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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on May 4, 2023 8:03:38 GMT -5
Alright I'm kinda interested by these now lol Let's keep going in order ig, Hatkun said 5 so I'm gonna say Sasuke 6? SASUKE 6After coming off his first ever First Stage failure the previous tournament, 26 year old firefighter Kōji Yamada looks to return to form in SASUKE 6. He is given #92 by the producers, right before fellow Gifu fireman Takeda, a trend that would continue in later tournaments. He is also given an interview before his run. Reporter: Yamada-san, have you been training for the Soritatsu Kabe? Kōji: Yes, I have. I didn't make the mistake I made a few years back and put all my training time into it, but I was able to build a replica in my spare time. I think I should have the technique now. R: We're looking forward to seeing it, Yamada-san. Do your best out there today! K: Will do. First Stage
The First Stage is unsurprisingly unchanged from the previous tournament after it knocked out 97 of 100 challengers, including Yamada himself. However, it doesn't seem to have helped the competitors much as only one man, gymnast Yoshiaki Hatakeda, has managed to hit the red button in time, and he only did so with less than three seconds despite leaping straight to the top of the Jump Hang. So, understandably, Yamada is a little concerned as he steps to the start line, but tries to shake the demons in his mind, as now, we'll cut to Furutachi for his introduction. Furutachi: Now, another challenger with great potential. Looking for revenge on the Soritatsu Kabe after being halted by it last time, this is a man who's made it to the Final Stage, it's time for #92, 26 year old Kōji Yamada! The starting sounds go off as Yamada runs up to the Maruta Nobori, once again having no trouble. Two quick jumps later and he's safely on top, but now the Rolling Maruta is next. This obstacle would later take out Yamamoto, SASUKE 5's only Third Stager, and it has already taken out Ōmori for a second time. Yamada wraps his limbs around the log and holds on for dear life as he pushes it forward and gets it going. The barrel spins one, two, three, four times, and Yamada can safely let go after dangling for a couple seconds. He climbs up to the Yureru Hashi, the only obstacle left that doesn't seem to pose any threats, as once again, it's only taken out one competitor today, 18 year old Munenori Seki. Yamada will not be its second victim as he easily crosses the bridge, hopping down to face the obstacle that has taken out 49 competitors so far, over half the field, the Jump Hang. Yamada takes a quick breath, sizes up the trampoline, then gets ready to challenge SASUKE's most lethal obstacle. He runs up to the trampoline, jumps onto it... ... And then, in one of the biggest shocks of SASUKE so far, Yamada's feet hit the front of the trampoline, giving him the height but not the distance, and Yamada can only try to make a desperate grab as he falls helplessly into Midoriyama's murky moat of defeat. The crowd is shocked, and Furutachi even more so, as a loud " DOUSHITANDA, YAMADA!" rings through everyone's ears. Yamada can only put his hands on his head in shock as he climbs out of the pit, and his fellow competitors come over to console him. He thanks them for their support and apologizes to the crowd before somewhat reluctantly heading to his interview. R: Yamada-san, you looked good until the trampoline, what happened? K: I just messed up, really. That's it. I started running a little further back from last time, I wanted to get more speed, and I didn't think about where I'd land. I'm so disappointed. R: I know, but we hope you won't give up. K: Of course not, I love SASUKE. Love the competitors, the challenges, the environment, everything. I'll be back. R: Glad to hear it, Yamada-san. Thank you for your time! K: Thank you. A still semi-shocked Yamada heads to the sidelines to watch his fellow competitors, and after four of the next seven clear, Yamada learns that he won't even be the most shocking Jump Hang fail of the tournament as reigning Grand Champion Kazuhiko Akiyama, in his first tournament back since his win, also flubbed the same obstacle and was sent packing by it. Right after however, the Second Stage would do absolutely zero damage for the first time ever, as five out of five cleared, but the Third Stage ended in tragic fashion. Katsumi Yamada ended up failing the Pipe Slider by falling off the side of the mat, one good swing away from being the first to reach the Final Stage. Despite the heartbreaks of SASUKE 6, Yamada and the other strong competitors will return with a vengeance in SASUKE 7, looking to finally challenge that elusive Final Stage.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on May 5, 2023 12:28:48 GMT -5
No apology needed. If you actually had him struggle on the Arm Bike, I would have complained about your lack of realism. To be honest, considering how rarely I contribute to these boards (my last post was July 2022, and I made a total of 4 posts that year), I'm actually slightly surprised you even remembered me. While I'm here, can I nominate Sasuke 18 please? I've always wondered how he would have done if he hadn't skipped that one. Honestly, I actually find your posts pretty solid, and I can relate to your inexplicable like of a bad obstacle, (hey Skywalk) so there's that. I also like your username, go Weegee. Anyway... SASUKE 18After a shocking failure on the Metal Spin the previous tournament, 33 year old Kōji Yamada returns to Midoriyama to take on an almost entirely redesigned course, thanks to Makoto Nagano's Kanzenseiha the previous tournament. Before the tournament even starts however, a 1200m race is held to determine start positions in honor of this new era of SASUKE, formally known as "Shin-SASUKE". RaceYamada chats with his fellow strong competitors about their strategies in the race, whether they want a high or a low number, and whether they'll go slow to conserve energy or not. Yamada says he plans on keeping a steady jog to not exhaust himself, but he doesn't want to go too slow as he doesn't want to be the first to try any of these new obstacles. His strategy works both ways, as he's only slightly winded by the end of the race, and also gets to the end fast enough to take the relatively high #89. First StageThe completely redesigned First Stage has taken out almost every competitor who's tried it so far, with only rookie Takamasa Nagasaki, motorcross star Yūji Washimi, and fellow fireman and All-Star Toshihiro Takeda clearing by the time Yamada's run arrives. Yamada is interviewed before stepping up to the Rope Glider about how he feels about the redesigned course. R: Yamada-san, what do you think about the renewal? Any obstacles that stand out? K: Yes, the Jumping Spider and Flying Chute, it seems like you need to be very precise on those. R: Do you think you'll be able to join Takeda-san? K: I think so. I know I have the ability to do all these obstacles, but I also know any one of them could take me out, so we'll see. R: Well, we wish you the best of luck! K: Thank you. As he steps up to grab hold of the new starting area, the Rope Glider, (which is so terrible I'm not even going to give it a description) Yamada is introduced by announcer Keisuke Hatsuta, and is given cheers of encouragement from the crowd and fellow competitors. The 130 second timer begins after the countdown beeps, and Yamada lifts his legs as he starts his challenge of Shin-SASUKE. After seeing 88 competitors try the obstacle, Yamada knows when to let go of the rope, and lands on the island safely. Next up, an obstacle that probably actually passed H&S tests, the Log Grip. Simple in design, tricky in execution, it requires plenty of finger strength to hold on through the two jolting drops in the track. Luckily for Yamada, he has finger strength in spades and has no issues hanging on to the log as he slides down to face his next challenge, the Pole Maze. Though not as much of a killer as most other obstacles, it can and will cause trouble for anyone that can't get a good rhythm or doesn't have the strength to move the pole. It would effectively time out Katsumi Yamada, and even future Grand Champion Yūsuke Morimoto in the next tournament, but here, nobody seems to be having much trouble with it and Yamada is no exception, as he navigates through the maze with ease to reach the First Stage's new trampoline area, the Jumping Spider. Not only would this obstacle take out the aforementioned Morimoto just two runs later, it would also go on to take out five SASUKE All-Stars and other strong competitors such as Naoya Tajima, Kenji Takahashi, and very nearly future champ Yuuji Urushihara too. However, Yamada is blessed with arguably the easiest version today, and he gets a solid bounce of the trampoline to firmly plant his limbs on the walls. Being a veteran of the Spider Walk, that section of the Jumping Spider causes no troubles as he dismounts and prepares to face the dreaded Half-Pipe Att- Oh, wait, that debuted in 19. What's the obstacle here? Ah... Right... Yeah, next up is the Bungee Bridge. Another obstacle where it's just like, what do you want from me here? What could possibly be said about this obstacle? You want a description of it? It's bungee cords. You want to know what damage it did? Well, too bad, it didn't do any. You want to know the technique? Walk. Okay, you want a detailed description of Yamada's attempt? Here you go. Step, step, trip, crawl. There. Happy now? Now we can get back on track, and JUST KIDDING HERE COMES THE GREAT WALL! I have absolutely no idea who designed this monstrosity. As if the regular Warped Wall isn't already dangerous, let's just add a rope that can easily be missed or slipped off of! And let's even thin the wall to increase the chance of falling on hard ground if you don't already hurt yourself by falling on the wall! Ugh... Let's just breeze by this too, I've already written enough. Yamada runs, grabs the rope, pulls himself up. There you go. Now, finally, next up is an actually good obstacle, (albeit a bit dangerous but it's the lesser of three evils here allow it) the Flying Chute. This obstacle, unlike the previous two, would actually go on to take out many strong competitors. Both Nagasaki brothers would fall here in SASUKE 19, and Nagano as well in one of the biggest shocks ever. This obstacle would also take out Yamada himself and Takahashi in SASUKE 20, as well as Naoki Iketani, Yamamoto, and Kenjiro Ishimaru in SASUKE 21. For now though, it hasn't done much aside from taking out Shinji Kobayashi, the first to attempt it, Yamamoto, and Hiromichi Satō. Yamada braces himself before sliding down the chute, reaching out for the rope and... ... Grabbing it. Yamada is safe soon after as he grabs hold of the cargo net, and now he need only worry about the timer, which still shows a very safe 37 seconds. He jogs over to the one obstacle that remains in the First Stage, the Tarzan Rope. Though even this still isn't exactly the same as Yamada now has to grab a cargo net known as the Rope Ladder and climb it instead of the rope itself. However, it still poses no issues to the fireman, as he's able to climb it with a very quick pace, and Yamada smiles as he walks over to the finish button and smacks it with 16.91 seconds remaining, moving on to the Second Stage for the fourth straight time. Second StageAs if the First Stage wasn't hard enough, the Second Stage has introduced the dreaded Salmon Ladder, which has taken out all three challengers that have attempted it so far. You know the Salmon Ladder, I'm burnt out, I don't need to give it an intro, let's just get to the run, shall we? Yamada gets advice from Takeda on how to approach the Salmon Ladder as he steps up to the first new obstacle, the Downhill Jump. Not much of an obstacle, again, not much to say about it. Yamada steps on the board as he's introduced and his run begins, and he keeps his balance before grabbing onto the rope, swinging back, then safely landing on the pad to take on the Salmon Ladder. Yamada's able to muscle his way up the first few levels, as one, two, three, he makes it. His arms straighten out a bit at the fourth jump, but he still gets up. After one more rung, it's time for the big gap, the final gap before basically being home free. Yamada bends his arms, swings back and forth like a pendulum to try and build up momentum... ... And then disaster strikes. Yamada's left hand peels off the bar as he's swinging back and his right hand follows suit immediately after, bringing Yamada's first Shin-SASUKE run to a watery end at the hands of the Salmon Ladder. His fellow competitors are shocked and disappointed, as is Yamada himself. He laughs it off as he climbs out of the murky pit to be interviewed. R: Yamada-san, you were so close, what happened? K: Just lost my grip. I tried swinging too much, I guess. Disappointing. R: It's unfortunate, but I assume we'll see you back here this fall? K: Yes you will. I'll be back with a vengeance. R: Glad to hear it, Yamada-san. Thank you for your time! K: Thank you. Yamada shares his experience with reigning champion Nagano, who along with Shunsuke Nagasaki and Takahashi, are able to defeat the Salmon Ladder and later the Second Stage. However, all three of their runs would come to a tragic end at the hands of the Shin-Cliffhanger, with the former being disqualified in controversial fashion and the latter two not being able to hold on to the third ledge. Nevertheless, they'll all be back, but they have no clue what will be waiting for them in SASUKE 19.
