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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Mar 18, 2024 9:36:44 GMT -5
How about the infamous SASUKE 28? Err, excuse me, editor, sir? You've made an error here. That can't be right. It is.No, no, it isn't. Look, that part there? No shot. I mean, that's definitely correct, I don't know what to tell you.Seriously? Are we talking about the same part? The part that says Inui wanted to forcefully retire the All-Stars?Yeah. Yeah, that's right. I promise you, I've double and triple checked. Besides, when do I ever get facts wrong?When you said Daisuke Miyazaki was the first person to attempt the Devil Steps? ...Okay, besides that. Look, we're going off script here, it's right, okay? Look, here's some posts about it on SMF.Fine, I trust you. That's ridiculous though. Yeah, yeah, it is.SASUKE 28Yes, dear reader, Inui's brilliant plan was to make SASUKE 28 the last tournament of the All-Stars. Takeda, Shingo, Nagano, Akiyama, Kōji, Katsumi, all of them are competing, but understandably, none of them are in the best spirits. While Akiyama was seemingly on the verge of retirement anyway, Katsumi was 47 and would soon create a group of competitors called the Black Tigers to teach, and Nagano had openly stated he was past his prime and didn't enjoy competing as much as before, for Takeda, Shingo and Kōji, the former two having made the Second Stage as recently as 25 and the latter just four tournaments removed from a Kanzen of all things, this feels like a punch in the gut. This is different to last year. Inui has an option. There is no bankruptcy or anything, Inui willfully chose to make this decision, to retire specifically the All-Stars, nobody else. To this day, it still makes zero sense. But, it's what's happening. Though Bunpei Shiratori has made the 1000 IQ play of "Can't be retired if you're not there", the other six All-Stars have all showed up to Midoriyama for one last hurrah, on a renewal course that has been redesigned with both the obstacles themselves and the aesthetic look, with the course now being mostly black instead of the red of the Shin-SASUKE era. As for the obstacles themselves, the Godantobi has returned as 1.1, the Spin Bridge has been moved to 1.3, a new version of the Jump Hang known as the Jump Hang Kai is 1.4, the Soritatsu Kabe has been given an extra, completely pointless, wall, and there are now only 7 obstacles instead of 9. You may ask, "KojiFan, what sort of renewal is that?", and I'd tell you, a bad one. Everything about this tournament was bad apart from the fact that it even happened. Enough about my opinion though, let's get to the tournament. Since the All-Stars are being retired, they are given the last six numbers. Akiyama, #95. Takeda, #96. Shingo, #97. Katsumi, #98. Kōji, #99, and of course Nagano at #100. The rest of the field is... Well, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. The numbers aside, the All-Stars have had minimal training since they've been figuring the show was done, but they're all still very athletic, and can still put up a good last stand. They're all seen talking right before the tournament starts, looking like a football team in the locker room. N: Hey, look, we all said to just have fun last time, right? Same thing here. Whatever happens happens. T: At least I get to compete this time too. A: Yep, I don't expect to clear but it'd be nice. Any one of us clearing would. Kōji: Agreed. We've all still got the ability. N: And hey, even if we can't compete after, we can still watch. Maybe I'll get another protege or something. Katsumi: That's a good idea! Be right back, gotta make some calls. And that, dear reader, is how the Black Tigers were founded. (You're welcome, ahzoo, I gave you a reason to tolerate 28)
First StageSo, after a win, you would think that the clear rates, especially on the First Stage, would be dramatically reduced. In this instance, you'd be right. 98 have ran already and only 5 have cleared. These five are decathlete Koki Someya, SASUKE superfan and new Shin Sedai member Kazuma Asa, SASUKE 27 finalist Ryo Matachi, double champ Urushihara, and SASUKE 23 finalist Hitoshi Kanno, the latter three all clearing in a row from #87-#89. As for the others, well... Nobody else has really even made a deep run. Because Inui has made the decision to retire the All-Stars, other elder statesmen like Yoshiyuki Okuyama and Kenji Takahashi aren't competing due to their ages being at or near some of the All-Stars. Combine this with the lack of American talent due to ANW no longer sending finalists to Japan, that already accounts for 12 people who have the talent to clear, gone. For most of the returning veterans who have competed, it's been death by Spin Bridge all around, with victims of it including SASUKE 24 finalists Lee En-Chih and Kōji Hashimoto. As for the All-Stars, Akiyama and Yamamoto were also felled by the Spin Bridge, and shockingly, Takeda had the worst performance of his career to that point, failing the very end of the Rolling Escargot by dismounting too early. Katsumi did a little better, timing out just as he pulled himself atop the first wall of the Ni Ren Soritatsu Kabe, but it's still been disappointment all around. As Yamada steps up to the start line, a VTR plays of his Kanzenseiha and subsequent failures, as well as the training he's been doing in the weeks before the tournament. His theme plays as Keisuke Hatsuta introduces the 39 year old, 28-time veteran, 3-time finalist. H: Under the dark sky of Midoriyama, we've seen a lot of defeat. Akiyama, Takeda, Yamamoto, and Katsumi Yamada have all been turned back by the First Stage. However, this man could very well break up the losing streak. Our 99th challenger, he's a SASUKE 24 Grand Champion and a longtime member of the SASUKE All-Stars, he's competed with us every single time, it's 39 year old Kōji Yamada! Yamada points to his family and gives them a thumbs-up, then takes a deep breath and prepares to challenge Midoriyama for the first time in over a year. The countdown goes and the 105-second timer starts as Yamada runs up to an old friend, the Godantobi. Now significantly easier than the version used from SASUKE 8 to 11, nobody of note has had any trouble with it at all and Yamada clears it easily, next facing the Rolling Escargot that had taken out Takeda less than 30 minutes ago. Like the Godantobi, it was making its final appearance this tournament, likely due to only one familiar face other than Takeda going out on it with that being Naoki Iketani, who had just begun a decline steeper than the roller coaster Takabisha. Yamada starts the wheel and hangs on for dear life as it spins, once, twice, and while his right foot briefly comes out of the hold on the third revolution, he's able to recover and get the wheel going again to make the fourth and final spin before jumping off safely. Though it did cost him a few seconds to have to pause on the third spin, the time limit isn't too strict, so a semi-quick pace on the rest of the obstacles should see him through to the Second Stage. The third obstacle will help with that seeing as you have to go fast, it's the Spin Bridge, which as I mentioned earlier has done more damage to the skilled part of the field than every other obstacle combined. Along with the aforementioned victims of it, you have Yusuke Suzuki, and while he hadn't yet made a big impact, he would go on to be the new SASUKE Sensei and make the Third Stage multiple times. There's also Koji Fujinami, who had made a very deep run in the ultimate renewal of SASUKE 18. So yeah, pretty scary today. Despite the failures, expectations are high as Yamada is one of the few competing today that can say he's beaten the Spin Bridge before, having done so in SASUKE 27. He pauses briefly to plan his attack on the K-Mart version of Newton's Cradle, then starts sprinting across the spheres, one, two, three, four... ...splash. Yep. Just like Yamamoto, Akiyama, and many others before him, Yamada simply had a misstep on the last sphere, tilting his body backwards in a way where he couldn't reach the landing pad with his hands, failing in a nearly identical way to Yamamoto in SASUKE 27. Nagano seems more frustrated than anything, Takeda and Yamamoto both look at each other in solemn silence, while Katsumi and Akiyama help Yamada dry off, handing him towels as he climbs out of the murky pond. After a minute to shake off his failure, Yamada is, probably against his will at the moment, interviewed. R: Yamada-san, you almost had it! How are you feeling right now? K: I'm, I'm not happy. I could've done so much better, and just like Takeda-san, I want to come back. That wasn't anywhere close to me at my best, and I... I really don't even know what went wrong, I thought my technique was good, but I guess not. Either way, that... That wasn't good. I feel like I've let my friends and family down. R: Well, it must be devastating, but keep your head up high, you've done very well over these 15 years. K: Thank you, I'll try my best. Good luck, Nagano-san. He gives a bow to Nagano and walks back to the sidelines to a round of applause from the crowd, not saying much other than apologies and well-wishes to the other All-Stars. After exchanging words with his friends, he heads to his family, apologizing to them and stating how much he wishes he could show them that he still had it. Despite his seemingly somber mood, he's still glad he got to compete again at all after the M9 bankruptcy debacle, and after some hugs from his biggest supporters, he shakes off his own run and watches as Nagano prepares to begin his. Aftermath
While Nagano would go the furthest of the All-Stars, he would end up timing out on the second wall of the Ni Ren Soritatsu Kabe due to not using the proper technique, leaving just Someya, Asa, Matachi, Urushihara and Kanno to take on the rest of the course. While Someya and Matachi would be defeated by the redesigned Second Stage, Asa, Urushihara and Kanno cleared it with time to spare, only to all be defeated by the same Third Stage obstacle. You see, if you thought the Ultimate Cliffhanger was tough, then the new version, the Crazy Cliffhanger, takes it to a whole other level. The first three ledges are almost the exact same as the Cliffhanger Kai, but once you get to the third ledge, you have to swing your body and make a 1.8 meter jump, while turning 180° in mid-air, then catch the fourth ledge. Very, very difficult by all means, not a surprise everyone failed it. As for Yamada, well, turns out the All-Star retirement was realised to be a giant mistake. So he would get to come back the next tournament, along with Takeda, Shingo and Nagano. However, that tournament... Well, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Folks, if you think I've been taking a while to write this TL, you're right, but you are not prepared for how quickly 29 will go up once that one gets requested. |
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Post by edaan on Mar 18, 2024 10:38:45 GMT -5
Let’s go for it then, the almost as infamous Sasuke 29.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Mar 18, 2024 12:47:32 GMT -5
Let’s go for it then, the almost as infamous Sasuke 29. ...why? Why do you want to read this? Is it for my humour? Is it for the dialogue? Why? Name me one reason. Because you sure don't want to read it for the result, I know that. You all know what's gonna happen. I can tell you that Kōji gets #98 in this tournament and that's literally all you need to know to be able to predict his result 11 times out of 10. The man's 39 years old and he'd be dealing with a Backstream that nearly drowned Yuuji, (who by the way, gets #100 in 29 in this TL, he deserves to wear it once) like, come on. Do you really think he'd beat it with enough time to also beat a Passing Wall with wet hands on that stage? No, no you don't, because he wouldn't. Listen, dear reader, I like you, and I hope you like me. So I'm doing us both a favour here. You don't have to read 5,000+ words of filler for a horrible tournament that did everything wrong, and I don't have to type it when this project has already taken me months and has burnt me out numerous times. Literally all you need to know is that he cleared the First Stage with 11.84 seconds left and that he timed out on the Backstream. That's it. Those are the only important facts. I can't be bothered to write stuff that doesn't matter. No matter how much I try, there is just no suspense or anything. Thank you for understanding. Have a good day, I'll see you in SASUKE 30. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Told you it'd be quick. Can't say the same about 30 though. |
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Jul 16, 2024 7:59:39 GMT -5
- 30 [as that was the easiest S1 we have had since 2000 lol, and to see if you have the heart to let its S2 BS spoil an otherwise surefire comeback],
That brings me, of course, to Kōji Yamada. Having turned 40 a few months after SASUKE 29, and having not made the Third Stage since 2010, he knows. His friends and family know that he's begun that decline, and though Yamada himself never really thought he'd get back to the top of the Final Stage tower, let alone the base of it, he does know he still has something left. His flame is still burning, no pun intended, and he wants to let people know.
