeline. I'm grateful I at least got to write out two-thirds of it, and I really appreciate the positive feedback I've been getting. But trying to even start writing the timeline again makes me sad, and I can't force myself to do things. It'll just make the quality noticeably worse, and I love all of you too much to do that when I've been putting in maximum effort into these previous posts.
Again, I can't stress enough, I got such a big smile whenever I saw just one of you like a post in this thread, mine or someone else's, and I smiled every time I saw the views, it made me feel like I was this big thing, like I was producing a TV show or something. Every time I got a request for a new tournament, I was glad I could keep this going. But, even were I to get a request, I just don't think it'd do anything for me mentally.
I appreciate everyone that took the time to read just one of my posts, or even skim through it, or whatever. And I do have to give a massive thanks to sasukeninjawarrior and everyone else who made a thread like this before me, for the inspiration. You're all awesome.
With that said, I hope you all have a great day, I hope to talk to you again. Love you all.
-Sincerely, KojiFan
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Nov 24, 2023 1:21:18 GMT -5
Yeah, so, all that sad stuff above? Ignore it, act like it was never there! We're back, baby!
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Post by loboticialtree on Nov 24, 2023 18:03:50 GMT -5
hell yeah, Koji Yamada's odyssey shall be revealed.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Dec 23, 2023 15:30:48 GMT -5
The question most if not all people will ask themselves at some point is "Have I peaked?", and for the longest time, I've held the opinion that it's a foolish question to ask, because it's a question that never, ever gets answered. In the moment, you don't know, and when you do know, you no longer care. But, once I got into sports, I realised that there, it's a pretty fair question. Sport careers have beginnings, primes, and ends. Some sports, like baseball and gridiron football, have definitive definitions to what a career is shaped like, for anyone not named Raúl Ibañez at least. But, right now, the sport that matters is SASUKE, where... Well, who knows what a career would look like. Some people peak in their teens, others their late 30s or early 40s. Some careers begin in one's 30s, some end in one's 20s. But, what happens with a career that's reached the one true peak of SASUKE, Kanzenseiha?
Well, you could end up like Kazuhiko Akiyama, and immediately go into a slump that lasts 3 years, give everyone false hope with two deep runs, and then go back into said slump that lasts forever. You could be Makoto Nagano, possibly the reason you're even seeing this right now, and dominate for a whole era after your win before you pass off the torch. You could turn out to be a Yuuji Urushihara, where you win twice, slump after your second one, then have a completely unheard of, unprecedented resurgence in your god damn 40s with no end in sight. Or, you could wind up like Yūsuke Morimoto, a seemingly invincible SASUKE powerhouse that will more than likely end up getting his third win two months from now, and by the way, is only 31. You could follow any of those paths.
Or, you could create a new one.
For the namesake of this timeline, he and everyone except myself is completely in the dark as to what will happen. But, I can't say he isn't wondering the ultimate question, has he peaked? He achieved Kanzenseiha two tournaments ago, then was felled by a seemingly impossible obstacle last time and still had the tied-best result, but... He's 37. Nothing good lasts forever. And with all his friends seemingly on a decline, he can't help but wonder if he will have to let the younger forces such as Urushihara and Hitoshi Kanno surpass the All-Stars once and for all. "At least I got the win", he thinks, knowing that no matter what happens, he's done what very few can ever even dream of. Still though, the thoughts are in the back of his mind that he, like Nagano, Toshihiro Takeda, and all the other competitors that have been the staple of SASUKE for years, is on his way out.
Well, only one way to see if he's right.
SASUKE 26
Deja vu. You may have heard of it before. It's a feeling that, at least from my experience, makes you wonder if your dreams are real. And it, right now, is exactly what the All-Stars are feeling. One of them won two tournaments ago, then the renewal tournament saw decent success, but everyone who got to the Third Stage was felled by a Cliffhanger... And we all know what happened after. The biggest bloodbath in SASUKE history. Kōji of all people knows the feeling, seeing as he kept that tournament from being a 1/0/0/0, and one that may have had the show be rioted against. But still, while Kōji may try and keep the stress at bay, he's also feeling another emotion. Loneliness.