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hatkun
Nomura Masaki
Posts: 75
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Post by hatkun on May 9, 2023 15:02:15 GMT -5
The second era's been a bit rough to him so far. Don't go the way of Miura and Omori on us now, Kōji. Alright, Sasuke 7 time!
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on May 14, 2023 8:44:03 GMT -5
The second era's been a bit rough to him so far. Don't go the way of Miura and Omori on us now, Kōji. Alright, Sasuke 7 time! SASUKE 7After two heartbreaking defeats at the hands of the First Stage, 27 year old Kōji Yamada returns to SASUKE for the seventh time, looking to break through and clear for the first time since SASUKE 4. Due to his small losing streak, he is given the #81, just before Shane Kosugi. He takes a look at the Soritatsu Kabe as he is interviewed. R: Yamada-san, how much are you worried about the Jump Hang today? K: Honestly, not much. I've been training trampolines, I've been making sure I don't overshoot or anything, I'm just worried about that wall. R: Have you had time to practice that one? K: Not much. Really only with Katsumi-san. So that's probably gonna be the big issue today. R: Don't let it get the best of you, Yamada-san. We believe in you today! K: Thank you, I'll do my best. First StageNot unlike the two previous tournaments, there hasn't been much success before Yamada, as only three men, physics student Hironori Kuboki, sales driver Kenji Takahashi, and panel manufacturer Kōzo Akimoto have cleared before him, all of them doing so for the first (and for Kuboki and Akimoto, only) time. However, the tone of the First Stage is about to change. While #81 may seem like a middle of the road number, in the early days of SASUKE, it was also the number that was the first run announced by Ichiro Furutachi, who like always, gives a recap of the First Stage so far and a big introduction to Yamada. The crowd cheers as Yamada's name is shouted out by the always energetic Furutachi, and they have high hopes that Yamada can clear for the first time in three tournaments and be the fourth man through. The countdown beeps are heard and Yamada starts his quest for redemption, as he easily jumps up and over the Maruta Nobori for the seventh and final time. He wraps his limbs around the dreaded Rolling Maruta, which aside from a freak accident that happened to poor Masaharu Yanagawa earlier this tournament where the log rolled backwards, admittedly hasn't done much today. Yamada is not about to become the first strong victim of it, and after pushing off, he holds on tighter than a Gravity Falls fan holding on to false hope for a third season, and is able to survive the repeated spins of the log as it unsuccessfully tries to throw him into the swamp. After the fifth spin, he pauses to make sure he's over the mat and dismounts safely. After that is the Yureru Hashi, and thankfully I don't have to deal with stretching this obstacle out to a reasonable amount of words, as this will be its final tournament. Yamada crosses it like it wasn't even moving, and now steps down to face his new enemy, the Jump Hang. I'll let Furutachi take over this one, I don't think I can give you a vivid enough image. F: Now, he arrives to face his biggest challenge yet, the Jump Hang. It took him out last time, can he defeat it this time? How's your trampoline training gone, Yamada? Can he defeat his newfound nemesis?!... And soon after those words leave Furutachi's mouth, the crowd and Yamada can breathe a sigh of relief as the next two words are a triumphant "ITTA, TAKAI!" indicating Yamada's high jump as not only was he able to grab the net, but he grabbed very close to the top, grabbing the highest actual cargo net part. Yamada easily pulls himself up and tumbles down the net, and as he gets out, he prepares for his second great challenge. If you thought Yamada was done, well, you clearly haven't been reading these posts well enough... Because next up is the Soritatsu Kabe. This obstacle, just in this tournament, would later effectively time out Takeda and Katsumi, and has already defeated Eiichi Miura after he cleared the Jump Hang for his first and only time. There is some hope in the crowd as Yamada's SASUKE 5 performance shows he is capable of beating the beast, and he has time for two, maybe three tries as there are still 33 seconds on the clock. Yamada stares at the top ledge and briefly points to it, as if to say "I'm coming for you!", then runs up to the base of the wall, takes a few steps up, and leaps for what could possibly be the fate of his SASUKE career... ... And then, the crowd, Yamada's fellow competitors, and Furutachi erupt into joyful cheers as Yamada's right hand grabs hold of the top, and his strength lets him hang on for long enough to get his left hand up as he pulls himself over, this time with time on the clock. Having conquered the two biggest challenges in the First Stage, Yamada can't help but smile as he grabs hold of the Tarzan Rope. The crowd chant his name as he scales the Rope Climb in about six seconds, and he gleefully slams the red button afterwards, clearing the First Stage with the fastest time of the tournament, 17.29 seconds remaining, and advancing to the Second Stage for the first time in the 2000s. He of course is interviewed afterwards by a happy reporter. R: Yamada-san, congratulations! K: Thank you, thank you! R: You must be feeling very happy right now, right? K: Absolutely. Felt so good to finally succeed again... Phew. R: Were you nervous at all during your run? K: Yeah, admittedly. A little bit on the Soritatsu Kabe, but that's in the past now. R: Well, congratulations again, Yamada-san. We wish you luck in the Second Stage! K: Thank you. Second StageA total of nine men ended up clearing including Yamada, however none of them are prepared for the changes to the Second Stage. After a perfect clear rate in SASUKE 6, the stage introduced one new obstacle and one heavily modified obstacle. I'll cross those bridges when we get to them however. Yamada is seen on the sidelines as Kuboki steps up to start the Second Stage, analyzing the new challenges and discussing with Yamamoto about what the time limit might be, as they both think the stage is impossible to complete in 50 seconds. (spoiler alert: they're right) The time limit ends up being a relatively lenient 90 seconds, and that causes two out of three to clear before Yamada, with only Akimoto failing victim to the course so far. Yamada steps to the start line and Furutachi introduces him as the metal gates open, and Yamada sets his eyes on the new obstacle, the Chain Reaction. For those of you who haven't seen much SASUKE, (or just live under a rock) the Chain Reaction is arguably the greatest Second Stage opener of all time. Though it would only take out five competitors, it not only had the design factor going for it, but it also served as a very good time waster if a competitor wasn't able to clear it perfectly. Just like the other competitors, Yamada was unable to successfully transfer to the second chain on his first swing, having to waste a bit of time swinging back before successfully transitioning to chain two. He gets a good kick off the wall however, and smoothly slides down before dismounting safely and removing his gloves. The next "obstacle" is the Brick Climb, and just like the Hang Move and Arm Bike, there is absolutely nothing to say about this one. It's literally a rock wall. It's actually not even an obstacle according to TBS, (seriously, look it up) so why should I consider it one? Exactly. Moving on... Next up is the Spider Walk, however it's not the same obstacle Yamada faced in the first four tournaments. Instead of being a relatively straight line, the path forward is now in a candy cane shape, or an upside-down J. Yamada must first traverse up, then forwards briefly, then down until he can grab the bar and get to safety. He has no trouble with the first two parts, but begins to slow down as he starts the tricky descent that would later end Kane Kosugi's run. It's slow but steady for Yamada, and the lenient timer lets him take his time, as he makes no mistakes before exiting the Spider Walk and moving on to the back half of the stage. The Goren Hammer, as always, is not an issue, and neither is time as Yamada dives into the Gyakusō Conveyor with 23 seconds left. He can't help but smile as he knows he's all but assured himself a clear, and even does a small fist pump once he exits the tunnel and sees 18 seconds. He takes his time lifting the heavy walls, not wanting to exhaust himself before the grueling Third Stage, Still though, the klaxon barely has time to ring before Yamada steps on the red mat of victory, with 09.22 seconds remaining. He's through to the Third Stage, and he watches as Shane Kosugi, James Okada and Yamamoto join him, meaning six will take on Midoriyama's most grueling test. However shockingly, Kane Kosugi is not among them as he met a tragic defeat at the hands of the Spider Walk. Third StageNothing new has been introduced to the stage since SASUKE 5, however two obstacles are still new to Yamada. He watches as the redesigned Cliffhanger takes out both Kuboki and Takahashi before him, then must step up to the start line as Furutachi introduces him. He slaps on some chalk to help his grip before reaching out to begin his challenge of the Third Stage, starting with the Propeller Untei. Thankfully, I don't have to deal with this obstacle for too much longer, because it is incredibly boring. Yamada transfers to the second propeller, then the third, then dismounts. That's always the case. Can I move on with my life now please? Thank you. Next up however, is an actually challenging obstacle, and the first of the two new to Yamada, the Body Prop. This obstacle would later take out every All-Star except Nagano and Katsumi, and other strong contenders such as Iketani, Masaaki Kobayashi, and Shane Kosugi, and even Yamada himself in SASUKE 11. Yamada doesn't know how to approach this obstacle aside from what little info he got from seeing others try it. Nevertheless, he puts his limbs into position and starts moving along, keeping a good rhythm. Reaching out across the gaps, Yamada starts to get a little shaky, but after about a minute of struggle and holding himself up, Yamada is able to breathe a sigh of relief as he can safely stand on the dismount platform. The first true challenge has been vanquished. After Yamada easily traverses the track of the Arm Bike, next up comes his biggest test, the Cliffhanger. After Akiyama's win, it became more difficult with a gap that competitors must now ascend if they want to succeed. Yamada takes some time to size up the obstacle that bested him in SASUKE 4, and after putting chalk on, he starts his attack. Having trained specifically for the Cliffhanger, Yamada has no issue with the first two ledges, moving along them with relative ease albeit with a slight pause on the transfer. Now however, the ascent. The crowd and fellow competitors watch as Yamada reaches his right hand up, and is able to grab hold of the ledge. He reaches up with his left hand... ... Sadly, Yamada makes a fatal error and ends up placing his left hand on top of his right, and he can't hold himself up long enough to recover as the fireman's flame is extinguished by Midoriyama's waters. For the second time, Yamada has fallen victim to the heart and soul of SASUKE. He sighs as he climbs out of the water, then apologises to his fellow competitors before going over to be interviewed. R: Yamada-san, what went wrong? You looked like you were about to make it! K: I just made a silly error, that's all. I didn't think about my right hand needing to be further over. R: Would you like to come back again? K: Of course, I have a great time here. I'll come back as many times as I can. R: Great to hear, Yamada-san. Take care, thank you for joining us again! K: Thank you, take care. You all know the rest of SASUKE 7, including the ending that is too sad for me to actually type out. However, on a positive side, what Yamada doesn't know is that that performance was enough for the producers, who have now officially made him a SASUKE All-Star along with Katsumi, Shingo, Akiyama, both Kosugis and Ōmori, however the latter three would soon retire. Yamada also doesn't know however, that for the first real time, competitors will be facing more than just the obstacles in SASUKE 8...