However, given the history of SASUKE as a whole and the recent struggles of competitors at or around his age that aren't nicknamed after a certain gorilla, it doesn't look too good. Only 6 people aged 40 or older have ever cleared the First Stage up to this point, with those being 44 year old Kiyomi Inoue all the way back in SASUKE 1, 40 year old Hidenori Nagasawa in SASUKE 16, 41 year old Bunpei Shiratori in SASUKE 21, Hiromichi Satō in 22 and 24 at the ages of 40 and 41 respectively, Yoshiyuki Okuyama in 26, 27 and 29 while being 40, 41 and 43, and Wakky in 29 at 40. That's it. No other 40 year old has ever cleared, and Okuyama is the only one of those who has reached the Third Stage.
Sure, it's possible. But it'll be tough, and especially with the mental rollercoaster Yamada has been on since his Kanzen, he doesn't expect anything much. After all, he had the worst performance of his career less than two years ago, and his age can only hurt him. He's considered retirement a couple times. He's achieved his goal, he can still attend tournaments to cheer on his friends, is there much of a point anymore?
Ah... What the heck.
SASUKE 30
After the train wreck of a tournament that was SASUKE 29, there's one thing on everyone's mind regarding the upcoming competition: The Backstream. I didn't give it a proper introduction, but it definitely needs one for those of you who don't fully understand why SASUKE 29 was written the way it was. It's SASUKE's first, and as of this being written, only obstacle where you can touch the water, infact you're required to as the obstacle itself is a pool that must be swam across to reach a ladder on the other side.
Seems simple, right? Well, it is. That's why there's water jets at the end of the pool intended to push competitors back if they're too tired to provide enough force. That's all well and good, but in SASUKE 29, the producers decided that they would turn the obstacle into a lab experiment, actively turning up and down the jets' power in the middle of the competition. The jet power was decreased after Koji Hashimoto's fail and increased again after Kenji Takahashi's clear, hence causing Yamada's failure as the jets were increased to a level very few people can power through quickly, (oh yeah, did I mention that the time limit was ridiculously tight as well?) let alone a 39 year old who had barely trained swimming.
Backstream aside, the main thing from SASUKE 29 was the conquering of the Crazy Cliffhanger, which was accomplished by a relative unknown, 21 year old Yūsuke Morimoto. He made it all the way to the final obstacle of the Third Stage, the Pipe Slider, which earned him the coveted #3000 this tournament over people like Urushihara, Nagano and Yamada himself, those three getting #2993, #2999 and #2998 respectively. The lineup also includes other stars like Ryo Matachi at #2994, Shingo and Takeda back as always, and Bunpei Shiratori back after 9 tournaments at #2996.
The rest of the field, for our purposes, isn't too important, so let's get to the tournament for now, shall we? It's honestly, overall, a pretty good one.
First Stage
After the 21 clears last tournament, (yes, 21) the First Stage was expected to be changed, yet the only change was to the final obstacle. We'll go over the changes from 28 to 29 as we get to them, but unsurprisingly, the results have improved massively due to the better fields and for this tournament, relatively stagnant course. Of the 97 that have ran before Yamada, 24 have cleared, although the first man who did, Noritomo Morisawa, had to withdraw due to a neck injury. That still leaves 23 to take on the Second Stage so far, including Hiroshige Yamamoto, the first of a group led by Katsumi Yamada called the Black Tigers, or, "Kurotora", to clear. Joining him are All-Stars and veterans like Takahashi, Shingo, Takeda, Lee En-Chih and Shunsuke Nagasaki, as well as rising stars like Masashi Hioki, Ryo, Urushihara, and a bunch of guys who also cleared in 29 but failed the Second Stage. Spoiler alert, most of them just failed it again and never competed again. Yay, fodder! Surely that won't be a reoccurring theme with future tournaments!
Yamada gets some words of encouragement from his family and the All-Stars as he walks up to the start line, his theme playing as a VTR is shown with him training swimming at a local pool, as well as him telling the camera person that he's not gone a day without training something since the last tournament, wanting to provide at least one more great run before his potential declined. Once that ends, Yamada is introduced by announcer Keisuke Hatsuta and the countdown beeps go off, then he starts his run, beginning with the first of the new obstacles from 29, the Long Jump. Yes, it is literally a long jump, a huge run-up and then a 4.5 meter gap into a sand pit. [Editor's note: For those who know about him, wouldn't you have just loved to see prime Bob Beamon attempt that?]
Yamada starts off at a steady jog, then speeds up until he reaches the end of the runway, avoiding the mistake he made in 27 and jumping while still above something solid, safely clearing the gap and landing in the admittedly rather uncomfortable-looking sand. Next up is an old friend to Yamada, the predecessor and succeeder to the Rolling Escargot, the Log Grip. However, this version is modified to where instead of putting their fingers in small holes like a bowling ball, competitors grab onto thin, padded(?) ledges, making it much easier, as evidenced by the fact that Katsuhide Torisawa of all people cleared it earlier this tournament. Unsurprisingly, the ride down poses no issues for Yamada, and he's able to challenge the second brand new obstacle from 29, the Hedgehog, which despite its seemingly easy nature, actually did take out a few notable competitors, including Takeda in 29.
The obstacle itself looks like nothing more than if Splatalot had a higher budget for the Mace Roll, but like many a balance obstacle before it, it's very easily failable if rushed. Yamada locks his eyes onto the rotating pillars, waiting for his moment before starting his run through, brushing spikes aside as he safely makes his way across, down to challenge another familiar foe.
Well, sort of.
You see, the Golden Era of SASUKE, tournaments 5 through 17, could easily be defined by just one obstacle, the Jump Hang. The first ever trampoline area, and the first truly difficult First Stage obstacle, one that, in tandem with the Soritatsu Kabe, reduced the amount of clears from 38 in SASUKE 4, to only 3 in SASUKE 5. It stayed until Nagano's Kanzenseiha, then was removed for the giant renewal of Shin-SASUKE. It did make one more one-off appearance for SASUKE 25, but like most obstacles from that First Stage, it was removed right after and seemingly scrapped forever.
However, knowing the goober that is Masato Inui, all it probably took was some random guy on the street going "Wouldn't it be cool if there were two nets?" for the lightbulb to go off, and thus, the Jump Hang Kai was born. The obstacle's design admittedly looks very goofy, a mini-trampoline that you have to bounce diagonally off of in order to reach one of the two nets placed on each side of the structure. Leaping straight out no longer works as there's nothing to grab, but despite that, this version has proven to be objectively easier, with the only notable competitors to be taken out by it being the aforementioned Hiroshige last tournament, and surprisingly, Bunpei Shiratori, the king of the original Jump Hang.
Taking a second to gather himself and make sure he doesn't make an avoidable error, Yamada takes a breath before running up to the trampoline, jumping out to the right-side net and safely hanging on, traversing sideways across a la the Net Bridge (see why this obstacle wasn't really liked?) and making it to safe ground. Next up on the checklist is another "old but new" obstacle, this monstrosity called the Ni Ren Soritatsu Kabe. If you know your basic Japanese, you would know that yes, it's another idea Inui got from somebody behind him in the Starbucks line. The Soritatsu Kabe... But there's two of them!!11!!!11!!1!1!!
insert fake dramatic sound effects
Okay, in all actually, it wasn't that bad, the main problem is that the first of the two walls is significantly shorter, causing it to function more as a practice wall than anything. While 4m/~13.1ft and 4.5m/~14.76ft may not seem like too big a difference, it absolutely is, as evidenced by the fact that only one person ever timed out on the first wall, while strong competitors like Nagano, Urushihara, Yūsuke, and Tomohiro Kawaguchi have or will time out on the second one. Obviously the first wall poses zero challenge as it has all day, and with 50 seconds, Yamada still has plenty of time to gear himself up for his attempt on the second one.