You see, no matter what happened throughout his SASUKE career, Kōji Yamada has always had friends within the community. While he has always talked to other less prominent competitors given the opportunity, his closest mates have always been his fellow All-Stars. And while, yes, Yamamoto, Nagano, Katsumi, Shiratori, and Akiyama have always been there for him and vice versa, you'll never see a bond in SASUKE closer than the one he had with Toshihiro Takeda. It was just meant to happen, the two not only share a job, but a home prefecture. Ever since their first meeting in the spring of 2000, the two had been close friends, often trained together when they weren't working, and could pretty much always be seen joking together on the sidelines when they weren't rooting on a fellow competitor.
But now, for the first time in 11 years, Takeda isn't by Yamada's side. Due to a scheduling conflict, he was unable to attend the tournament. And while Yamada knew this beforehand, he still can't help but look to his left side, where Takeda usually stood, and see a void.
Of course, there's always the voice saying "He wouldn't want you to be sad cause he's not here, go out and do your best like always!", but it's hard to listen to. Most will tell you it's impossible to just magically feel better, and the ones who don't are lying. However, Kōji currently has someone who most people don't. Yes, Takeda isn't there, but, if there's one man to rely on to appear at a SASUKE tournament, it's the man who usually stands to Yamada's other side, the one man who could actually potentially make someone feel like the bee's knees with a snap of his fingers.
Shingo Yamamoto.
Now, while it is physically impossible to hate the man, some poor saps do actually manage to understate his goofiness, and the uncanny ability he has to lighten the mood at any point. You may have seen him do so in previous points during this timeline, or just from watching SASUKE in general. And in this case, all he needed was Yamada to take one look at him before his somewhat somber expression turned into the happiest one he'd had since roughly 366 days ago.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, right in front of Yamada was the man himself, dressed up in orange pants and a black shirt with "FIRE RESCUE EMS" printed on like he was about to go trick-or-treating, and also holding a picture of Takeda over his own face. Yamada can't help but laugh and smile, gently tapping his knee as one does when they find something funny, [or is that just me?] and only regaining the ability to speak after a good 15 seconds of laughter from himself and the other All-Stars.
K: Alright, that is amazing. Did you come up with that?
S: I had a bit of help from the guys, but when I heard Takeda-san wasn't coming, I got to work!
K: Well, I appreciate it, really. I mean it, that's so cool, thank you.
S: No problem! I'll even see if I can ask for a second run with these clothes on, haha.
K: Hah, would be nice. Thanks again, you're a mood saver.
S: That's my job! One of them, at least. And hey, remember, he'll be back next time anyway, for real!
Yamada nods and smiles while Shingo heads off to change back into his iconic uniform that we all know and love. Now, that's a long enough intro innit? Let's get to the tournament!
First Stage
So, SASUKE 26. For all its faults, it seemingly had a very good course, especially here in the First Stage. Three brand new obstacles kicked things off, with those being the Step Slider, Hazard Swing, and Rolling Escargot, the latter of which took out several strong competitors such as Hitoshi Kanno, Daisuke Miyazaki, Minoru Kuramochi, Kenji Takahashi, and even Yamamoto. There's also the Giant Swing replacing the Circle Slider, but it's just kinda... there. Aside from that, the Jumping Spider and Half-Pipe Attack have returned, and they have both just taken out Nagano and Urushihara respectively, the former having his worst performance since SASUKE 10 and the latter having his worst performance ever.
However, despite all these fails, ten people have still managed to press the red button, including five Americans, Terukazu Ishikawa, Naoki Iketani for the first time since SASUKE 16, Lee En-Chih for the sixth straight time, Yoshiyuki Okuyama for the fifth straight time, and Kōji Hashimoto for the fourth straight time. There have also been a couple close calls, with Daisuke Morikami, Takuya Kawahara, and Shane Daniels all timing out on the Rope Ladder. The 99 runs beforehand are all in the back of everybody's mind now though, as SASUKE's fourth ever champion steps to the start line to avenge his fallen friends.