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hatkun
Nomura Masaki
Posts: 75
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Post by hatkun on May 14, 2023 15:00:36 GMT -5
Thank you for sparing me the tragedy of Sasuke 7’s ending. That still hurts, man. But back on topic, way to bounce back, Kōji. Now let’s see how the newest Sasuke All-Star handles the…unique conditions of Sasuke 8.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on May 16, 2023 19:59:33 GMT -5
Thank you for sparing me the tragedy of Sasuke 7’s ending. That still hurts, man. But back on topic, way to bounce back, Kōji. Now let’s see how the newest Sasuke All-Star handles the…unique conditions of Sasuke 8. SASUKE 8
Coming off a third place run in SASUKE 7, and having been officially inducted in the club of SASUKE All-Stars, 27 year old fireman Kōji Yamada has plenty to be excited about for SASUKE 8, as only two new obstacles have been introduced to the course, so many expect him and the other Third Stagers from SASUKE 7 to potentially go all the way today. Due to this potential, he is given the #96. However, what nobody could have foreseen is that there would be more than just obstacles to deal with today. Rain has covered the challenges of Midoriyama from the top of the Tsuna Nobori to the bottom of the Spider Walk. The show must go on though, and Yamada and the other 99 challengers must now deal with the elements as well as the obstacles. Before the tournament begins, Yamada is seen with fellow All-Stars Yamamoto and Akiyama, talking about how the rain will affect the course. They're shown expressing concern about the Soritatsu Kabe, which is hard enough in perfect condition let alone wet, and the Rolling Maruta as the rain might make someone's hands slippery and make them lose their grip. Yamada is also interviewed right after Yamamoto, about if he thinks he's prepared. R: Yamada-san, how do you feel about the conditions today? K: I mean, it's gonna make it harder for sure, but I don't have too many worries. I think the rain provides a bigger mental challenge than physical, you can't let it shake your confidence. R: Well, don't let it get to you, Yamada-san. We wish you the best of luck! Yamada says his thanks and heads over to the sidelines as Hatsuta gets the tournament going and the first runner, Shinichi Ebine, gets ready. First Stage
The combination of rain and obstacles have absolutely decimated the field so far, as only six out of 95 have cleared before Yamada. Among them are action star Kane Kosugi, Bulgarian Olympian Jordan Jovtchev, who actually cleared with literally no time to spare, and the other Gifu fireman Takeda, who would himself become an All-Star after this tournament. However, many strong competitors have also been defeated by Midoriyama so far, including Shane Kosugi, Kuboki, Miura for the fourth straight time, and some dude named Nagano that won't at all be important to SASUKE. Yamada is not fazed however. He knows that his challenge is not affected by those around him, only him alone. He steps up to the start line as his new theme music plays for the first time, cementing his status as a worthy SASUKE All-Star, and he is introduced by the always descriptive Ichiro Furutachi. F: Now, next up is another strong contender. This is a man who has a new title to uphold, a man who's revived his SASUKE career, a man who has previously reached the Final Stage and who's only goal left is to conquer it! He's used to working with hot flames, but how will he fare in the cold rain today? Looking to be the seventh clear, please welcome our newest SASUKE All-Star, it's Gifu firefighter Kōji Yamada, 27 years old! The crowd cheers and his fellow All-Stars shout words of encouragement as Yamada begins his quest for Kanzenseiha. First up is one of the two new obstacles, the Godantobi. Simple in concept, this obstacle only lasted four tournaments, but paved way for the standard of first obstacles for years to come. Even in its short span, it did damage, taking out Kuboki in this tournament, as well as Akiyama in SASUKE 9, arguably a top 3 shock in SASUKE history. It will take out 50 competitors this tournament, but Yamada will not be one of them as he's able to avoid making a mistake and after four hops, reaches the other side to challenge a familiar foe, the Rolling Maruta. Having cleared it five times before, Yamada does exactly what is expected of him and hangs on as the log rolls down the chute, and safely dismounts to mark off another obstacle done. The next challenge is the second and final new obstacle, the Ōdama, or Big Boulder as it's known elsewhere. And dear reader, if I can be honest with you, I thought for a good 45 minutes trying to come up with anything to say about this obstacle, and I really just can't. Other than taking out Shane Kosugi in SK9, this obstacle is more useless than the 9 button on a microwave. (seriously, who here has ever pressed the 9? It's never used.) It's literally just a thing that you use to cross a gap. You run on the boulder for a bit, then jump to the landing platform. That's what everyone does, that's what Yamada does. Can we move on now? Thank you. Next is a simple but deadly obstacle, the Jump Hang. Though it took Yamada out in SASUKE 6, he's been training a lot for it and this time is able to grab the net. He takes the safe route, going over the top of the net, and rolls down to challenge the other First Stage obstacle that has defeated him, the Soritatsu Kabe. He and everyone watching knows it won't be easy, but Yamada must try anyway. With 32 seconds on the clock, he takes his first go at the wall, reaches up... And misses, sliding back down as the crowd collectively gasps. He regroups and takes a breath before he goes for his second attempt... Another miss! The crowd and Furutachi are stunned as the clock goes under 20 seconds, and Yamada takes a third attempt at the wall... ... And this time, he's able to grab the top and pull himself up, but he knows there is no time to waste. Everyone knows this will be yet another close call, seemingly a theme of SASUKE 8. However, what we don't know is whether the demons or angels of Midoriyama are with Yamada today. I'll now turn it over to Furutachi for the play-by-play, as I don't think my writing can paint a picture well enough. "His third try, he jumps again and makes it! He's up and over! But there's now only 11 seconds, Yamada has to hurry! Go on, Yamada! Make the firefighters watching proud! Seven seconds as he starts the Rope Climb! He goes up, and up, but can he make it? Can you show us the push you need, Yamada? Just two seconds! One second...!" And then the crowd, Yamada, and even Furutachi himself go into a collective silence. Yamada dove and hit the button, but as the lack of smoke and moving yellow gates will tell you, too late. Like others before and after, Yamada has experienced the pain of a close miss. "He was out by 0.2 seconds!", Furutachi shouts as Yamada collapses onto his back. Nobody can believe it, he can't believe it. It takes a minute for Yamada to even stand up before he walks over to be interviewed. R: Yamada-san, so close, I'm so sorry! What went wrong for you? K: I just didn't have my technique, I guess. I don't wanna blame the rain, it didn't feel wet. I don't know, I guess I just messed up. R: Will you be back to avenge this defeat? K: Of course, no way I'm going out like that. I know I can do this. I know I can go all the way. R: We hope you're right, Yamada-san. Thank you again for coming out! K: Thank you. Turns out, Yamada wouldn't be the only close timeout, as fellow All-Star Yamamoto met almost the same fate on the Rope Climb soon after. However, there was success to be had as Jordan and Kane would go on to make the Final Stage, and again I'll spare the tragic ending. However, SASUKE 9 will be a normal tournament, just Yamada vs. Midoriyama. And it will be one that possibly changed the course of SASUKE and Ninja as a whole forever.