Doing the classic strategy of running forward, then back, then forward again, Yamada has plenty of speed and momentum, reaching the top with his right and then left hand, pulling himself up to cheers from the spectators. Just two obstacles remain now for the 40 year old, one old, one new. The first is the Tarzan Rope, an obstacle that has been around since SASUKE 3. Not a problem, though the last obstacle is, as I said, brand new. Replacing the Rope Ladder that had been used in the last 12 tournaments is the Lumberjack Climb, where competitors have to grab the sides of a wooden plank and shimmy their way up to the top, sort of like the Spider Flip. A primary time waster, though it actually can be failed like a normal obstacle as Kenji Darvish showed earlier.
With plenty of time still on the clock, Yamada wipes his hands off on his orange fireman pants to make sure there's minimal moisture, then begins his climb. Up and up he traverses the 5.4-meter plank, moving smoothly but not recklessly. He eventually reaches the top, smiling as he smacks the finish button with a very solid 23.33 seconds remaining, becoming the 25th challenger that day to clear. The remaining two competitors, Nagano and Morimoto all cleared behind him, making it 4 straight to round things out and 27 clearing, and due to Morisawa's neck injury, 26 to take on the...
Second Stage
For the second straight time, Yamada will take on the redesigned Second Stage, and this time he'll be joined by a bunch of familiar faces. Takeda, Yamamoto, and Nagano are all in with him, marking the first time since SASUKE 23, and the last time ever that there would be even three, let alone four All-Stars in the Second Stage. However, both Takeda and Yamamoto have been vanquished by the stage, the former getting disqualified on a new version of the Salmon Ladder that I'll get to in a moment, and the latter timing out after accidentally inhaling water on the (now fair) Backstream.
On the other hand, 8 have cleared so far, a few more than the previous tournament, including first time clearers like Masashi Hioki, Tomohiro Kawaguchi, and Shinya Kishimoto, along with Third Stage veterans like Kanno, Asa, and Shunsuke Nagasaki for the first time since SASUKE 18. However, nobody has cleared with more than 10 seconds, (though Asa cleared with 10 exactly) so the time limit is very worrying, especially for a 40 year old. As he climbs the stairs, he gets some advice from his fellow All-Star and Grand Champion who will run directly after him, Makoto Nagano.
N: Yamada-san?
K: Yes?
N: Listen, I know the Swap is tricky, but remember, you won't clear if you take too long. Leave yourself as much time as you think you can for the Wall Lifting. Remember, wet hands.
K: Yes, I've been thinking about that. I'm gonna give it all I got, but, I think I'm prepared enough for this. See you in the Third Stage, okay?
The two champions nod to each other as Kōji walks to the starting gate and his theme plays to Hatsuta introducing the fireman.
H: So far, the Second Stage has been as deadly as ever, defeating challenger after challenger who has dared to take it on. Only 8 have succeeded, and both SASUKE All-Stars who have tried have fallen already. Here's the third of four, a longtime firefighter from Gujo in Gifu prefecture, and a man who completely conquered the course in the 24th tournament. He has his record-breaking 14th Third Stage attempt on the line tonight, it's 40-year-old Kōji Yamada!
The starting signal sounds and the 110-second timer starts counting down as Yamada takes on the first obstacle, the Cross Slider. I consider it the Body Prop's son, as it makes competitors put their hands on slightly angled walls on either side of them and hold themselves up while the obstacle slides down a short track. It has done some damage, taking out three competitors so far including Kinnikun Nakayama in his first Second Stage attempt since SASUKE 11, but Yamada is able to survive the ride down and drops to the platform safely. However, the next obstacle won't be anywhere near as easy. As 2.2 is always the Salmon Ladder, we all knew that, but it's a brand new variant this time, called the Swap Salmon Ladder.
Instead of just going straight up, competitors now have to make a series of Double Salmon Ladder transition-esque moves over five sets of rungs, so four moves total. The kicker to this obstacle though, is if at any point the bar becomes lopsided or worse, a competitor misses a transition and drop down a full rung, they will be disqualified due to "safety reasons". This has happened a few times already, once in SASUKE 29 to Toshiharu Takami, and three times this tournament. Hiroshige Yamamoto, Takeda, and very controversially, Kenji Takahashi have all fallen victim to this rule.
Yamada hops up to the first bar and gets his swing going, making the easiest of the transitions, the only one that doesn't go up. He turns his body around and kicks forward, then hops the bar up and over to the third rung. Repeating the motion two more times, Yamada has successfully defeated the Swap Salmon Ladder, and can now move on to the "Unstable Bridge". Nicknamed by a friend of mine the Ghetto Bridge for good reason, it is now only one four-chained board, no transition, and a very easy dismount. Thankfully it will be removed after this tournament, and like it has all night, it causes no issues to Yamada.
The fourth obstacle is now no longer the Balance Tank, instead one of the oldest, most iconic obstacles of all time, the Spider Walk. A shortened variant closer to SASUKE 5-6's version, (the only version Yamada has never attempted) it serves more as a time waster along with its extension, the Spider Drop. It's not officially an obstacle yet, but it will be. While the Spider Walk part is no problem for the man who has beaten a spider walking obstacle in 21 of the previous 29 tournaments, the Spider Drop is brand new. A 1.8 meter drop to a lone panel, it isn't too difficult at first glance, but as any experienced Ninja will tell you, all it takes is one slight slip. Yamada slowly but surely inches down and reaches his legs out, locking them on, then his hands, and then he's finally back on safe ground.
With about 45 seconds left, Yamada climbs up the ladder to face the obstacle that took him and about 43% of the world's population out last tournament, the Backstream. He puts on his swimming goggles and lowers himself in as the other All-Stars watch on, Shingo and Nagano reminding him to go to the right, as that is where the jets are at their least powerful. He does, kicking off the wall behind him to get a good first push, then swimming like his life depends on it to get to the end of the 9m pool.
He keeps going forward, no matter how hard the jets may try to push him back, and once he nears the end of the obstacle, he must face the full wrath of the jets in order to get to the safety ladder on the left edge of the pool. He doesn't pause for a second, knowing there isn't any time to lose. Powering through the jets, Yamada grabs the ladder with his left hand and then his right, climbing out and vanquishing the obstacle that bested him a year ago. There's now 23 seconds left, which would normally be more than enough time for the final obstacle, the Wall Lifting.
Normally.
Being the astute physicists you lot are, I'm sure you've all noticed that swimming through a pool, or any body of water in general, does tend to make one's hands wet. With the knowledge that wet hands are harder to grab things with, a genius such as yourself can make the correct inference that yes, the Wall Lifting will be much harder to, well... lift, than normal. Not only that, but a lot of power is needed for the Backstream, which is also generally needed to lift a combined 120kg/264lb. It's not impossible, but very difficult to do in such a low amount of time.
He lifts up the first wall after taking a couple seconds to get a grip, ducking under it like Shingo has done so many times in the past to save time. He stumbles over a bit and essentially crawls to the second wall, straining to lift that as the klaxon begins to blare. He ducks again and stays upright this time, shaking his hands to get whatever water he can off them before grabbing the final, 50kg wall and heaving it up as the seconds tick down, 5, 4, 3...
Nagano and Katsumi's yells overlap each other as Yamada ducks under the final wall and reaches for the finish button, smacking it with 01.52 seconds left and becoming just the second person ever to reach the Third Stage while being 40 or older. He practically collapses on the mat, his chest puffing in and out as he takes deep breaths, his 108-second gauntlet to the finish finally over. For the first time in almost three years, there will be an All-Star in the Third Stage, with this marking Kōji's first appearance in over four years.
He gets his customary congratulations from his friends and family, thanking his kids for the support they've given him over the years and giving his wife a hug. He then walks back over to the sidelines to watch Nagano run, which turns out to end in disastrous fashion as he, like Takeda before him, was DQed on the Swap Salmon Ladder. Even Morimoto would fail as well to round out the stage, getting stuck under the final wall of the Wall Lifting and timing out there. Thus, for the third time in his career, Yamada will be the final man to attempt the Third Stage, and he will be joined by Hioki, Kawaguchi, Kishimoto, Nagasaki, Lee, Ryo, Kanno and Asa, making 9 in total, more than the last two tournaments combined.
Third Stage
Only the latter two have experience on this version of the Third Stage, and the former three have no Third Stage experience at all, so if I told you there were two clears before Kōji, you'd definitely think Kawaguchi and Ryo, right? Exactly. While Kishimoto became the first to fail the now very feared Vertical Limit, everyone else has fallen at the exact same spot, the Crazy Cliffhanger 180 jump. Clearly the focal point of the stage, Yamada has been watching the others try it and studying their techniques.
He steps up to the start line and is introduced by Hatsuta, then reaches up for an old obstacle, one that he has not faced in nearly a decade, the Rumbling Dice. Still a strength drainer, it has not taken anybody out since its return in SASUKE 28. He doesn't know it, but Yamada has just commenced the final attempt at this obstacle, and just like all the others, the dice pose little issues as they clank and crash along the track, eventually reaching the end as Yamada safely lands on the resting platform.