What you might've noticed is that in the aforementioned list of clearers, there are no All-Stars. Katsumi, Yamamoto, and Nagano have all been beaten by the course, with none of them even sticking the landing on the Jumping Spider. And with Akiyama, Shiratori, and Takeda nowhere to be seen, Yamada is the only one left. It is true that he's been the last All-Star standing before, infact, he has been the last competitor standing for the previous two tournaments. But, he's never been in this specific position before.
Only once ever, in SASUKE 22, has there not been a single All-Star to clear. One other time, SASUKE 19, Yamada was the only All-Star to clear. But, both of those times, Yamada wasn't the last All-Star to run, and in the case of 19, he was actually the first. Here, he's in a spot he's never been in. He has no Nagano to fall back on this time. Either he clears, or for the second time, the All-Stars are wiped out by the First Stage. He even states to a reporter that he feels more pressure now than for any run of his career, even his previous Final Stage attempts.
That's what happens when you add that third digit to your bib.
Nagano then gives Yamada a back slap, the tradition reserved normally for Takeda. Yamada stands up and takes a deep breath as his theme plays and the camera pans through the Midoriyama night to show the course, until it eventually reaches the man himself. Wataru Ogasawara introduces the 37 year old fireman, who like usual, bows to the crowd and his fellow competitors as the beeps sound. After the fourth one, it's game time.
As mentioned previously, the first three obstacles are new, and the first one is the Step Slider. It's for once, pretty much what the name implies. Competitors have to cross four Rokudantobi-shaped steps and immediately grab a rope, which they then hold on to as it slides across a track and carries the competitor to the platform. Like pretty much every opening obstacle ever, it's done its job and has taken out all the fodder competitors, but no big names have gone down here today. Being an expert of both step obstacles and ropes, it surprises nobody when Yamada breezes through and makes his way up the platform to challenge the second new obstacle, the Hazard Swing.
I'm not sure what to say about this obstacle really, it's not bad but it just... Didn't do anything. Yeah, it took out a few people (and gave us a really funny fail from Yoshio Kojima) but nobody seems to really remember it. Which, I mean, fair enough. The premise of the obstacle is that competitors must stand on an oversized 1940s playground swing and rock it back and forth using their own momentum until they can dismount to the platform placed roughly two and a half meters away from the swing. Again, it's no shocker when Yamada clears it easily with just one swing, but the next obstacle won't be so easy. It's the Rolling Escargot.
As mentioned earlier, this obstacle has done massive damage, and has taken out a lot of other competitors aside from just the ones mentioned. Little-known fact, it actually was modified mid-tournament because the original design was so brutal, and it still did all this. So yeah, needless to say, there's some thoughts fluttering around in everybody's heads. As for the obstacle itself, it's simple in concept. Competitors place their extremities on holds and use their own momentum to get a wheel spinning down a track in a similar fashion to the Rolling Maruta. Actually doing so however, nowhere near as simple. But, it's what must be done.
Yamada locks his hands and feet into position, then gets the wheel spinning. The other All-Stars watch on as it goes around once, twice, then starts picking up speed. Despite probably feeling like a 7 year old on a very fast roller coaster, Yamada's able to keep his grip and safely dismounts, avoiding the fate so many other strong competitors were given. Now comes an old foe however, the Jumping Spider. Though it may not be obvious, it is harder than before, with the obstacle being similar to how it was back in SASUKE 19. Yeah, the deja vu really is kicking in for our man here.
Yamada hops down to the base of the run-up, then leans back and charges forward to the trampoline, hitting it very close to the center...
Just not close enough.
While the distance was good, Yamada's jump got him just too low to lock his legs in place, and he could only get the tips of his shoes on before plummeting down to the water, ending his run far earlier than most expected. With that fail, the All-Stars are defeated in the First Stage for the second time, no past or future Grand Champions cleared for the first time since SASUKE 10, and not only that, none of them even made it to the Warped Wall. A drastic switch in results that not even Nostradamus could've expected, and it's left the audience completely silenced.