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hatkun
Nomura Masaki
Posts: 75
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Post by hatkun on May 16, 2023 20:07:29 GMT -5
Heartbreaking stuff. I think there’s something about your first tournament as an All-Star that just curses you, it even happened to that Nagano guy in 10. But yeah, with that teaser, there is no way we can do anything other than march on to Sasuke 9. Show us what you’ve got, Yamada-San!
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on May 16, 2023 20:36:27 GMT -5
Heartbreaking stuff. I think there’s something about your first tournament as an All-Star that just curses you, it even happened to that Nagano guy in 10. But yeah, with that teaser, there is no way we can do anything other than march on to Sasuke 9. Show us what you’ve got, Yamada-San! Just for the record, SK9 isn't gonna change SASUKE forever cause of Yamada. I'm saying that cause of that Nagano guy's breakout and him changing SASUKE. Didn't mean to get anyone's hopes up lol.
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hatkun
Nomura Masaki
Posts: 75
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Post by hatkun on May 16, 2023 21:14:50 GMT -5
Just for the record, SK9 isn't gonna change SASUKE forever cause of Yamada. I'm saying that cause of that Nagano guy's breakout and him changing SASUKE. Didn't mean to get anyone's hopes up lol. Oops, my bad . Thanks for clearing that up though, and I’ll stick with Sasuke 9 as my choice aha
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on May 25, 2023 20:57:12 GMT -5
Apologies for the delay, I swear I haven't forgotten about this. I've just been burnt out with work and other stuff. I'm writing SK23 now and I'll get to 9 soon.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on May 28, 2023 11:28:37 GMT -5
Sasuke 23, will he join the All-Stars and Kongu in their comeback Before any footage of the tournament is even shown, the five competing SASUKE All-Stars are shown opposite the new group of stars, the Shin Sedai. Only two men, 24 year old Hitoshi Kanno, and 31 year old shoe salesman Yuuji Urushihara, are in it right now, but this group would come to rival the All-Stars and one day surpass them. People like Jun Satō, Ryo Matachi, and Kazuma Asa would all have later success, but for now, it seemed like a five on two battle. However, with the two Shin Sedai having the two best performances in SASUKE 22, the All-Stars were really going to have to step up their game. And man, did they ever. SASUKE 23After a bloodbath of a tournament in SASUKE 22, 35 year old Kōji Yamada has one goal on his mind: To let the fans know the All-Stars still had it. He was competing for more than himself now, his entire group needs the confidence boost as not only have Katsumi, Akiyama and Yamamoto not cleared in Shin-SASUKE yet, but even Nagano, Takeda and Yamada himself have had their fair share of struggles. He's soon interviewed about the battle of the generations that TBS tried so hard to market this tournament. R: Yamada-san, do you think the All-Stars can keep up with the new rising generation? K: I think so, especially Nagano-san. I think he'll do well, but I wouldn't be surprised to see both him and Urushihara-san win. R: So are you having a competition within a competition here of sorts? K: Maybe a little friendly rivalry, but really the competition's against the obstacles. Whoever comes out on top, congratulations to them. R: Well, go out there and beat them then, Yamada-san. Best of luck today! Yamada walks off to go get his number, which ends up being #91. He'll be the second All-Star to run after Katsumi, (and let's be real, the first All-Star with any chance whatsoever) so the pressure will be on. Though pressure has never been an issue for him, given he works in a field where lives are at stake. He'll do what he does every time, tackle the obstacles one by one and do his best. First StageUnlike pretty much every tournament beforehand, success has come before Yamada's run, as 8 people have cleared, the most people Yamada got to watch clear before him since SASUKE 16, and excluding that, since SASUKE 4. However, Katsumi was not among them as he was defeated by the Slider Jump, which seemed to be the new big killer in the First Stage as it took out many strong competitors, including Nagano, last tournament. He walks to the start line as Leszek Blanik starts his run, and after the latter's fail, a VTR is shown for Yamada. It shows Yamada's Shin-Cliffhanger fail from 21, as well as his all-cut declaration to Nagano afterwards, where he stated if he ever made it back to the Third Stage, he was going to clear it even if it broke his arm. It also shows footage of all his fellow All-Stars failing in 22, as well as Katsumi's fail just 18 runs ago. At the bottom of the screen is text that reads "オールスター復活 " or "All-Star Revival", hinting at the comebacks Takeda, Shingo and Nagano would have this very tournament. The VTR ends after Yamada is shown training the Shin-Cliffhanger, and announcer Wataru Ogasawara introduces Yamada. Since he's not Furutachi, I don't really know what he'd say, and it'd probably be some backhanded insult anyway, so let's get to the run, shall we? After hearing the start signal, Yamada begins his assault on the First Stage, starting with a new area right away, the Jyūnidantobi. Not too much to say about this obstacle, except that it almost took Hoshan's nose clean off earlier this tournament. It's your typical first obstacle, takes out all the celebs and joke competitors, but doesn't do any damage to the strong parts of the field. Yamada is no exception to this rule, and clears with ease, moving on to face another new area, the Curtain Slider. Though a decent obstacle, and one that had potential, it only lasted one tournament and did almost no notable damage. Unlike the other Yamada, Kōji has no trouble with it and glides effortlessly across to face his first familiar foe, the Log Grip. Thank goodness for this obstacle, as I finally don't have to introduce it. Again, it hasn't done much aside from take out a few guys who are just generally athletic such as Junichi Miyashita this tournament, and Yamada like usual hangs on through the drops. However, the next obstacle is much more deadly and even took out Takeda and Katsumi the previous tournament, the Jumping Spider. Feared since SASUKE 18, it's taken out every All-Star except Akiyama, Nagano and Yamada himself so far, along with many other promising contenders. Yamada takes a couple seconds to catch his breath and size up the mini-tramp, then runs up, jumps and... Sticks the landing, to the relief of the crowd and his fellow All-Stars. He doesn't make the same mistake Hiromichi Satō did later in the tournament and keeps himself on the walls, dismounting safely soon after and preparing to face the Half-Pipe Attack. Although it caused one of the most iconic fails in SASUKE history the previous tournament, overall it hasn't done much outside of SASUKE 20, aside from taking out some Morimoto dude, but he was 15 and he's probably not that good. However, Yamada seemed to have been born holding a rope, and all he needs to do is grab it. He takes a run up and he's able to, and is even able to dismount in one swing as a bonus. But next up comes the obstacle that essentially ended Katsumi's run and so many others before him, the Soritatsu Kabe. I'm not gonna bother giving this one a whole backstory again, you know it and you're probably getting tired of me acing like you don't. That's fair. Yamada takes a run at the monstrous wall, reaches for the top, but surprisingly misses! He slides back down as the camera cuts to the other All-Stars, who have a bit of a surprised/worried look. Turns out, they need not worry, as Yamada is able to grab hold of the top and pull himself up on his second try. Now, the big killer of the previous tournament, the Slider Jump. Nobody knows it yet, but it would later cause arguably the biggest controversy in SASUKE history with its malfunction during Nagano's run. For now though, it works fine as Yamada slides down the track. He has the time, all he needs to do is make the jump, the crowd holds their breath as he lets go of the silver bar, and... ... They can safely breathe again soon after, as Yamada grabs high on the cargo net and is able to roll over and out with minimal struggles. He sees a very comfortable 32 seconds, and having previously scaled the Rope Ladder in under ten seconds, everyone knows he's through. He makes his climb, but before pressing the red button, he shouts out "YAMAMOTO!" in encouragement to Shingo Yamamoto, the next All-Star to run. He slams the button with 17.39 seconds left, and a graphic appears showing 1/2 on the All-Stars. Yamada is again through to Stage 2, and can't hide the proud smile on his face as he slides down the pole and is promptly interviewed. R: Yamada-san, very nice job! K: Thank you, thank you. R: I noticed you shouting to Yamamoto-san, correct? K: Yeah, I'd love to see him make it back to the Second Stage. I know he's capable. R: Well, go cheer him on, Yamada-san. Congratulations! K: Thanks! Turns out, Yamamoto would clear, as would 8 of the last 9 including SASUKE 22 finalist Urushihara, All-Stars Takeda, Nagano and the aforementioned Yamamoto, and Levi Meeuwenberg, who set a Shin-SASUKE speed record with 29.21 seconds remaining. He also set a SASUKE record for showboating! Isn't that crazy? Second StageThings don't go too well in the Second Stage however, as the Salmon Ladder is back to its old tricks and has taken out several young competitors and future stars like Jun Satō and Naoya Tajima. Only Kenji "Kong" Takahashi has cleared so far, and now it's Yamada's turn. He gets words of encouragement from his fellow All-Stars, as for the first time since 2006, they have four men in the Second Stage. Yamada's theme plays as the metal gates open and Fumiyasu Satō introduces the determined 35 year old, and he takes a deep breath before taking off down the Downhill Jump. Being a veteran of this obstacle and attempting it more than most, he has no problem with it and easily sticks the landing. Next however, comes the tricky part, the dreaded Salmon Ladder. Having newfound confidence after previously besting this obstacle, Yamada grips the bar and starts powering his way up. One, two, three, the bar goes up the rungs at a pretty steady pace, with Yamada taking only a second or two in between. But then, at the fourth level, the crowd gets a bit of a scare as the bar ends up slanted, and it takes Yamada a bit to recover. Yamada makes the fifth jump, but now comes the final one. Yamada has been felled here twice previously, and a misstep essentially ended his run back in SASUKE 19. He takes a breath, pulls the bar up, and... He makes it! One final hop over and he safely slides down the abomination known as the Stick Slider, to a new obstacle, the Unstable Bridge. Simple in design, but deadly in execution, this obstacle would later take out Urushihara, as well as future finalist Tomohiro Kawaguchi in the next tournament, and the aforementioned Satō in SASUKE 25. Yamada can only approach it as Takahashi did, and give it his best effort. Steadily but slowly, he moves along the board, making sure not to tip it to one side. He gets to the very end, jumps for the second board and hooks his hands on, but he's not out of the woods yet. The dismount is always tricky, and Yamada has to take an extra swing before he can make the dismount. At this point, the clock is down to just 17 seconds, and Yamada knows he needs to hurry. Next up is the Metal Spin, which took him out in SASUKE 17 and is never a gimme. He runs up, takes a leap for the chain... And this time, he's able to hang on, but it's not over yet! As he lands, the clock ticks to 11 seconds and Yamada needs to rush through the Wall Lifting. I'll now cut to our friendly neighborhood announcer, Fumiyasu Satō, for the play-by-play. S: The 30 kilo wall isn't a problem, but time is as there's now 8 seconds! Hurry, Yamada! 40 kilos, he dives under! He strains at the 50 kilo wall, can he get under? Two seconds, he dives and he hits the button!! He's done it, with just 00.85 seconds remaining, Yamada advances to the Third Stage by the slimmest of margins! And while that would unsurprisingly be the slowest clear time of the day, Yamada doesn't care about that, he's just happy to be through to the Third Stage. He is immediately congratulated by his fellow All-Stars, especially Takeda. Turns out, they would all follow in Yamada's footsteps as Yamamoto, Takeda and Nagano all advanced to the Third Stage too, along with fellow elder statesman Yoshiyuki Okuyama, American Levi Meeuwenberg, and Shin Sedai member Hitoshi Kanno. But as some dude from the 1600s probably said, "One's greatest challenge is never behind them." The Third Stage is as brutal as ever, and it'll take a lot more to get through than the previous two hurdles. Third StageWith nearly the same amount of people attempting the stage as the last four tournaments combined, it seemed to be all but guaranteed that there would be some success. However, this nearly came right away as Takahashi cleared the Shin-Cliffhanger using a beautiful strategy that I would end up writing a whole 'nother post about if I went on about it any longer, and made it to the final obstacle, the Gliding Ring, only to come up short. It did instill some hope in the remaining seven challengers however, and Yamada will be the first to try to replicate his success. He is seen talking to Nagano about the Shin-Cliffhanger just before his run, and once their strategies are clear, he steps up to the start line and prepares to challenge the beast. ... Did you hear that? It's the fourth wall breaking. Yes, dear reader, I need to talk with you. You know I try my best to add in every last smidge of detail that I can with these runs, because I want you to have a good experience and be able to follow our favourite, or at least second-favourite Gifu firefighter on his quest. I want you to be able to feel like you're there. I care about you, I care about your entertainment, I care about your appreciation for this uh, series, we'll call it. However, I hope you can care about me here as well. Because I, quite frankly, underestimated how hard this was. Writing every little detail about every little obstacle aside from ones that are unanimously considered terrible, it takes a lot out of a person. I've been writing and coming up with details for SASUKE 23 for the better part of two weeks now, and I need to give myself some slack.