Next up is an obstacle unfamiliar to the fireman, the Iron Paddler. It seemed difficult as first as everyone had some struggles with it in SASUKE 28 and Morimoto took over a minute on it in SASUKE 29, but the very next run, Kenji Takahashi turned it into a motorcycle and nobody's had issues since. Though he's not quite as fast, Yamada is still able to move through the obstacle relatively easily, only having slight issues with getting under the, er, bar I guess, to get back onto solid ground.
Now, the one obstacle in this Third Stage that is just straight up new, the Drum Hopper. Consisting of five sets of drums placed 1.2 meters apart, it's harder than it looks, and it almost broke Hioki's shoulder earlier in the tournament despite him somehow recovering. Though his transitions aren't perfect and his right hand slips a bit on the third one, Yamada too recovers and after a small bit of struggle, can get back to Earth, which he does, shaking his arms out and smiling. He knows what's coming next.
This obstacle needs no introduction, but for the sake of tradition, I'll give it one anyway. The Crazy Cliffhanger. While it may at first seem like a downgrade given there's only four ledges instead of the Ultimate Cliffhanger's six and the first three are basically a carbon copy of the Cliffhanger Kai, (interestingly enough, the only variant I never wrote about Kōji attempting) the fourth ledge must be lachéd to via getting enough swing on the third ledge to launch yourself 1.8m, while turning 180° in mid-air to actually catch the ledge. Not surprisingly, only four of the 15 attempts at this obstacle have been successful so far, with two fails even coming from the Kai portion, those being Asa in 28 and Kenji Takahashi in 29.
Three of the clears have also come from this tournament, with the only other one being from Morimoto in 29. So while a very tough task, it is doable, and everyone knows it. As Yamada starts the obstacle, the crowd's cheers pick up as the camera cuts between his wife and kids, watching intently on the sidelines. Having attempted the Kai 3 times with two clears, and having massively improved his Cliffhanger skills since 2005, that part is quickly dispatched. Once Yamada gets to the third ledge, he stops his horizontal momentum and starts swinging back and forth, straightening his arms a bit to allow him to swing more freely. He swings forward, then back, then forward again, and on his backswing, he lets go, flying through the air towards that fabled fourth ledge...
And promptly crashing back down to Earth.
As it has done 9 times in the past and will continue to do countless, seemingly endless times, a 180° Cliffhanger transition has ended the run of a very talented player. Shaking his head as he climbs out of the murky waters, Yamada thinks to himself about what went wrong. Sure, his swing was good, but he hadn't given himself enough height, and thus, enough time to react and properly catch the ledge, which the replay gives a clear view of as while his right hand was positioned well, his left hand could barely even touch the ledge, and since he isn't Ryo Matachi, that spells disaster and the end of the run for the 40 year old. Still a very valiant effort and one that ties the record for 40-somethings with Yoshiyuki Okuyama in SASUKE 26.
Aftermath
Since Yamada's fail ended the Third Stage, there was no waiting around, just two Final Stage attempts to watch almost immediately after. The first came from Tomohiro Kawaguchi, the 32-year-old concrete mixer driver. His inexperience showed right away with several slips on the 12m Spider Climb, and though he eventually cleared it, he had under 10 seconds left and timed out only a couple meters up the 12m Tsuna Nobori. In fact, had this been the Golden Era, where the Spider Climb + Tsuna combo originated, he would've failed the Spider Climb via the walls splitting after 15 seconds. Still though, a valiant effort.
This meant the Last Man Standing was the only hope left, 25-year-old Ryo Matachi, the plumber from Kanagawa. With this being his second trip to the Final Stage, expectations were high, and Matachi seemed like he'd meet them, getting off to a far better start on the Spider Climb. Despite a slip-up, he was still able to grab the Tsuna Nobori with almost exactly 18 seconds left, meaning Kanzenseiha was very much on the cards, since during Nagano's win in SASUKE 17, he touched the albeit slightly higher Tsuna Nobori with 19 seconds left.
Sadly, due to a slower start and pace overall, Matachi was unable to make his dream come true, his time expiring about 1.5 meters short of the goal button, even closer than his last attempt. While that brought the tournament to a disappointing end, it was a very successful one, with 38 clears overall and the first breakthrough to the Final Stage since Urushihara's second win. Many believed the Third Stage would receive upgrades after the two clears, and while there would be one new obstacle added there, that wasn't even close to all that good ol' Inui had in store.
I guess even he can throw a curveball every now and again.
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Okay, I swear, the remaining posts will be up much quicker. I'll bet a bag of Cheez-Its on it.
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Post by hoseasasuke on Jul 16, 2024 10:07:22 GMT -5
I look forward to seeing how our man will do in my 2nd favourite tournament, SASUKE 24.
Those immortal words, spoken by a man who many detest, many feel bad for, and many don't know what to think of, run through the bloodstreams of every avid SASUKE fan in the world, whether they know the entire story or not. That quote is joked about, paraphrased, just about everything you can do to a sentence has been done to it.
But at the end of the day, it's what every competitor feels when they walk up to that start line. In that moment, SASUKE is their life, their journey, their death. Nothing else matters when you're on that course. You want one thing, and one thing only. Nobody wants to fail. Nobody wants to see their dream slip away for perhaps the last time. Everyone wants to win. That's no shock. In SASUKE, that goal is very seldomly achieved.
People have lived decades of their lives on a seemingly endless conquest for Kanzenseiha, some have gone farther than others, some have known when to quit, some, well... They try their best, but never get the chance at all. But sometimes... Just sometimes... A certain dog has their day.SASUKE 24It's New Year's Day 2010, and while billions of people around the globe are partying with their friends and family, drinking their beverage of choice, and/or drowning themselves in the false hope that this year will be better than the last one, at Midoriyama, none of that is on peoples' minds. For the 100 competitors that are about to step up to take on the world's toughest obstacle course, as always, they only care about achieving Kanzensei- Oh, hold on, I'm getting a call from my editor. Oookay, it appears we've gotten to the point where 30-40% of the field is just joke competitors or celebrities that are only on SASUKE to revive their dying careers, so, scratch that last point. Still, the SASUKE All-Stars care more than arguably anyone else, and among them is our main man, 36 year old Kōji Yamada. After his and Nagano's Final Stage heartbreaks roughly three months ago, they both know this could be a make or break tournament for them. With one being 36 and the other 37, time may very well be running out. Yamada ends up getting the #98 bib, just after Takeda and just before rising star Hitoshi Kanno (if you're wondering where Hiromichi is, #89) thanks to his massive comeback the previous tournament. As Noboyuki Kishi gets ready to kick off SASUKE 2010, the competing All-Stars (except Katsumi, who is likely off trying to sell his excess cans of SASUKE spray) are seen talking about their potential this tournament. Nagano: I'm a little demotivated, it's a little frustrating getting that close only to fail again. Shingo: But at least we had a great time last tournament! It's been a while since we've all performed like that, I hope we can do it again! Akiyama: Well, I'm still a little worried about facing the Half-Pipe Attack again, it's a brutal obstacle, but with some luck, I'm hoping to get through it. Takeda: I just need to get back to Stage 3 again, last time was painful, and I need to redeem it. Kōji: I'm sure we can get there. As for me, I want another shot at that tower. If I can get back there, I think I can make it. First StageThe stage, while relatively unchanged from the previous tournament, has seen less success this time around, partially because the Americans, who accounted for three clears last time, are nowhere to be found, and partially because, well, it's SASUKE, you never know what will happen. Either way, 12 have advanced so far, including five out of the last six. However, only Takeda has moved on for the All-Stars, thanks to Akiyama and Katsumi failing the Soritatsu Kabe, with the latter fake retiring for the third time, and Yamamoto having arguably the sloppiest run of his career, causing him to run out of time at the Tarzan Rope. On the other side of the spectrum, a few Shin Sedai members have already advanced, those being 28 year old Tomohiro Kawaguchi, 18 year old Jun Satō, 23 year old Naoya Tajima, 25 year old Kouji Hashimoto, and 31 year old Yuuji Urushihara. Muscle Musical member Terukazu Ishikawa also cleared along with Yuji Washimi, Hiromichi, Lee, Okuyama, and Takahashi, but they aren't in a SASUKE group, so M9 didn't care about them. (as we'll soon sadly see) After Takeda's clear, the camera pans to Yamada, and a VTR begins. It shows his previous Final Stage timeout, along with his Slider Jump fail from 22, then cuts to him relentlessly training on a bungee rope in his backyard. He states to the cameraman that if he's able to reach the Final Stage again, he feels he is unstoppable. The VTR ends soon after, and announcer Keisuke Hatsuta introduces Yamada to a huge round of applause. Yamada takes a deep breath and begins his 24th attempt at SASUKE after the beeps, starting with a familiar area, the Jyunidantobi. Like the previous tournament, nobody of note sans Akira Ōmori has had any difficulty, and Yamada breezes through it. The next obstacle is one of two new ones this tournament, and just like its counterpart the Rope Junction, it is completely useless and would be better off in Total Wipeout, it's the X-Bridge. I have literally nothing to say about this, it's a worse version of the Cross Bridge, let's move on. The next challenge is the Log Grip, and while yes, it does it's job and takes out the fodder competitors, it's just like the Jyunidantobi and hasn't eliminated anyone of note in the past three tournaments. Again, Yamada passes it easily to move on to the much harder Jumping Spider. Though nobody knows it at the time, this obstacle will cause objectively a top 2 most shocking fail in SASUKE history just two runs later, with Nagano's slip only being rivaled by Urushihara's Pipe Slider mishap nearly ten years later. Being one of the few to attempt this obstacle several times and never be defeated by it, it surprises nobody when Yamada sticks the landing and traverses through the Spider Walk portion of the obstacle. Once he dismounts, he comes to the Half-Pipe Attack. This obstacle essentially ended Yamamoto's run just two runs prior, and would do the same to Kanno mere minutes later, with both taking three swings and perhaps being shaken up by it. However, Yamada only needs one swing, and safely lands to run up and face the Soritatsu Kabe. Unlike most previous tournaments, Yamada isn't able to scale the wall in one go, and has to regroup. Thankfully though, his second try is a success, and he still has a comfortable ~50 seconds to go as he reaches the Slider Jump. Though it did take him out less than a year prior, the obstacle has been significantly nerfed, and it has showed as nobody of note bar Paul Anthony Terek has failed it in the last two tournaments. Yamada takes a breath and slides down the track, lets go of the bar, and... Makes the grab. Climbing his way over the cargo net, Yamada can breathe a sigh of relief, as there are still 30 seconds as he approaches the Tarzan Rope. A swing and a short climb later, Yamada smiles and bows before smacking the finish buzzer with 11.62 seconds to go, moving on to the Second Stage for the second straight time, and becoming the 13th and ultimately final person that made it through. You all know the story with Nagano and Kanno, so I'm not gonna beat the dead horse. There's still more stories to develop. Infact, Nagano's fail is arguably only number three on the list of memorable moments from this tournament. Second Stage