As for Yamada himself, all he can do is laugh it off and shake his head, telling the sideline reporter that it was just a silly mistake and he didn't look at where he was jumping, too focused on looking ahead to the Spider Walk portion. He sighs and dries himself off as he walks to the other All-Stars, who stand in silence for a bit before Kōji himself breaks the ice.
K: I apologise. That shouldn't have happened. I should be at the button right now, that was... Ahh.
N: Don't worry about it. I should be dry right now anyway.
S: As should I. Though I blame my hat, it got in my face when it fell off!
As usual, Shingo's wit and bubbly personality lighten the mood, making even the crowd behind the All-Stars chuckle a bit. The drama is by no means over though. While most of the big names are defeated, there are still ten left, and three more stages they must pass.
Aftermath
That ten would swiftly turn into six, as Travis Furlanic, Iketani, Ishikawa, and Hashimoto were all knocked out by the Second Stage. As for the Third Stage, while a bit of progress was made, nobody was able to even come close to beating the Ultimate Cliffhanger, with Lee En-Chih and Yoshiyuki Okuyama coming the closest. This new era of SASUKE seems more difficult than ever before, but as some 18th century philosopher probably said, you never know what's gonna happen until it happens.
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I was suggested by an anonymous source to show the obstacles out of order, and believe me, it was very tempting.
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Post by ahzoo on Jan 23, 2024 13:05:58 GMT -5
I'm curious to see what we'll happen in any of the following: - 27, [as that one was ludicrously nerfed], - 28 [as it's an interesting [case study in terms of how the ultimate disrespect would affect him mentally], - 30 [as that was the easiest S1 we have had since 2000 lol, and to see if you have the heart to let its S2 BS spoil an otherwise surefire comeback], - 31 [and its rebalancing of the course to Koji's logical benefit imo], - 32 [if only for the dialogue and Nagano's retirement], - 33 [because we need that sorry excuse for a tourney to have *some* sort of happy moment to come out of it lol], - 34 [as he'd be 44 and as such, on the verge of a record], - 35 [as, I'm ready to have my heart broken reading his retirement run],
A special little sneaky request: - 38 [as he could easily make a one-off appearance due to COVID, and I want to see him kick up enough of a sh!tstorm over Takeda's FBK thing as to force Inui into recognising the clear],
And finally, - 40 [as it's already my favourite tournament, and having his show up at 3999 can only help to improve it].
Or in other words, every single last drink in the bar, dear tender, as I'm fairly sure that's all of the ones that you might wish to write lol.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Feb 11, 2024 11:19:39 GMT -5
- 27, [as that one was ludicrously nerfed], What do you do when you lose something you love?
It's an impossible question to answer, because everyone will do so differently, and they're all right. Whether it be a family member, a pet, or even something that's not alive like a childhood toy or your house via fire, you just don't know what to do for a while. Often times, you have no control over losing what you did, which only compounds the confusion. If it's a living person or animal, you might give a tribute to them, hold a funeral, whatever. If it's inanimate, you can try to replace it, even though it'll never truly feel the same.
But what if it's none of those categories, and also something that can't be replaced?