So, my friend, I hope you can give me some slack too. I present my case for what I'm about to do. I plan on cutting straight to the Shin-Cliffhanger. There doesn't seem to be a point on me writing on any of the first three obstacles when the only fails on them were a freak accident and from someone who clearly wasn't cut out for the Third Stage. It would save me a lot of time, it would save you from reading through stuff you already knew was going to happen. I hope you understand and can forgive me. I'll try not to do this again. Thank you, kind reader.... The other All-Stars can only look on as Yamada prepares to start the Shin-Cliffhanger, which has defeated him before. However, with the recent success on it from Takahashi, there is hope in the air. After chalking up and resting for as long as he can, Yamada begins his challenge of the heart and soul of SASUKE. The first two ledges are not an issue for the fireman, nor would they be for anybody not named Levi. The jump is next however, and Yamada must build up momentum. He swings his body side to side, once, then twice, then the crowd and fellow competitors watch as Yamada's hands start moving to the third and final ledge... And I don't think I need to tell you what happened, you can just listen to the cheers and claps. "Yamada has done it, he's slain the Shin-Cliffhanger!" screams Ogasawara, and Yamada can breathe a sigh of relief. He isn't done yet though, the last four obstacles are new to him sans the Jumping Bars, and even those took him out back in SASUKE 15. However, that was when there was six. There are now only four, and nobody has been felled by them since Yamada himself. After taking his thirty seconds, he jumps onto the first bar with a determined look. He swings back, then forth, then jumps to bar 2 and makes it! Same story for bar 3, and 4, as Yamada has beaten the Jumping Bars too! Next up though, is a big test, the Hang Climbing. This can make or break a run. Spend too much time on it and you'll either fall like Takeda has in the past, or be too exhausted to continue like Takeda... Well, you know. There isn't a rest point either, Yamada must charge in headfirst, and he does. Thankfully though, unlike Takeda in 21, he's had the benefit of seeing others attempt it and knows the route. Looking up to make sure he doesn't miss, Yamada steadily ascends the angled board rock by rock, and looks to be making good progress towards the top. He starts to slow down at the top, but only a little, and he's still able to transfer his hands to the Spider Flip! Yamada has reached the penultimate obstacle of Stage 3, and no matter what happens, this will be his best performance since 2005. He wants more though. His climb along the bottom of the Spider Flip is slow but steady, and now comes the tricky part, hoisting himself up. There's a very noticeable grimace on Yamada's face as he hooks his hands around the sides of the wooden lifeline, and the cheers and yells from the crowd almost overlap Ogasawara's commentary at this point. Inch by inch, Yamada strains to pull himself up, until he finally gets his legs up and can stand safely at the top of the Third Stage's most grueling test. He breathes heavily and shakes his arms out one by one, trying to make sure any remaining energy he has goes into this run. "He can't fail now!", says Ogasawara. But as we'll soon see from Okuyama and Takeda, he absolutely can. The two meter jump is way harder than it looks, and after resting for a bit, Yamada must attempt it. He takes a look at the second board, bounces up and down a couple times, then leaps out to his destiny. . .. ... Yamamoto and Takeda practically jump out of their seats as Yamada latches on to the second board, and is able to hang on safely! The transfer to the green resting bar is successful, and Yamada now only has one challenge left, the deceivingly tricky Gliding Ring. Yamada can almost feel his fellow All-Stars behind him, and he can certainly see the gateway to the Final Stage in front of him. Yamada takes hold of the ring after thirty seconds, and now, I'll cut again to Ogasawara as he announces Yamada's biggest hurdle yet. O: And off Yamada goes on the Gliding Ring! He slides down and now he must keep the ring in place as he prepares to jump! He just saw Kongu go down here, he can't make the same mistake! He swings back again, building momentum! Can he make it to the Final Stage for the first time in a decade?! He jumps...!!! ... And he makes it! Yamada lands safely on the red mat of glory and lets out an almost feral scream as the smoke goes off, Yamada's triumphant clear music plays (AN: Add your own theme here, I feel that allows you to create the vibe you want) and he pounds the mat with pure joy! The first of the All-Stars are through to the Final Stage, and the moment Yamada steps down, he is swarmed by Yamamoto, Takeda and Nagano, who all feel Yamada's joy, he's just made it to the Final Stage after not having done so since we switched the first number of the year. They give him a well-earned congratulations, and as soon as they're done, a very happy reporter comes over to interview Yamada. R: Yamada-san, congratulations!! How happy are you feeling right now? K: I can't even explain it. I never thought I'd get back here, I never did, it feels... It's surreal. R: What were you thinking on the Gliding Ring? K: Just one thought and that's "Don't let go too early". I was so scared, I thought the pressure would get to me. R: Well, we hope it doesn't in the Final Stage, Yamada-san! Just one more challenge for you! K: I know, I'll do my best on it. Yamada won't be alone in his challenge, as Kanno and Nagano both clear behind him. He will however, be the first to take on the tower. Although it may seem like an easy win given his profession and the fact that y'know, he literally saves lives by climbing ladders and ropes, what you may not know is that the G-Rope, the final obstacle, is not a normal rope. It is a bungee rope, which is hard enough to climb when you're not exhausted, but couple that with the effort Yamada just put in on the Third Stage and it'll be a tough task, but one Yamada will still do his best on. FINAL STAGEYamada is seen talking with his fellow finalists and Urushihara, the only man with experience on this stage so far. What they don't know however, is that the timer has been lowered by five seconds, from 45 to 40. Yamada would find that out soon after his conversation is done, as once 40'00" flashes on the timer, Yamada and Nagano both look at each other with a "That's not right..." look. Nothing they can do about it though, the Final Stage is about to start and Yamada will be the first to try it. He straps into his safety harness, and a VTR is shown of his previous Final Stage defeat, along with all his Third Stage failures since then. And for the rest of his run, we go to Ogasawara. O: So, we have arrived at the Final Stage. Out of 100 determined men and women, only three have made it here. The 35 year old Yamada, the 24 year old Kanno, and the 37 year old Nagano. All of them have not been here yet, to take on the challenge Urushihara failed last tournament. And now, the first challenger steps up to the plate. This is a man who's competed in SASUKE since 1997 and has been to the tower once before, in the spring of 1999. It's one of a very strong duo of Gifu firemen, it's 35 year old Kōji Yamada. He straps into his harness and takes a look up at his goal. It's just 23 meters above him, but it seems like 230 meters when you're at the base of Midoriyama. He must ascend this final stage if he wants to become a Grand Champion. Can you do it, Yamada? Can you make the All-Stars proud?! boom...boom...BOOM!!!!O: Yamada's off on his second battle with Midoriyama's tower! Up the Heavenly Ladder with a good pace, he's quickly to the five meter mark! Oh, a slight stumble, but he recovers and shows no signs of slowing down and seems to be hovering up as he reaches ten meters! But now comes the transfer to the G-Rope, he has 24 seconds to climb it as he hooks his legs around! Can he win his fight with fatigue? 20 seconds! Yamada has the pace, but he needs to keep it! Can he become our third Grand Champion?! He only has five meters to go, but ten seconds is all that remains! He's slowing down, can he find that final burst of energy?! He can see the goal, but the clock is merciless! Hurry, Yamada! He's right there! NO!! Oh, he couldn't have been more than a meter away, but time is up and Yamada has been defeated by the brutal metal menace! Indeed, Yamada was only the better part of 50 centimeters short of the button when time ran out, and he can only pull himself up and stare at the button, knowing he just missed what may have been his last chance. He sighs and looks at the floor in a mixture of disgust and shock. He never thought his stamina would betray him on a rope climb, but alas, the unforeseen is the biggest enemy. Yamada collects himself for an interview, and admittedly, one he understandably does not really want to do at the moment. R: Yamada-san, you were so, so close, I'm so sorry! What happened? K: I just, my arms started getting so weak. You know, I kept trying to get that last reserve of strength, but there wasn't one. I thought my stamina was up to par, but I guess I was wrong. R: Keep on training, Yamada-san, never give up! K: Yeah, I have to. If something needs work, I'm gonna work on it. R: Anything else you'd like to say? K: Just want to wish Kanno-san and Nagano-san luck. After descending the tower, Yamada shares his experience with the fellow Finalists, who would both fall at the hands of the G-Rope, with Nagano in particular coming even closer than Yamada. A tragic ending once again, but this tournament did at least show that the All-Stars are nowhere near done. Now there's one thing left for Yamada to do in SASUKE 24, and that's to prove his return wasn't a fluke.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Jun 14, 2023 18:33:40 GMT -5