Thanks to Yamada being the last runner for the first time in his career, he's gotten to witness the entire stage, and thus has seen the mixed bag of results. On the good side, Tajima, Hashimoto, Lee, Urushihara, Takahashi, Okuyama, and Takeda all cleared, but unfortunately, Satō fell victim to the Salmon Ladder, Kawaguchi the Unstable Bridge, and Ishikawa, Washimi and Hiromichi all were defeated by the Metal Spin. Still, a decent clear rate, with 7/12 advancing, and again, five of the last six. Yamada looks to join them, and gets some words of encouragement from Takeda before his run. T: How are you feeling about it? K: Same as usual, honestly. A little nervous, but nothing I can't get through. My main concern is the Unstable Bridge now being placed directly after the Salmon Ladder. Also not happy to see the Balance Tank back, that thing's almost taken me out a couple times. T: Well, are you gonna let the other Koji beat you for a second time? Kōji chuckles, smiling earnestly at Takeda's typical wit, then the camera cuts after to Yamada at the gate, and his theme plays as he is introduced by Fumiyasu Satō. He steps up to the Downhill Jump, stepping on the board and commencing what will ultimately be the last attempt on it. [Hello, this is KojiFan's editor again. They mention the whole "last attempt" thing more, so, instead of letting you read it every time, I'm just gonna keep a counter for every obstacle Yamada is the last to attempt. Cool? Cool. Also, whenever you see [] around text, it's me.] The timer starts, and Yamada takes off, sliding down the track and grabbing onto the rope, then swinging back before dismounting safely, and going up to face the Salmon Ladder. [2] Being a veteran on this obstacle, Yamada has zero issues with the first couple rungs, going up them smoothly. The penultimate rung, he pauses on for a moment, but after a couple seconds, he pulls the bar up and lands it on the final set of rungs. However, the Stick Slider is gone this tournament, so Yamada must go directly into the Unstable Bridge. Inching his way along the four chained board, Yamada keeps his eyes on his hands, making sure they're even. He shuffles across the board bit by bit until he gets to the end, then prepares to transition to the second board. He takes a swing back, then forward, reaches his hands over, and holds on, grabbing the two chained board easily. A few seconds later, he's at the platform, and manages to avoid making the same mistake Urushihara and Kawaguchi made in the past, making sure he's safe before dismounting. The next obstacle is a returning one, it hasn't been seen in three years, but Yamada still has experience on it, it's the Balance Tank. Though it hasn't done anything this tournament, it has shown it can do lethal damage, as Katsumi and Bunpei Shiratori [dang, he hasn't been mentioned like, at all, huh?] will gladly tell you. Having been previously scared by this obstacle, Yamada takes a second to gather himself, then steps on the tank and gets it rolling. Slowly but surely, Yamada reaches his target, and grabs on to the rope, pulling himself to safety and hopping down to face the Metal Spin. With more time than the previous tournament, still a comfortable 29 seconds, Yamada can afford to prepare himself. He takes a breath, gets a good run-up, jumps, and grabs on to the chain, hanging on for dear life as he spins around, and breathes a sign of relief as he makes it to the other side. Still with 21 seconds, the Wall Lifting will not be an issue, and one, two, three, the walls go over the fireman's head. He slaps the red button with a comfortable 08.18 left on the clock, making it 8 in the Third Stage. And... Wow, for once, I don't have anything else to say, there's no runs left. Alright, well, moving on! Third Stage
Man... I've been dreading talking about this stage for a while. Yes, a nearly unprecedented 5 out of 7 cleared before Yamada, but those two fails... Where do I start? The first was from Tajima, who had a mental lapse on the Gliding Ring that I can't even explain in words, and the second... Well, you know the story, even if you just started watching SASUKE a week ago. I don't even want to talk about it, but I have to. [no, you don't] Takeda, who was previously 0/12 on the Third Stage, made it all the way to the Spider Flip, but clearly exhausted, his arms have out on him before he could climb up the first board. The 13th and final Third Stage fail of Takeda's career, it is objectively the saddest. Nevertheless, after Takeda apologised to his fellow All-Stars, Yamada still went to talk to his good friend, with the hopes he could cheer him up, at least a little. K: Hey, how do you feel? T: Well, I've certainly had better days. K: Look, I know it's hard. I can't blame you for feeling like this. But you can keep trying, even if someone achieves Kanzenseiha tonight, that won't define your career forever. T: I know, I guess it just hurts knowing I've had more chances then anybody, and I've failed more than anybody. K: I understand. Still, this moment doesn't have to define your career. That's up to you. Takeda slightly smiles. T: Yeah, maybe you're right. Thank you. Kōji gives Takeda a pat on the back, then heads up the steps to start his 12th attempt on the Third Stage as his theme plays, along with a VTR of his previous Third Stage clear. After that ends, Yamada takes a deep breath and starts his attempt on the Arm Rings. [3] Easily making his way along the track, Yamada has no issues with the obstacle, to nobody's surprise. One challenge down, but the next obstacle is a new one. What is it again? Oh yeah... Yep, the Rope Junction. For once, I'm just straight up not gonna talk about this obstacle. It exists, I'll admit that, but it is useless. I mean, do you really think anyone, let alone a firefighter, is gonna fail it? No? Didn't think so. Swing, swing, swing, he dismounts, yay. Moving on... Next up is the Devil Steps, a relatively easy obstacle given its placement, and it hasn't taken anyone out since the very first attempt at it from Daisuke Miyazaki. [4] Yamada has no issues with the ascending steps, reaching the top with a steady pace, then he switches directions and descends, keeping his rhythm. Left, right, left, right, he descends the remaining steps and makes it safely to the platform, shaking his arms out and preparing to face the Shin-Cliffhanger. Though it was once the most feared obstacle of the stage if not the entire course, nobody not named Levi has failed it in the last two tournaments, and nobody at all has failed the jump to the third ledge since Okuyama back in SASUKE 22. Expectations are high as Yamada starts the Shin-Cliffhanger, [5] and easily makes his way across the first two ledges. Swinging side to side as he makes it to the apex of the second ledge, Yamada looks more focused then ever before as he reaches over... And thankfully, he safely lands on the third ledge, making the other All-Stars breathe a sigh of relief on the sidelines. Yamada steps down into the platform, having completed half of the Third Stage. He doesn't even crack a smile, he's completely in the zone now. In his mind, this is not about him anymore. This is for his friends that have supported him since day one. This is for his family. This is for his fellow All-Stars. This is for Takeda. Now, as Yamada enters the back half of the stage, his first challenge is one he's all too familiar with, the Jumping Bars. He first attempted them all the way back in SASUKE 15, where he came one bar away from being only the second person to clear them, but in his two subsequent attempts at them, he has had no issues. [6] He jumps out to the first bar and swings, back and forth, then leaps out and grabs the second bar. He repeats the process again, and again, until the grabs on to the last bar, and switches directions, another obstacle done. Next on Yamada's checklist is the Hang Climbing, another obstacle that hasn't taken anyone out apart from the first to try it. In this case, it was Takeda, back in SASUKE 21. However, since then, competitors seemed to have figured out the path, and nobody's even shown signs of struggling since. Yamada still looks laser focused as he climbs up the angled board, steadily climbing up, and not even seeming fatigued one bit. His face doesn't change whatsoever as he hooks his hands on to the Spider Flip. [7] All noise in Midoriyama seemingly evaporates, apart from the wind. The competitors on the sidelines, their families, their friends, and even the announcer, Ogasawara, are dead silent. They know what's at stake here. They all saw what just happened, they were there to witness the tragedy first-hand. Some closed their eyes, fearing for what would happen if Yamada were to fall now. Infact, one could argue that at this point in SASUKE history, there has never been more on the line than during this run right here. A slight wave of relief washes over the crowd as Yamada stands at the edge of the Spider Flip's first board, preparing to make the jump across. What many tend to forget is that this jump right here may have also taken away Takeda's last chance to make the Final Stage by defeating him in SASUKE 23. Not only that, but with five finalists already, a win is all but assured. The inevitable renewal will set everyone back to square one, and as we'll later see, it killed any chance Takeda had of making the Third Stage, let alone the tower. This jump, more than ever, had to be a good one. Takeda had to be avenged. Yamada looks out to the second board and his legs start bouncing up and down as he prepares for the leap. He gives himself a countdown in his head, three, two, one, then he leaps... ... On the sidelines, Nagano's head goes into his hands, but not out of despair like one would think. He just can not watch what's happening. Yamada made the jump, and traverses down to the green resting bar. He is one obstacle away. All that stands between him and his third shot at the Final Stage, not to mention his second consecutive one, is the Gliding Ring. [8] He takes as much time as he can get to rest his arms, then grabs on to the ring. Avoiding the mistake Tajima made, he lifts it over the stopper, then begins the slide down. Once he reaches the end, he kicks back, then forward, building as much momentum as he can. He knows what can happen if you rush, but he also knows he needs all the arm strength he can get to reserve for the Final Stage if he gets there. He takes one swing, two, three, and then, once again, all of Midoriyama is silent. In