You see, in late January, the year of our lord 2000 and pocket aces, news came out that SASUKE itself, the show people had grown to love, (and a certain someone a bit more than that...) was ending. Forever. There was doubt about there even being a SASUKE 27 for a while, but thankfully, it was announced at a date unknown to me that there would be. One last tournament, taped in July 2011. 100 competitors as always, all of them given one final chance to show what they can do before the path to Kanzenseiha is closed off for good.SASUKE 27 Yep, this is it. It seems very likely to everyone participating and watching that this tournament right here will be the last one, no matter what happens. Kanzen, UCH ending, anything in between, it doesn't matter. Monster9 is going bankrupt and with nobody immediately coming forward to pick up SASUKE, it seems all but done. But, the competitors all seem to realise that being sad and sulking isn't gonna help anything. They're all still going to treat it like any other tournament, and infact, some are even taking it a bit lighter than normally, like one last hurrah with your college friends before you graduate. Among these competitors are the only two to compete in all 27 editions of SASUKE, 37 year olds Kōji Yamada and Shingo Yamamoto. They've been talking to each other since day one, literally. While it wasn't an actual conversation, Yamada was watching Yamamoto's first ever run and congratulated him after his clear, with Yamamoto returning the favour later in the tournament. With those interactions and the two sharing results in the next two tournaments, it was only a matter of time before they became friends. And even now, they've told each other that no matter what happens, they and the other All-Stars have to have fun. It's a bit easier than last time though, for one reason. While he's still not competing due to not wanting to risk injury to himself, having just been promoted, Toshihiro Takeda is back at Midoriyama to spectate this tournament. The All-Stars all give him a welcome friendlier than that substitute gym teacher who doesn't care about the curriculum and lets everyone have fun, (big up Mr. Goss) patting him on the back before the competing All-Stars go over to receive their start positions. Since this is meant to be the final tournament, it would be criminal to not give Nagano #100, which is exactly what M9 did. Still being the most recent champion though, Yamada is given #99. Katsumi is #91 and Yamamoto #81, so the All-Stars will have some time to watch the First Stage unfold before things get serious. And boy, what a stage it was. First StageYes, the stage did have a few changes. The first being a new obstacle, the Spin Bridge, replacing the Giant Swing, which was modified and moved to 1.3, pushing the Rolling Escargot back to 1.2. The second change was that the Half-Pipe Attack's landing mat was made, well, no longer a mat. Instead, it was possibly one of the worst ideas in history, a small wooden plank. Actually. I don't know why they did that. But anyway, the third change was 5 seconds taken off the time limit, which in theory should make for a difficult stage, but... Absolutely not. Before Yamada's run, a whopping 26 competitors had cleared. I cba to list them all, but they include 9 out of 10 ANW qualifiers, (the other of which suffered a career-ending ACL injury on said wooden plank, rip bozo ) future stars Kazuma Asa and Ryo Matachi, veterans Koji Hashimoto and Yoshiyuki Okuyama, champion Yuuji Urushihara, and some Morimoto guy my editor is telling me to mention. The only shock failures so far have been from Taiwan's Lee En-Chih, who somehow failed the very first obstacle and got outperformed by Katsuhide Torisawa, Yamamoto, who failed the new Spin Bridge, and Kenji "Kongu" Takahashi, who met the same fate at the exact same spot. And yes, Katsumi failed the Soritatsu Kabe again, is that really shocking? Despite the success of the competitors before him, Yamada still takes nothing for granted, stating in his pre-run interview that Lee just gave him a reminder that this is still SASUKE, and anyone, no matter how skilled or experienced, can fail anywhere. He shakes his head to get the nerves out as Keisuke Hatsuta introduces him, and he bows to the crowd before starting his 27th and seemingly final First Stage run. The first obstacle hasn't changed from SASUKE 26, it's still the Step Slider, albeit a bit scarier than usual given what happened 5 minutes again. The steps are no problem, and Yamada makes sure to keep his legs high and bent before safely dismounting and climbing up to the moved Rolling Escargot. Unlike last tournament, it hasn't done much notable damage, with the main fails on it being Kinnikun Nakayama in his return from a 6-year hiatus, Torisawa providing possibly the funniest fail in any Ninja show, ever, and from a guy