Heartbreaking stuff. I think there’s something about your first tournament as an All-Star that just curses you, it even happened to that Nagano guy in 10. But yeah, with that teaser, there is no way we can do anything other than march on to Sasuke 9. Show us what you’ve got, Yamada-San! Whew, I'm actually finally working on this! I greatly apologize for the waits, I've been working more recently and just haven't been on SMF too much in general, but I'll try and get back to this. So here we go! SASUKE 9After what can only be considered a heartbreak in SASUKE 8, where he missed clearing the First Stage by less than half, nay, less than a third of a second, 28 year old fireman Kōji Yamada is back for SASUKE's ninth tournament, with nothing but Kanzenseiha on his mind after seeing the previous Final Stage failures of Kane Kosugi and Jordan Jovtchev, although neither would compete in this tournament. He is given the #96 thanks mainly to his SASUKE 7 performance, but is still an All-Star nonetheless and is determined to uphold that title. Before the tournament starts, he gets an interview about what he's done since the last tournament. R: Yamada-san, I see you've been training hard, you look very fit today! K: I have, I've been training, working general fitness... I'm actually down to just three percent body fat now. R: Three percent?! K: Yes, and I intend to keep it like that, I've felt so much better in training since then. Hoping that holds on the course. R: Well, we hope so too, Yamada-san, good luck! Yamada and the other 99 challengers already have had better luck than in SASUKE 8, as there is no rain this time, it'll just be person v. course. Everyone is thinking the same thing, that it's now a fair battle and they can show what they're made of. First Stage
In what seems to be par for the course in this era so far, the First Stage has completely decimated the field, as only four men, 24 year old comedian Kinnikun Nakayama, 29 year old fisherman Makoto Nagano, 28 year old Olympian Daisuke Nakata, and 29 year old celebrity athlete Naoki Iketani, have cleared so far. However, the tide is about to change, as the last five challengers will all be SASUKE All-Stars, starting with Yamada and ending with Grand Champion Akiyama. Yamada's theme plays as he walks up to the start line and is introduced by Furutachi. He gives a thumbs-up to the other All-Stars and states that he's confident, then his run starts. Nothing at all has changed about the First Stage this tournament aside from the weather, so Yamada knows all of these obstacles and has attempted them firsthand, starting with the Godantobi. You all know what happened later this tournament with this obstacle, I won't pretend you don't. Yamada though, doesn't make the same mistake Akiyama would soon do and hops across the steps with ease, safely getting to the other side and climbing up to an old friend, the Rolling Maruta. Since SASUKE 6, it hasn't done much and has mainly taken out competitors who didn't have much of a chance anyway, and that trend would stay until SASUKE 12 when Nakata failed it. As you might have inferred from the previous sentence, Yamada has no issue holding on through the spins and dismounts, climbing up again to face the Ōdama, which quite frankly is better off in a Wipeout course. Yes, Shane Kosugi failed it just five runs earlier in what would be his final attempt, I know, and I did have to mention it for the sake of storytelling. But give him 99 more attempts on it and he beats it all 99. It was a total fluke, and Yamada isn't failing it. You know it, I know it, let's move on. Next up though, is an obstacle that strikes fear in the eyes of anyone, ranging from fodder competitors like Eiichi Miura to All-Stars like Yamamoto, Akiyama and Yamada himself, especially the latter two with both having failed it in SASUKE 6, and Akiyama having failed it two subsequent times. Yamada seems to have confidence this time though, as he takes a deep breath, runs up to the mini-tramp, and springs safely to the cargo net, grabbing hold of it! He makes it safely down to the green mat and still has 34 seconds as he prepares to face the obstacle that's essentially ended two of his last four runs, the dreaded Warped Wall. Knowing he has two chances at best as Furutachi announces that he has 30 seconds left, Yamada runs to the base of the wall and back to build up momentum. He runs up, takes a leap and is able to hold on to the top! Yamada can breathe a sigh of relief since he's now in his element with just the Tarzan Jump and Rope Climb left. He grabs hold of the rope and swings across like he's done it a thousand times, and he even takes a bit of time to bow to the crowd before slapping the finish buzzer with 10.97 seconds remaining, making it five in the Second Stage. Takeda, Yamamoto and Katsumi all clear after him, but just when things looked good, Akiyama tragically failed the very first obstacle, leaving only eight people to face the future challenges. Second StageThe Second Stage remains unchanged obstacle-wise, however the time limit has been reduced from the 100 seconds from the last tournament to 80. This seems to already be a big problem, as Iketani timed out while Nakayama would've if he didn't fall on the Spider Walk. Nagano and Nakata cleared however, the former with 2 seconds and the latter with 11, removing most of the worry about the timer. After Iketani's failure, the camera pans to Yamada behind the gates, talking to fellow fireman and new All-Star Takeda. The two exchange tactics on the Spider Walk, and Yamada gives Takeda a thumbs-up before walking up to start his run as the gates open. He takes hold of the chain with his gloved hands on the countdown begins, and the timer starts as he takes off down the first chain. Taking two swings to make sure he doesn't make a silly mistake, he transfers to chain two and kicks off the wall, getting a strong push and smoothly sliding down to the landing mat. After removing his gloves and making his way up the Brick Climb, he prepares to challenge the Spider Walk. It's already taken out Nakayama, nearly timed out Nagano, and would later cause me and probably some of you to yell at your screens with whatever Katsumi tried here later in this tournament. Without wasting a beat, Yamada hops into the Spider Walk, taking a slow but safe approach, which he can afford to do thanks to his pace on the Chain Reaction and Brick Climb. (he was so fast that I was able to do them both in one paragraph! ) Taking his time and making sure he doesn't slip, Yamada is safely able to get through the Spider Walk, and with 33 seconds left, he's all but home and dry. I'll speed through the rest of his run for once, you know how it'll end. He moves through the Goren Hammer easily, and thank god that'll be the last time I ever have to talk about that obstacle... The Gyakusō Conveyor is not an issue as he gets through it in just over five seconds, and the last hurdle, the Wall Lifting, is no problem either. The walls go over his head, one, two, three, and he slams the finish button with 08.48 left, moving on to the Third Stage for a fifth time. He'll be joined by Takeda and Yamamoto, but not Katsumi as the latter tried... Well, I don't even know how to explain it. He timed out, that's all you need to know, moving on! Third Stage
Both men to try the Third Stage so far did so for their first time, but Nagano amazingly made it to the Pipe Slider, while Nakata did about as well on the Lamp Grasper as most people on this forum would. Now, it's Yamada's turn, and over half of the Third Stage is completely new to him. He's learned from the two previous challengers, and steps up to the start of the first of three new obstacles, the Rumbling Dice. While it is better than the Propeller Untei, (which is somehow rated an 8/10 difficulty on Ninja Machine, what's up with that?) there's not much to say about it either. It's a good strength drainer, but for the purposes of this post, there isn't much I can do. The only way to fail it is... Well, you know. I'm not gonna go there. Yamada doesn't do that, and after a while, he eventually drops down safely and shakes out his arms, staring right at his next challenge and one that would take him out just two tournaments later, the Body Prop. Yamada applies chalk to his hands before reaching out over the swamp and propping his arms and legs up to start the obstacle. Inch by inch, he makes his way along, being careful and using the sides of the boards to his advantage. He reaches his hands over the first gap and makes it, but after that comes the tricky part. He must look behind him and cross a big void with his legs. One slip-up and he's in the drink, but his left leg safely makes it across, then his right. The second gap for his arms isn't an issue either, and after about a minute and a half of pure limb torture, Yamada safely dismounts and gives a relieved look to the sidelines. However, he's not out of the woods yet. The next obstacle is the second of the new ones, the Lamp Grasper. Simple in concept, but difficult to master, it has already taken out Nakata and would later take out Takeda, as well as Nakata two more times. Yamada has no experience on it and can only have learned from Nagano, but he has upper body strength in spades and confidently grabs hold of the first two lamps, then swings out over the abyss. Yamada keeps his arms bent at nearly a perfect 90 degree angle as he swings, and his momentum seems to be straight, very little diagonal movement. He moves steadily through and grabs the glowing blue bulbs one by one, keeping his eyes focused on the next lamp and not daring to look at the finish platform. He knows it'll come into sight naturally and he doesn't want to make an avoidable mistake. He reaches the halfway point and keeps swinging, his arms stay locked off, he's nearly there. And then, it all comes to a screeching halt. You see, a lesser thought about aspect of SASUKE is that any competitor can fail at any time for any reason. It doesn't matter how good or bad they are, what the obstacle is, anything can happen. For example, Yamada is in a total grrove right now, one would think. He's fine. But, it only takes one mistake. Yamada misses the globe with his hand when reaching for it, and is left dangling by one arm. And when you're hanging, that's all it takes to fall. Yamada lets out a yell of frustration as his hand swings back and he falls into the water, bringing his ninth attempt at SASUKE to a close. He stares up at the lamp he missed, which would soon become the exact same lamp to end Takeda's run. Yamamoto, well... Yeah. Yamada is interviewed as he gets out of the water, hands on his head. R: Yamada-san, what went wrong? You were so smooth! K: I don't even know. I guess I just didn't get my fingers around it fully, I don't know. I'm disappointed. R: It was still a great run, Yamada-san, we're looking forward to your next one! K: Yeah, I am too. Thank you. Though SASUKE 9 was a mixed bag, there's no denying what SASUKE 10 would be. A tournament of shocking failures, statistically the most time-stringent First Stage ever, and the most famous quote in SASUKE history.