this moment, there is no control. Yamada's hands are off the ring. He now has to just hope he has enough momentum to land safely, or he could very well become the second All-Star named Yamada to blow his last chance at the Final Stage by being mere centimetres short of a dismount. Katsumi himself is intently watching on the sidelines along with everyone else, but like Yamada, they can not do anything. SASUKE is a battle of one person versus all the obstacles. As much as they may try, nobody that isn't the competitor themself can help them. Right now, that seems more clear then ever. The only thing the spectators can do is just that, spectate... And then erupt into cheers. The All-Stars jump out of their seats, the Shin Sedai clap and cheer, and Yamada himself collapses on the mat, a smile clearly visible on his stunned face. For the second time in a row, he's done what he hadn't been able to do for a decade. For the second time ever, there will be six challengers on the Final Stage, and for the second time, Yamada is one of them. It doesn't seem possible. Nobody's supposed to make the Final Stage a decade after they did initially. [except Morimoto but y'know] Yet, that's exactly what's happened. Twice. Now, all that's left to do is wait. FINAL STAGEAs any hardcore SASUKE fan will tell you, the five runs preceding Yamada's truly represent the good, the bad, and the ugly of SASUKE. The good? Shin Sedai leader Yuuji Urushihara made the climb and became the third Grand Champion with 3.5 seconds left, roughly an eight-second improvement over his SASUKE 22 attempt and a truly triumphant moment. The bad? Lee En-Chih and Okuyama came nowhere near winning and their runs wouldn't have been dramatic even if they had 50 seconds. The ugly? Well, all I need to say is "safety rope" to make any Kongu fan's blood boil. [oh yeah and Hashimoto got close, dunno how you forgot to mention that one, KojiFan] However, that's all in the past now. There is one run left, from our main man, Kōji Yamada. Before the safety harness is put on and he gets in position, he gets a chance to talk to the All-Stars. Nagano: Do you feel ready for this? Kōji: I'm as ready as I'll ever be. It definitely helps that I stood here recently. Nagano: Okay, the towel's there. Brace yourself! Yamada gets the ceremonial backslap, then takes a deep breath. Shingo: Good luck on that thing! Takeda: We'll be waiting down here for you. Akiyama: Of course, we're all rooting for you. Katsumi: Yes, we wish you luck. Kōji: Thank you. I just hope my training pays off. No matter what happens, I'll have given it my all. He walks up to the Final Stage, ready to challenge his new nemesis. He takes a look up as he is strapped into his harness, prepared for his final battle. All that's left is for announcer Keisuke Hatsuta to introduce him, and then, for the second time in roughly 100 days, arguably the most important forty seconds of Yamada's life will commence. H: Finally, we have arrived, at the final run of the tournament. 98 have fallen to the demons of Midoriyama, however, Urushihara showed the remaining challengers the way. Okuyama and Lee En-Chih could not follow in his footsteps, now there is only one man remaining. Making this third Final Stage appearance, and his second one in a row, it's 36 year old Gifu firefighter, Kōji Yamada. He is in position, he says he has been training, he says he is prepared. But now, that will all be put to the test. Just 40 seconds for him to climb 23 meters to victory. Can he do it? It is now time to find out! boom...
BOOM...BOOM!!!!As the third tone sounds, Yamada immediately takes off, climbing up the Heavenly Ladder for the second time. He maintains a very steady rhythm, seemingly floating up the 13-meter ladder even as it shakes back and forth, doing everything it can to throw him off his game. Now more than ever though, he can not mess up even once. He knows he can't replicate Urushihara's pace on the G-Rope, he just can't afford to lose any time before it. So far, he hasn't, infact he's ahead of Urushihara's time by the slimmest of margins and he reaches the 10-meter mark. The last three are basically the crossing of Ts and dotting of Is, then, it's all down to the G-Rope. He's completely on it by the time the clock hits 24.5 seconds, almost exactly where Urushihara was. All he needs now is just enough push to get him up the meters in that amount of time. However, fatigue killed his two previous Final Stage attempts, leaving him within sight of the button. But, he'd been training to counteract exactly that, fatigue. Surely it couldn't happen again... Could it? Yamada's fellow competitors cheer him on as they watch him go up, and up, keeping a steady rhythm. As Yamada predicted, he quickly falls of Urushihara's pace, but not by much. However, once he reaches 17 meters, a terrifying sight is caught by one of the camera angles. Yamada has a clear grimace on his face, it seems the long course has once again taken its toll, but still, he keeps fighting. He can't let another chance slip away, he must pull through. At approximately 18.5 meters, the ten-second warning sounds. Yamada's arms are burning, screaming out to stop, but that just isn't an option. Not when you're so, so close. If you've ever been running laps in the gym, you know how this feels. Your 9-year-old legs can't handle it, you feel like you're about to throw up, you're tired of your gym coach yelling at you, and you just want to go to the nurse and say you have some made-up disease just to get out of it. But when you're at that last stretch, sometimes, you get a burst of energy you didn't know you had. You go full sprint, Sonic the Hedgehog mode, and during those few seconds, you look like you could go on for hours. With only 7 seconds left and Yamada's head just now touching the 20 meter mark, he's gonna need to go full 9-year-old in the gym mode. Six, five, four, the seconds tick down mercilessly, but Yamada does find that last reserve of strength, pushing himself up as if the laws of gravity or the human body in general don't apply to him. He can see the goal once again, but he can also hear the klaxon. He can't see the timer from his angle, but he knows it goes off six times before the dreaded timeout gunshot. Having just heard it for the fifth time, and just now getting his head level with the ring, his body goes into autopilot. As if he were reaching out for the cord on his parachute while skydiving, his left arm reaches up to attempt to hit the button. His eyes, however, are looking at the rope, not the button. This is not something anyone before him has done. This is not what Nagano did in SASUKE 12, 23, or even 13, this is not what any of the champions have done. Yamada is reaching up for the button, completely blind. His fellow competitors on the sidelines can not tell. Yamada is too far up for them to see where he's looking. They can only see his lower body, the rest is blocked by the tower itself. All they know is that there is merely one second left. Yamada himself finally seems to realise what his body is doing, and looks up at his hand... ... ... ... Just in time to see it land perfectly on the button. The smoke goes off, everyone on the sidelines starts clapping, the All-Stars jump around and hug each other like New England Patriots fans after Super Bowl 51, and Hatsuta gleefully shouts out " KANZENSEIHA!!!!" As for the man himself, Yamada takes exactly enough time to make sure he's completely on solid ground before letting go of the rope and bursting into tears of joy. With a mere 00.77 seconds showing on the timer, Kōji Yamada had finally done it. After 12 years, 24 tournaments, and 23 heartbreaks, not to mention the times he watched his friends fail, he had caught his whale. He can't even stand, he is in total disbelief. After almost a minute of tears, Yamada is finally able to compose himself and stand up at the top of the tower, looking down at the course he had finally managed to conquer. He waves to everyone and puts his head down briefly before yelling out to thank everyone, and being given a standing ovation. Once that ends, as Yamada gets ready to descend the tower, he hears Hatsuta's voice and looks back, standing next to the rails. H: Congratulations, Yamada-san! Run me through how you're feeling right now. K: Oh, I can't even... I can't explain it. It's like, this feeling of pride, but also, I feel like I did this for the other competitors, especially my fellow All-Stars. Hitting the button felt amazing, but seeing all of them down there so happy made it even better. It's like, this isn't just for me. H: So I know you've been here since the start, only competitor aside from Shingo-san to attend every single competition. Do you feel like you still have that fire, that drive to continue competing? K: Of course. Sure, this is more than likely the peak of my career, and I suppose I could go out on a high note, but... SASUKE, to me, is about much more than results. It's about the community, everyone here is amazing to compete and talk with. It's about the feeling of success you get just by standing on the start line. Most importantly, it's about my family, my kids. Above all, I want them to be happy, and I know they love watching me compete here. And I love competing here myself. It's an amazing experience. H: I think I speak for everyone when I say you're a joy to have in this competition, and ironically given your occupations, your bond with Toshihiro brings a certain fire to these tournaments. My final question is this: When looking at the results of the All-Stars, it's clear that as a whole there's been less consistency amongst them after Nagano-san's Kanzenseiha, with the 22nd tournament being the first time none made it past the First Stage. With the Shin Sedai up and coming, do you think the All-Stars can keep up with the Shin Sedai? K: Well, I will say that they're very strong competitors, as Urushihara-san proved earlier. Kanno-san, Satō-san, Tajima-san, I believe they have as much potential as anybody. As for us, I believe we still have a few more tournaments left, but eventually, the torch has to be passed on. Everybody ages, but no matter what happens, I'll always respect the Shin Sedai and any future generations, even after they surpass us. H: Sincere words, Yamada-san. Again, I congratulate you on your victory, and I cannot wait to see you again. Thank you very much for your time. K: Thank you, I can't wait to be back here. Thank you very much. Yamada descends the tower and is immediately mobbed by the All-Stars once he is back on Earth. That, he expected, but when the All-Stars lift him up and start carrying him, he knows exactly what's about to happen, something which he was not prepared for. Just like Nagano seven tournaments prior, despite his playful pleas, Yamada is tossed into the Third Stage's water pit and joined soon after by Urushihara, with the two congratulating each other as the SASUKE ending theme plays, bringing the most successful tournament in history to a close. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Massive shoutout to sasukewarrior333, he did most of the dialogue for me. Can't thank you enough, mate.I know I'm almost a year late but Koji clearing the Final Stage is a very realistic ending. Ladders and ropes are child's play for a firefighter, hence why Takeda never getting there is such a huge what if. Great writing! |
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Sept 8, 2024 15:17:38 GMT -5
- 31 [and its rebalancing of the course to Koji's logical benefit imo],
Some clichés, maybe a quote or two from some 11th century astronomer, yada yada, the usual?