who (allegedly) had the whole wheel come off the track. How he is still with us, I don't know, but that's neither here nor there. The obstacle seems to be, and probably is, a whole lot easier than in 26, so it's not a problem for Yamada, who quickly dispatches it and now faces the redesigned Giant Swing. While it did take out future star Masashi Hioki, that fail was so forgettable that I even forgot about it until writing this sentence, so overall it's done next to nothing. That doesn't change, as with a swift jump and swing, Yamada is through and onto the obstacle that took him out for the first time in SASUKE 26, the Jumping Spider. It has been made easier, but again, it's never a gimme. Yamada takes a deep breath and pauses for a second, then runs up and jumps... And sticks the landing, swiftly moving through the Spider Walk portion with speed bettered only by Nagano. Still with a healthy 80 seconds on the clock, Yamada takes a second before running up to the Half-Pipe Attack. Having more attempts at this obstacle than anyone not named Yoshiyuki Okuyama with this being his 7th, the rope is not even a challenge to grab. The dismount however, is a bit trickier than usual, and Yamada holds the rope for an extra swing to slow himself down and make sure he doesn't make a silly error. It works, allowing the fireman to advance to the Soritatsu Kabe, which, uncharacteristically, hasn't done much aside from taking out Katsumi and future Third Stager Shinya Kishimoto, who easily could've failed earlier if we're being honest. With over a minute left, Yamada does a small run back and forth, then charges at the massive wall and gets both hands on the top, pulling himself up and over easily. The next area is the new one though, the Spin Bridge. Though it hasn't done much damage, it has taken out Shingo, and seeing an All-Star fail an obstacle has always messed with Yamada's mind throughout his career. He glances at the clock, seeing around 50 seconds, so he takes a breath. He runs towards the spherical bridge, looking down and running across. One, two, three, and though he slightly stumbles on the last ball, his momentum carries him forward and safely to the platform. A smile on his face, Yamada now knows the last climb is a formality. He takes hold of the Tarzan Rope and swings across, grabbing the Rope Ladder and beginning to climb. The crowd chants his name as the Grand Champion pulls himself onto the bridge and strolls to the finish button, finishing with the most time left for any clear in his career, a whopping 29.15 seconds left on the clock. Normally, that would be the fastest time, but this First Stage had a very lenient time limit, allowing the speed record to be broken thrice, by Yousuke Kaneko, Travis Furlanic, and David Campbell, the latter of which held the record for 12 years with 44.32 seconds remaining. He gives his signature bow to the crowd and slides down the pole, telling the sideline reporter when asked about his clear time that he didn't even feel he was going that fast. He makes his way over to the other All-Stars to receive congratulations, thanking them. Once the clear music wraps up and the camera cuts, Yamada is seen next to Nagano, giving the latter advice as he steps to the start line. K: Nagano-san? N: Yes? K: Before you start, just relax, yeah? They've given us a lot of time today, use it if you need to. I want to see you get through. N: Definitely. Let's do this! And indeed, Nagano would make use of his time, finishing with under 10 seconds left but still moving on, making it 28 in the Second Stage, the most since Dilbert was airing on UPN, since Bill Clinton was president of the U.S., since France v. Brazil was the most recent World Cup matchup, since the world was panicking about how to program the number 2 into computers, since- Okay, yep, you get the point, it's a lot of clears. Moving on. Second Stage
The stage itself is unchanged from SASUKE 25 and 26 outside of the time limit being dropped by 5 seconds, but, as First Stage clearfests often cause, there have so far been more fails on it than the past three tournaments combined (yes, actually) as 17 of the 26 challengers so far have failed or ran out of- actually, nobody's timed out on the Second Stage in the last five tournaments. Yay! Anyway, the notable failures include 5 of the remaining 9 Americans, Naoki Iketani in his last ever Second Stage appearance, Hitoshi Kanno injuring himself after the Slider Drop, (surely this won't be a reoccuring thing...) Naoya Tajima actually failing the Slider Drop then disappearing into thin air, and lastly, Yousuke Kaneko having possibly the most Total Wipeout-esque fail in Ninja history on the Double Salmon Ladder. On the other side of the spectrum, you have the 9 who have cleared so far. These include four Americans including Campbell, Kōji Hashimoto, breakout star Ryo