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Post by loboticialtree on Jun 19, 2023 19:19:10 GMT -5
Ok, if this hasn't been added, but SASUKE 20? Let's see how he does after timing out on the Salmon Ladder in 19.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Jun 19, 2023 21:03:38 GMT -5
Ok, if this hasn't been added, but SASUKE 20? Let's see how he does after timing out on the Salmon Ladder in 19. It's already been done, sadly. Appreciate the suggestion though! The tournaments that haven't been done yet are: -10 -22 -24 onwards.
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Post by sasukewarrior333 on Jun 20, 2023 6:35:05 GMT -5
Ok, if this hasn't been added, but SASUKE 20? Let's see how he does after timing out on the Salmon Ladder in 19. It's already been done, sadly. Appreciate the suggestion though! The tournaments that haven't been done yet are: -10 -22 -24 onwards. Hmm, if I were you I'd get 10 and then 22 out of the way in that case. Up to you of course though!
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Jun 20, 2023 8:45:53 GMT -5
Hmm, if I were you I'd get 10 and then 22 out of the way in that case. Up to you of course though! Sounds good, I'll get those two done. Thanks for the suggestion!
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Jul 15, 2023 15:43:05 GMT -5
It's already been done, sadly. Appreciate the suggestion though! The tournaments that haven't been done yet are: -10 -22 -24 onwards. Hmm, if I were you I'd get 10 and then 22 out of the way in that case. Up to you of course though! SASUKE 10Coming off of a T2nd place run in SASUKE 9, 28 year old firefighter Kōji Yamada is back at Midoriyama for SASUKE's ten tournament anniversary, as well as its five-year anniversary. He's seen in the intro looking at the Lamp Grasper, the obstacle that stopped him in his tracks previously, along with Takeda, who met the same fate at the exact same lamp. He and Takeda are put right next to each other for the second time in a row, with the former getting #997 and the latter getting #996. Along with everyone else, they have nothing on their mind but becoming the second person to smack that red button atop the Final Stage tower, but it'll be harder to get there today than ever before. First StageYamada is seen with the other All-Stars, Yamamoto, Katsumi, Takeda, Akiyama, and their newest member, fisherman Makoto Nagano. They strategize for the two new areas in the First Stage, the Daasu (Dance) Bridge and the Tarzan Rope. What they don't know is that a third area has been changed, and the Jump Hang has been made harder. Turns out, this would ensnare Takeda directly before Yamada's run, at which point only four men have made it through. Daisuke Nakata, who holds the fastest time so far at just 02.85 seconds, Hiroyuki Asaoka, who, well, you know the story with the timer... Naoki Iketani, who continued his comeback from SASUKE 9, and lastly, Kenichi Arai, a rookie who has arguably the most casual sub-second clear in history. Yamada looks to join them, and gets an interview before his run. R: Yamada-san, how do you feel about what's happened so far? K: I'm shocked honestly, didn't expect this much failure. I'm just gonna go out and do my best to avenge Takeda-san. R: Okay, I like to hear that! Good luck! K: Thanks. He takes a bow and is introduced by Ichiro Furutachi to a round of applause, and SASUKE's 997'th First Stage run commences after the starting signal. First up is the Godantobi, and though it did take out Akiyama the previous tournament, today it's done the job of a first obstacle and only taken out fodder competitors. Yamada does have a slight scare on it, as he tips a bit to the left dismounting and nearly falls off course, but recovers and is able to challenge the Rolling Maruta for the eighth time. As you may recall from my SASUKE 9 post, I said that no strong competitor failed this until SASUKE 12, (which firstly, apologies to Arai, he failed in 11) so I think you can guess Yamada's result here. Moving on. Next up is the first new area, the Daasu Bridge. I think this might've been based off a Banzuke event or something? I don't know, this obstacle was weird. Want to know how it works? Well... I don't know. You step on a panel and it like, flips or something, even though it's still too small a gap to fall through. I guess the point of the obstacle is that you can rush, trip, and fall off the front edge instead of dismounting properly? I guess? Seems like really the only possibility, and it did actually happen to a couple people earlier. Not Yamada though, being the seasoned veteran he is, he shows no signs of struggle at all and walks across the bridge like it was a normal bridge, going up to face the redesigned Jump Hang. Perhaps a bit shaken by Takeda's fall, he takes a second to test the trampoline before he attempts the obstacle. He runs back, then up to the trampoline and he jumps... And just like Takeda before him, his hands can only graze the net before he splashes down into Midoriyama's muddy pool of despair, having been bested by the Jump Hang for a second time. The crowd is shocked, Furutachi is shocked, his fellow All-Stars put their heads down and look at the floor, not believing what they just saw. A second straight All-Star down via the Jump Hang. He wouldn't be the last either, with Nagano meeting the same fate two runs later. Yamada exits the water to be interviewed, hands on his head. R: What happened there, Yamada-san? Your jump looked good! K: I guess I just psyched myself out, I don't know. I saw Takeda-san fall and it worried me, I couldn't get it out of my head. It's a shame. R: It is, but keep your head up high! K: I will, thank you. Yamada heads over to share his advice with the other All-Stars, and only Katsumi would end up clearing of the lot of them. He'd also clear the Second Stage, and- Geez, why does every tournament have to have a tragic ending? Anyway... Short post compared to normal, but it kinda had to be. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- For me, there is nothing else except writing this timeline.
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Post by loboticialtree on Jul 17, 2023 15:23:57 GMT -5
Ok, finally, K will do 22. I wanna see if he fails Stage 1 like the All-Stars did in real life
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Aug 1, 2023 20:59:37 GMT -5
Ok, finally, K will do 22. I wanna see if he fails Stage 1 like the All-Stars did in real life SASUKE 22
After a resurgence in SASUKE 21, where every competing All-Star did better than they did in SASUKE 20, 35 year old Kōji Yamada and his fellow All-Stars have high hopes for SASUKE 22, expecting that this might be the time one of them breaks through and becomes the third to hit the button on the Final Stage's tower. Of course, [removed during the final draft because KojiFan's an idiot and didn't think about spoilers] but nonetheless, nobody knows that yet, it's just the current tournament they're thinking of. Yamada ends up getting #91 (don't look at me, the numbers made no sense this tournament) and is placed right before Takeda again, and the two are seen talking during the intro. K: You ever tried something like that [Slider Jump]? T: No, that's new to me. I guess the closest thing is the Pipe Slider. K: Ah, well, I apologise in advance then, I'll see you after your bath. Takeda gives Kōji a playful little punch on the arm, stating that he only cleared the easiest version, then the two share a laugh and go back to their fellow All-Stars as Tomoharu Shōji gets ready to start SASUKE 22 off with a bang. Well, I guess it was more of a splash, but eh... First StageThere have been shocks in SASUKE, yeah, results that weren't exactly on everyone's mind, such as Shingo Yamamoto's fail in [insert any tournament except the first three], Akiyama in 6 and 9, and more recently, Nagano in 19. Still, nobody could've predicted the pure lunacy of the First Stage so far. Of the 90 runners so far, only five have cleared, and while that's a good amount for this era of the show so far, the strange part is who occupies those five spots in the winner's circle. The first two clears came from SASUKE Trials qualifiers, and just one clearing was, at the time, completely unprecedented, so to see two clear? It caught everyone off guard. Taiwanese rock climber Lee En-Chih followed with a clear three runs after the latter of the STQers, and elder statesmen Yoshiyuki Okuyama and Hiromichi Satō cleared to round it out so far. And that's it. No All-Stars, no pro athletes unless one counts Lee as a pro athlete, just a gymnast, shoe salesman, rock climber, former sprinter (side note, does anyone know what Okuyama actually did as a job during his SASUKE career?) and TV celebrity. Needless to say, this has been a strange tournament. Yamada looks to get the All-Stars on the board and avenge Yamamoto, Akiyama and Katsumi, and he steps up to the start line as a VTR of his previous Shin-SASUKE fails plays along with his theme in the background. The viewers are reminded of the All-Stars' resurgence and how the three strongest ones are yet to run, then the camera cuts back to Yamada receiving advice from the three who have fallen by the wayside. Soon after, he is introduced by announcer Wataru Ogasawara and the starting beeps sound. Yamada charges into the course, starting with an old friend, the Rokudantobi. With a few quick strides, Yamada crosses the obstacle like he's done so many times in the past, and then prepares to face a new area, the Circle Hammer. It wasn't necessarily a bad second obstacle per se, it just didn't take out or do damage to anyone with potential, but- Ah, who cares. Let's be real here, this stuff I'm writing right now is filler, and you don't even realise it. You're just reading it cause I might have something funny to say, because I know you don't care about the Circle Hammer either. Guess what? Nothing funny. I've just made you read 75 and counting words (if one counts 75 as a word) for nothing. You silly goose. Now let's get back to the action. Well, would you look at that, in the time it took me to write all that filler, Yamada cleared the Circle Hammer and Log Grip! Cool, less writing for me! Now, next up however, is an obstacle that's far more than filler, one that if executed properly, could still be a force to be reckoned with even today. It is none other than the one, the only, the Jumping Spider. It's already taken out Katsumi just ten runs ago and would go on to eliminate Takeda right after Yamada's run, along with a few other notable competitors such as... Err... Well, okay, it did damage in the past and future okay? Geez, cut me some slack here... Anyway, it's a tense moment as Yamada runs up, takes a leap, and... He sticks it. Being a veteran of the Spider Walk, Yamada has no problems with that section of the obstacle, and is able to dismount safely to face the Half-Pipe Attack. Hello. This is YourResidentKojiFan's editor speaking. In order to save you all the memory of what happened on this obstacle earlier this tournament, I'm making the executive decision to delete the parts of this paragraph that mention it. Apologies if this makes the paragraph look strange, I'm doing what I think is best. Thank you.