Well, if you wanted those, I'm sorry, we're sold out.
I could go into a lot of stuff here, but what's the point? Kōji's won, he's proved it wasn't a fluke, he's had a resurgence after a slump, his friends have been doing well, what else is there to do? For once, he doesn't need to think about anything. No possible end of SASUKE from 27, no forced retirement from 28, no nearly lethal Backstream from 29, none of the retirement considerations he was having before 30. It's just SASUKE now. It's what he's been doing for nearly 18 years, longer than some of you have been alive. It's something he can enjoy, and do so with a lot of people who share his same passion.
Just go out there and have some fun, pal.SASUKE 31Given the overwhelming success from last tournament, changes were expected, and they were given. The major ones have mostly come in the First Stage, where three new obstacles have been added, the Rolling Hill, Orugoru, and Tackle. The Second Stage has added a new Salmon Ladder variant, and the Third Stage has a new obstacle of it's own as well. We'll cross those bridges when we get to them, but there's one that has to be dealt with, as the Rolling Hill happens to be the very first obstacle. Kōji and Shingo both look at it, then at each other with a bit of a chuckle, talking about the obstacle, which just so happens to be a combination of very old obstacles, the Maruta Nobori and Maruta Kudari, the latter of which the two are the only ones competing today that have attempted it.
S: Now isn't that a nice surprise?
K: Honestly reminds me of the 25th tournament, wasn't that the one with all the old stuff?
S: I think so.
T: What, the hill there?
S: Yes, that was from the very old competitions. Both of them too, they combined I think.
T: Oh, that should be easy then!
K: Yeah, I'm more worried about the other stuff.
N: Agreed. The First Stage usually doesn't have anything too tough though.
S: Yeah, besides, we all cleared last time anyway, we got this!
The four split ways after to get their numbers, with Shingo and Takeda being #92 and #93, Nagano at #97 and Kōji at #99, right after double champ Urushihara, and right before two-time Finalist and SASUKE 30's best performer, Ryo Matachi.
First Stage
As usual, pretty much all of the stage passes before Kōji's run, and if I had to sum it up in a word - disappointing. Yes, 16 have cleared, but look at the people not among them. Shingo and Takeda both failed the Rolling Hill's dismount, marking the first and only time they've ever failed the first obstacle, Nagano and Yuuji both timed out on the Warped Wall thanks to fatigue from the new Tackle, and even Shunsuke Nagasaki, who had only failed the First Stage once, ever, (in SK19 nonetheless) was slowed by it enough to time out on the Lumberjack Climb.
Among those who cleared were 5 rookies, including Anastase Ragivaru, who cleared with the fastest time and immediately got a massive fan club from the viewers. Other successful runs came from Kenji Takahashi with the slowest clear of his career at just 01.06, another time crunch from Masashi Hioki, who only had 00.12, and SASUKE 29's best performer, Yūsuke Morimoto. The focus now shifts to Kōji, who is standing on the start line, ready for his introduction from Kengo Komada.
KK: Every night that Midoriyama appears, its challenges just get harder. The players rise above them, they are defeated, and occasionally they completely conquer the iron castle. Only four have ever done so, and this next challenger is one. Please welcome a man with perfect SASUKE attendance, working as a firefighter in Gifu's Gujo department, a SASUKE All-Star, 41 year old Kōji Yamada!
He gives a small fist-pump to the crowd and to his family, who have come to support him every time they possibly could, before beginning his quest for a second win. Starting off is the Rolling Hill, a combination of the Maruta Nobori and Kudari respectively. As Shingo and Takeda just showed, it is not to be overlooked despite being the first obstacle, and Yamada approaches it with the respect it deserves. Hopping up the first part is no issue, but once he gets to the top, perhaps a bit shaken, he descends slowly, taking almost ten seconds to actually get to the bottom.
His slow but safe approach does work though, and just like that, he's already guaranteed to be at least the second-best All-Star this tournament. The next obstacle he can be much more confident with, the Log Grip. Making its final appearance in this competition, the nerfs made to it in SASUKE 29 have dramatically reduced its difficulty, allowing Yamada to breeze through it and move on to the second new obstacle, and the only one that he'll have never seen anything like it before.
Named the "Orugoru", it is a rotating cylinder with a bunch of thin, circular holds competitors can use to keep their balance and maneuver across with. Surprisingly difficult for such a simple looking obstacle, it's eliminated 18 of the 66 competitors to attempt it, including a then-unknown Yusuke Suzuki, and two-time Second Stager Koki Someya. Knowing that he has time to make up due to his slow approach on the Rolling Hill, Yamada climbs onto the obstacle without wasting a breath, moving across at a steady pace until he reaches the end, at which point he turns slightly and jumps down to the landing platform, safely back on the ground.
The Jump Hang Kai is next, and though trampolines have never been Yamada's best friend, he successfully makes the jump for the fourth and final time, traversing sideways across the right-hand net. With about 70 seconds on the clock, Yamada can charge right into the next obstacle, figuratively and literally. Though he's never attempted the third and last new obstacle in this stage, he has seen it, but only once. Making its return after over 15 years and being the first obstacle to be in two different stages, the Tackle from SASUKE 5 has been upgraded and placed as the fifth obstacle.
Seeing as Yamada failed the First Stage back then, it never got an introduction, so this is its time. The old version was one box, weighing 50kg, that must be pushed down a track. Not so difficult, but this new version now has three boxes, weighing 140, 160, and 180kg respectively for a total of 480kg, [~1056 lbs if anyone was wondering] much harder than before. Though it's only directly taken out one victim, it's tired out many more, resulting in a lot of timeouts, and as I alluded to earlier, lots of close clears from the ones who have succeeded.
Of course, the obstacle isn't lethal at all, it is a relatively easy-looking clear for Yamada, but that's not the point. You see, pushing heavy boxes forward requires lots of leg strength, and thus your legs become tired. Which, you know, is kind of a problem when the next obstacle is the Soritatsu Kabe, and not just that, but one that's been raised to its biggest height ever, 5.5 meters from base to top. Still, with just over 50 seconds as he reaches the obstacle, Yamada has time to spare for a couple attempts if he needs them.
His first go at it comes up short, not a bad effort and one that would have been good on any other wall height, but not today. As he slides back to the base, he shakes his arms and legs out, taking a breather to regroup himself and prepare for his second try. Time is still fine, with around 40 seconds left as Yamada takes off again and reaches up, but to no avail. Another failed attempt as both Yamada's time and energy get lower, and the camera cuts to the other All-Stars, mainly Nagano, shouting the time and telling Kōji to not give up.
He doesn't seem to notice, locked in the wall that's been his nightmare before. A third attempt is his best one yet, getting mere centimeters away from the top, but SASUKE is sadly not horseshoes. At this point, the clock is now under 30 seconds, and knowing that his clear hopes are fading, Yamada starts to show some frustration, smacking on the base of the wall after he's turned back. The fourth attempt comes without rest or much thought, and it's not even close this time. Yamada's breaths get heavier as he smacks the wall again. The frustration only mounts as Kōji hears a "Ni-ju byou!" from the crowd, meaning he's all but finished even if he does get over, which is seeming less and less likely.
Again he tries, and again his hand doesn't quite reach the top, seeming stuck in the same 20cm area as to how far he can get. As the wall rejects him for the fifth me that day, Yamada can't help but let a small shout of frustration leave him. Nothing near what the other Yamada would do 7 years later, but enough to spark a bit of surprise from the competitors close enough to hear the anger from the normally calm and collected Kōji.