Matachi, Terukazu Ishikawa for the first time since SASUKE 14, Okuyama for the sixth straight tournament, and champion Urushihara. Just Yamada and Nagano are left to run, and the two of them are seen talking as Yamada walks up the stairs. K: I don't feel too confident, I don't know why. N: What's got you worried? K: The time limit, honestly. N: Really? K: Mhm. I feel like I'm going to take a lot of time on the Salmon Ladder and bridges there. N: Even if you do, you should be okay. Don't stress about it. You've cleared this stage before. K: Yeah. I'll do my best, I'll see you at the finish line. With that, Yamada's theme plays and Fumiyasu Satō introduces the Grand Champion. He bows and jumps up to the Slider Drop once the timer starts, commencing his unprecedented 18th attempt at the Second Stage (and before anyone says that's unrealistic, if Takeda had cleared in 1-4, 25 would've been his 20th Stage 2 attempt) as the bar slides down the track. He survives the drop and lets go after, dropping down safely to the mat and walking up to his old friend, the Double Salmon Ladder. Though it hasn't done anything too notable apart from Urushihara breaking every law of physics in the span of half a second, it's still the Salmon Ladder, and very feared amongst the competitors, Yamada being no exception having failed here twice before. The first ladder is no problem for him, but the tricky part comes next, the transition between ladders. He switches his hands around, then builds up a swing. He goes back, then forth, back again, then hops the bar over... Safely, but not without a scare. Due to his swing going slightly sideways, his right arm ended higher than his left and the bar lands lopsided, but Yamada is able to recover after a few seconds. The last rungs on the second ladder aren't any more difficult than the initial rungs, moving Yamada on to the Unstable Bridge. Barring the freak accidents Urushihara and Tomohiro Kawaguchi had while dismounting, this obstacle surprisingly has done next to nothing. Since its inception in SASUKE 23, it's taken out Rich King, the first competitor to attempt it, Brian Orosco, who was timing out anyways, and Jun Satō, who at the time was perennial Stage 2 fodder. Yamada makes his way along the easier, four-chained bridge with no problems, then gets ready for the transition. He swings back and forth, hopping his hands over and holding on to the plank. His pace on board 2 is a bit slower, but safe. He reaches the end and gets his momentum going for the dismount, even kicking off the landing mat to help him out. With 32 seconds left, he dismounts safely and moves on to the Balance Tank, an obstacle he still hasn't quite overcome mentally. Back in SASUKE 12, he had a very close call on it, he's watched some rather painful fails over the years, and given it took out Yamamoto and Hitoshi Kanno in their most recent attempts, it seems to have gotten harder too. Yamada steps on to the barrel, gets it rolling, and despite a scare midway through where his body started to lean back a bit, he was able to recover and make it across. However, there's only 18 seconds left now, time is very much a factor. Next is the Metal Spin, making its last ever appearance. It's taken out 6 competitors so far, including 3 Americans and Morimoto, but Yamada is very experienced on this obstacle, having attempted it 7 times with only one failure, back in SASUKE 17. He's learned from that failure and watching other competitors attempt it that this is a very tricky obstacle despite its simple concept, and that specific technique is needed, not just with his arms and legs, but his mind and eyes. Not only do you have to look forward to see where you're actually grabbing, but you have to look down at your run-up and prepare yourself to make sure you don't jump too early or too late. Yamada knows this all too well. Someone probably should've reminded him. Due to his low time, Yamada only looks forward before starting his run-up, never down. Because of this, he doesn't back up or get his feet into their usual starting position at all, he just takes off. You might think this won't matter, but if you've tried something a lot of times, you develop muscle memory. Yamada's trained his body to a certain rhythm here, with a specific amount of steps before the jump, and it's usually worked. This time though, it's one step too many. To the shock of literally everyone watching, Yamada places his left foot too far out on the plank, and because scientists have not yet figured out how to jump off air, this is problematic. Yamada doesn't even get to jump at all, slipping off and nearly backflopping into the cold waters below, bringing his 27th and seemingly final SASUKE attempt to an end nobody could've seen coming. The announcer is stunned, Nagano has his head in his hands, Urushihara's face looks similar to how it