The All-Stars watch on nervously, as this obstacle has already taken out many strong competitors, including Akiyama and [REDACTED]. It shouldn't be an issue for someone who works with ropes to save lives, you wouldn't think, but as we saw earlier, [REDACTED]. Sure enough, Yamada is easily able to grab the rope, but perhaps shaken by [REDACTED], he takes two swings to make sure he's safe. He lands on the pad, and thankfully avoids [REDACTED] before going up to face the Warped Wall for the 15th time. I told you it'd make the paragraph look strange. With about 50 seconds to go and the stringent time limit today, Yamada must make it up the wall in one go if he wants to have any shot at clearing, and thankfully, he does, scaling the 5.2 meter beast like a mere ladder. Now, he must face the new obstacle today, the Slider Jump. Sort of a Jump Hang/Stick Slider hybrid, this obstacle took out veteran and former Last Man Standing Levi Meeuwenberg already, and would later take out Nagano in perhaps the biggest shock of Shin-SASUKE. Yamada grabs hold of the bar with the overhand grip, takes a second before sliding down the track, then once he gets to the end, he reaches out... And then, the sound of despair in SASUKE, the loud splash of a competitor falling, is heard. Yamada's left hand missed the cargo net and his right couldn't hold him up, sending the fireman plummeting for the exact bath he playfully teased Takeda about. There's no jokes here now, Yamada is heartbroken, head in his hands, as he climbs out of the water and dries off. As we know, Takeda and Nagano would fail after, marking the first time ever that no All-Star made it out of Stage 1. Even Yamada couldn't save that from happening this time. AftermathNobody would end up clearing after Yamada, leaving only five to take on the Second Stage, which, well, I can just tell you it only took out Hiromichi and that's all you need to know. The Third Stage however, had an iconic moment, when shoe salesman and former unknown Yuuji Urushihara broke through and became the first person in 5 tournaments and approximately 900 days to reach the Final Stage. He would end up being the only one to do so, and would end up falling mere centimeters short, but as we all know, he wasn't done. Turns out, neither was Yamada, nor the rest of the All-Stars. Well, except Shiratori, but y'know... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you ever feel useless, just know that you aren't the Swing Ladder.
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Post by sasukewarrior333 on Aug 10, 2023 19:23:21 GMT -5
Ok, finally, K will do 22. I wanna see if he fails Stage 1 like the All-Stars did in real life SASUKE 22
After a resurgence in SASUKE 21, where every competing All-Star did better than they did in SASUKE 20, 35 year old Kōji Yamada and his fellow All-Stars have high hopes for SASUKE 22, expecting that this might be the time one of them breaks through and becomes the third to hit the button on the Final Stage's tower. Of course, [removed during the final draft because KojiFan's an idiot and didn't think about spoilers] but nonetheless, nobody knows that yet, it's just the current tournament they're thinking of. Yamada ends up getting #91 (don't look at me, the numbers made no sense this tournament) and is placed right before Takeda again, and the two are seen talking during the intro. K: You ever tried something like that [Slider Jump]? T: No, that's new to me. I guess the closest thing is the Pipe Slider. K: Ah, well, I apologise in advance then, I'll see you after your bath. Takeda gives Kōji a playful little punch on the arm, stating that he only cleared the easiest version, then the two share a laugh and go back to their fellow All-Stars as Tomoharu Shōji gets ready to start SASUKE 22 off with a bang. Well, I guess it was more of a splash, but eh... First StageThere have been shocks in SASUKE, yeah, results that weren't exactly on everyone's mind, such as Shingo Yamamoto's fail in [insert any tournament except the first three], Akiyama in 6 and 9, and more recently, Nagano in 19. Still, nobody could've predicted the pure lunacy of the First Stage so far. Of the 90 runners so far, only five have cleared, and while that's a good amount for this era of the show so far, the strange part is who occupies those five spots in the winner's circle. The first two clears came from SASUKE Trials qualifiers, and just one clearing was, at the time, completely unprecedented, so to see two clear? It caught everyone off guard. Taiwanese rock climber Lee En-Chih followed with a clear three runs after the latter of the STQers, and elder statesmen Yoshiyuki Okuyama and Hiromichi Satō cleared to round it out so far. And that's it. No All-Stars, no pro athletes unless one counts Lee as a pro athlete, just a gymnast, shoe salesman, rock climber, former sprinter (side note, does anyone know what Okuyama actually did as a job during his SASUKE career?) and TV celebrity. Needless to say, this has been a strange tournament. Yamada looks to get the All-Stars on the board and avenge Yamamoto, Akiyama and Katsumi, and he steps up to the start line as a VTR of his previous Shin-SASUKE fails plays along with his theme in the background. The viewers are reminded of the All-Stars' resurgence and how the three strongest ones are yet to run, then the camera cuts back to Yamada receiving advice from the three who have fallen by the wayside. Soon after, he is introduced by announcer Wataru Ogasawara and the starting beeps sound. Yamada charges into the course, starting with an old friend, the Rokudantobi. With a few quick strides, Yamada crosses the obstacle like he's done so many times in the past, and then prepares to face a new area, the Circle Hammer. It wasn't necessarily a bad second obstacle per se, it just didn't take out or do damage to anyone with potential, but- Ah, who cares. Let's be real here, this stuff I'm writing right now is filler, and you don't even realise it. You're just reading it cause I might have something funny to say, because I know you don't care about the Circle Hammer either. Guess what? Nothing funny. I've just made you read 75 and counting words (if one counts 75 as a word) for nothing. You silly goose. Now let's get back to the action. Well, would you look at that, in the time it took me to write all that filler, Yamada cleared the Circle Hammer and Log Grip! Cool, less writing for me! Now, next up however, is an obstacle that's far more than filler, one that if executed properly, could still be a force to be reckoned with even today. It is none other than the one, the only, the Jumping Spider. It's already taken out Katsumi just ten runs ago and would go on to eliminate Takeda right after Yamada's run, along with a few other notable competitors such as... Err... Well, okay, it did damage in the past and future okay? Geez, cut me some slack here... Anyway, it's a tense moment as Yamada runs up, takes a leap, and... He sticks it. Being a veteran of the Spider Walk, Yamada has no problems with that section of the obstacle, and is able to dismount safely to face the Half-Pipe Attack. Hello. This is YourResidentKojiFan's editor speaking. In order to save you all the memory of what happened on this obstacle earlier this tournament, I'm making the executive decision to delete the parts of this paragraph that mention it. Apologies if this makes the paragraph look strange, I'm doing what I think is best. Thank you.
The All-Stars watch on nervously, as this obstacle has already taken out many strong competitors, including Akiyama and [REDACTED]. It shouldn't be an issue for someone who works with ropes to save lives, you wouldn't think, but as we saw earlier, [REDACTED]. Sure enough, Yamada is easily able to grab the rope, but perhaps shaken by [REDACTED], he takes two swings to make sure he's safe. He lands on the pad, and thankfully avoids [REDACTED] before going up to face the Warped Wall for the 15th time. I told you it'd make the paragraph look strange. With about 50 seconds to go and the stringent time limit today, Yamada must make it up the wall in one go if he wants to have any shot at clearing, and thankfully, he does, scaling the 5.2 meter beast like a mere ladder. Now, he must face the new obstacle today, the Slider Jump. Sort of a Jump Hang/Stick Slider hybrid, this obstacle took out veteran and former Last Man Standing Levi Meeuwenberg already, and would later take out Nagano in perhaps the biggest shock of Shin-SASUKE. Yamada grabs hold of the bar with the overhand grip, takes a second before sliding down the track, then once he gets to the end, he reaches out... And then, the sound of despair in SASUKE, the loud splash of a competitor falling, is heard. Yamada's left hand missed the cargo net and his right couldn't hold him up, sending the fireman plummeting for the exact bath he playfully teased Takeda about. There's no jokes here now, Yamada is heartbroken, head in his hands, as he climbs out of the water and dries off. As we know, Takeda and Nagano would fail after, marking the first time ever that no All-Star made it out of Stage 1. Even Yamada couldn't save that from happening this time. AftermathNobody would end up clearing after Yamada, leaving only five to take on the Second Stage, which, well, I can just tell you it only took out Hiromichi and that's all you need to know. The Third Stage however, had an iconic moment, when shoe salesman and former unknown Yuuji Urushihara broke through and became the first person in 5 tournaments and approximately 900 days to reach the Final Stage. He would end up being the only one to do so, and would end up falling mere centimeters short, but as we all know, he wasn't done. Turns out, neither was Yamada, nor the rest of the All-Stars. Well, except Shiratori, but y'know... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you ever feel useless, just know that you aren't the Swing Ladder.I look forward to seeing how our man will do in my 2nd favourite tournament, SASUKE 24.
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