looked after Nagano's 24 fail. As for the recipient of said shock fail, he's just staring up at the untouched chains, his hands behind his head and a stunned smile, looking like he almost wants to laugh. He still isn't sure what actually happened, and wouldn't be until he watched the tournament on TV with the slo-mo replay. All he can do now is get out of the pool, and after his interview of him mostly thinking of what to possibly say to explain that fail, walk over to the All-Stars. K: ...I, I don't know. I don't know how, or what, or why. I can't explain that. N: We all have those moments, it's okay. Don't beat yourself up. T: Yeah, just ask Shingo-san, he'll give you a list! S: Okay, okay, let's all calm down here, haha. Seriously though, it happens. No worries. We were all just here to have fun anyway. And if you're gonna go out, make your last memory a stylish one. K: Yeah, fair enough. Good luck, Nagano-san. Hah... I can't believe that. AftermathThankfully, Nagano did clear, and ended up coming fifth place overall in the tournament, failing the transition to the smallest Ultimate Cliffhanger ledge. For the first time, three people did clear the obstacle, those being Hashimoto, Matachi, and Urushihara, the latter two of which would go on to clear the Third Stage while Hashimoto failed the new Chain See-Saw in his final Third Stage appearance. The new Final Stage was revealed to be a 20 meter rope climb, and while Matachi came up a meter or two short, Urushihara blew the stage away, achieving Kanzenseiha for a second time with 6.7 seconds left and ending SASUKE on seemingly the best note it possibly could, crowning it's first ever two time champion, resulting in a lot of tears and applause from the crowd. And then, after everything died down, the realisation set in, not just for Yamada, but for everyone else, that... That was it. 27 tournaments, 14 years and change, 2700 attempts, all but four of them ending in failure in some way, shape or form. Just as SASUKE was gaining popularity outside Japan, inside Japan, it was not just losing popularity, it was gone. Sure, the friendships would remain, and people still had their backyard courses, but for everyone who hadn't yet achieved Kanzenseiha, their goal was now dead. Everything they'd come to know and love about SASUKE, whether it be the chilling commentary from the announcers, watching the joke competitors wipe out in ways never before thought possible, seeing their training partners have success, whatever it was, it was dead. It was all dead. For about a year. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I really have to thank Higuchi for having no sense of safety, the HPA's landing gave me the perfect opportunity to make sure D.D. isn't in this timeline. Cheers, mate.
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zoran
Jessie Graff
Posts: 1,042
Member is Online
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Post by zoran on Feb 11, 2024 17:03:37 GMT -5
So I'm guessing by the last sentence Drew will be completely non existent, how is that going work for future tournaments in the early 30s where he had a significant impact like 32 and 33?
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Post by sasukewarrior333 on Feb 11, 2024 17:45:38 GMT -5
So I'm guessing by the last sentence Drew will be completely non existent, how is that going work for future tournaments in the early 30s where he had a significant impact like 32 and 33? Eh, it doesn't really make much of a difference IMO. 32 and 33 become simultaneously better and worse tournaments because Drew wasn't the best, but also because the results were even more underwhelming. Kinda hilarious to think Jun and Brent would do the best in 32 and Shunsuke the best in 33 lol. The ridiculous combo still gets abandoned in 35 because of Yusuke failing it. Aside from that, the clear numbers for 30-36 are all lowered slightly and a few fastest times are given to different people (SASUKE 34 and 36 Stage 1 goes to Dai Igarashi and Jun respectively and SASUKE 35 Stage 2 goes to Jun too)
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Feb 12, 2024 0:42:46 GMT -5
So I'm guessing by the last sentence Drew will be completely non existent, how is that going work for future tournaments in the early 30s where he had a significant impact like 32 and 33? Yeah, basically what sasukewarrior333 said. As for his numbers, they'll either be given to Kōji himself or the person that was either one number below or above Drew (depending once again on Kōji's number)
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Post by Homeslice on Feb 26, 2024 9:34:56 GMT -5
How about the infamous SASUKE 28?
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Feb 26, 2024 19:42:00 GMT -5
How about the infamous SASUKE 28? In the works right now!
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