Now if I may sidetrack, don't you just love looking at a starry sky? It's calming, you can let your mind wander, you can just enjoy the quiet beauty of nature. Looking up at a night sky really is a wonderful thing... unless there's a 5.5-meter high wall in the way. A wall that no matter what you do, you just can not get away from it.
The klaxon starting to blare is just another factor adding on to the brutal moment, and Yamada takes what many would call a "F*** it" attempt, not even coming close as he didn't even bother with a proper run-up or jump, resulting in yet another double-handed slap to the base of the wall and another small yell.
Yamada goes into his seventh and last attempt as the seconds tick down, again not even really coming close. As the timeout gunshot goes off, the camera cuts to Ryo taking a deep breath and shaking his head to get yet another Soritatsu Kabe fail out of his mind, then to the disappointed All-Stars, then to Yuuji shaking his head, seemingly in disbelief that an obstacle most veterans could do relatively easily has just taken out all three competing champions back-to-back-to-back.
Afterwards, it cuts back to a dejected Yamada, sitting at the base of the wall and looking up at the top. After such a good run last tournament, to have his resurgence blocked by an obstacle he'd attempted 20+ times just hurts. He of course knew this had to do with the Tackle, but rational thinking is not on the cards right now. He doesn't move for about a minute, staring directly at the top of the wall as a gloomy failure theme plays throughout the entire scene. Not even the announcer, Kengo Komada, whose job is literally to simply speak words, can think of anything. There is nothing to say. Not for Yamada, not for Nagano, not for Ryo, whose own run would cement the legacy of this First Stage. Not for anyone.
Sometimes, the silence is deafening.
Aftermath
After Yamada collected himself enough to get off the wall, Ryo Matachi met the exact same fate as the previous three runners, tired out by the Tackle enough to fail the Soritatsu Kabe, leaving 16 for the Second Stage. 7 cleared, including Takahashi for the last time, former finalists Hitoshi Kanno and Tomohiro Kawaguchi, the usually fast Kazuma Asa with a career low 3.3 seconds left, and Morimoto with the fastest time, avenging his Wall Lifting timeout from the previous tournament.
The Third Stage saw two modifications in the introduction of the Sidewinder, four poles that competitors must cling to and leap across, and a second ledge added to the already dangerous Vertical Limit. The first three competitors all failed the Crazy Cliffhanger, before Morimoto was able to break through and clear the entire stage, becoming the first finalist that day and once again avenging a late fail, this time his Pipe Slider mishap on 29.
Asa ran next and was defeated by the Crazy Cliffhanger for the fourth straight time, while Kanno was able to defeat it on his own fourth attempt, but after celebrating wildly and probably expending lots of valuable energy doing so, he was promptly defeated between the ledges of the modified Vertical Limit. Kawaguchi was last to run, and in a huge shock, he as well failed the Crazy Cliffhanger due to lowering one of his hands below the final ledge, leaving just the 23-year-old Morimoto to take on the Final, which remained the same at a 12m Spider Climb and a 12m Tsuna.
Morimoto stood in front of the countless people watching, the other competitors, his family, the fans, the people in that weird booth thing, and promptly delivered an incredible performance, flying up the Spider Climb with unprecedented speed and climbing the Tsuna Nobori to his final destination, never slowing down until he reached the top and was able to hit the button with 02.59 seconds left, becoming just the fifth person to ever achieve Kanzenseiha and putting an end to the RISING era of SASUKE after a mere four tournaments.
Of course, when one door closes, another opens. Morimoto's win only meant a new course, a renewal course at that, for 100 more people to take on. And I am not joking when I say that this new course, even 8 years later, would seem impossible to fans and competitors alike. And the man who caused it wouldn't even be there.
What a power move.
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Sometimes I wonder how it would be had the Wall stayed this height. Probably not well.
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Post by ChiBiJKT48 on Sept 8, 2024 18:17:13 GMT -5
The old version was two boxes, both of which weighed 50kg, that must be pushed down a track. Forgive me because I didn't read this thread before so I might miss if you did tweaks, but, isn't Tackle Machine just feature one box? |
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Sept 8, 2024 19:20:29 GMT -5
The old version was two boxes, both of which weighed 50kg, that must be pushed down a track. Forgive me because I didn't read this thread before so I might miss if you did tweaks, but, isn't Tackle Machine just feature one box? Checked it, apparently it was. Dunno how I derped on that, thank you.  |
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Post by zoran on Sept 10, 2024 13:02:21 GMT -5
Why do you think Koji wouldn't get dqed on the Swap Salmon Ladder in 29 and 30 given how poor his salmon ladder attempt was in 19, his failure on a swinging obstacle in the past (15, the SSL is a vertical and harder version of the jumping bars) and he has shown he can make shock mistakes under time pressure (17)?
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Post by dakohosu on Sept 11, 2024 12:12:28 GMT -5
Why do you think Koji wouldn't get dqed on the Swap Salmon Ladder in 29 and 30 given how poor his salmon ladder attempt was in 19, his failure on a swinging obstacle in the past (15, the SSL is a vertical and harder version of the jumping bars) and he has shown he can make shock mistakes under time pressure (17)? 1) It's an alternate reality/timeline 2) There's enough time between those tournaments for him to have trained any outstanding weaknesses and for those earlier fails to not really be indicative of how he'd do several years later. Washimi went from failing the Salmon Ladder twice to clearing it easily, Takeda went from clearing it several times to never being able to pass it again despite multiple attempts. I'd also say Koji's SL attempt in 19 was pretty good considering it was a new concept and he was one of the first competitors to do it the "normal" way rather than the swinging technique that even Nagano used in 18. He probably would've cleared the obstacle if he hadn't got the bar lopsided which was a freak error. I'd say a poor attempt is where someone has really bad technique or doesn't have enough strength to make the required transition distance, like a load of the noob Salmon Ladder fails in 33-34 for example i.e. even if everything goes their way they'll still fail it. Re the swinging issue, he failed the Jumping Bars in 15 but then cleared it in 16; granted, it was an easier version but his technique was noticeably better (the reason his grip gave out in 15 is he was taking multiple swings per lache and also sweaty hands from the heat), which shows he has the capability to address weaknesses on the fly. His Devil Balanco struggle was because he ran before Bunpei so didn't know the correct technique, yet was still the first person to clear it over 3 tournaments, despite that also requiring swinging. So the capability for improvement over a course of 8-9 years on specific weaknesses is pretty high considering he overcame his previous hurdle in a matter of a few months. |
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Post by katoshiho on Sept 12, 2024 3:23:55 GMT -5
- 30 [ Only 5 people aged 40 or older have ever cleared the First Stage up to this point, with those being 44 year old Kiyomi Inoue all the way back in SASUKE 1, 40 year old Hidenori Nagasawa in SASUKE 16, 41 year old Bunpei Shiratori in SASUKE 21, Hiromichi Satō in 22 and 24 at the ages of 40 and 41 respectively, and while Yoshiyuki Okuyama cleared in 26, 27 and 29 while being 40, 41 and 43, that's it.] No other 40 year old has ever cleared, and Okuyama is the only one of those who has reached the Third Stage.] Sorry to interrupt but, Wacky also cleared in SASUKE 29 when he is 40 years old. (I know he also clear it in SASUKE 30) |
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Post by hatkun on Sept 14, 2024 2:22:05 GMT -5
Let’s go!!! I can’t believe this series has been running after all the time I’ve been gone! I’m definitely going to have to read through on all of this and see how Yamada has been doing. I just updated my Kane series finally, so hopefully I can start posting regularly again.
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Sept 14, 2024 7:48:03 GMT -5
Let’s go!!! I can’t believe this series has been running after all the time I’ve been gone! I’m definitely going to have to read through on all of this and see how Yamada has been doing. I just updated my Kane series finally, so hopefully I can start posting regularly again. I'd love that, I've just read your newest post and it's honestly incredible, the dialogue is second to none and you really capture the emotions of SASUKE as a whole, especially for someone competing not just for himself. As for me, I've gotten all the way through SASUKE 31, and I can say I think you'll like a lot of the newer ones. Without spoiling too much, I've recently been focusing more on the things SASUKE makes people feel too. That said, great to have you back, and I heavily look forward to seeing how Kane and Shane's journeys unfold! |
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Post by hatkun on Oct 15, 2024 18:12:12 GMT -5
I just finished reading through all of the runs so far, and wow, let me just say, you sell yourself way too short as a writer. Our styles are definitely different as I’m more of the sappy sentimentalist while you have sardonic one liners in spades, but I think both styles can work equally well in the right hands, and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed reading through all this and watching Kōji grow throughout the years. His friendship with Takeda (and later with Shingo), the way Shingo tried to cheer him up the first time Takeda missed a tournament, just the general bond the All-Stars share and the little conversations they have, is something so wholesome and definitely something I wish I had done before, but will try to incorporate more from now on.
I laughed, I cried, and when he finally won it all, what a beautiful moment. I’ve loved all of it. Well done 🙂
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Nov 9, 2024 18:56:52 GMT -5
- 32 [if only for the dialogue and Nagano's retirement],
I don't know who invented them, and though I could probably find out via a quick Google search, there's something about not knowing that's just alluring to me.
The word in and of itself has expanded beyond just some goofy theme park ride every 8 year old pretends to want to go on though. It's now just anything that goes back and forth, bad to good, one extreme to the other.
For Kōji Yamada, for almost 19 years, that rollercoaster has been SASUKE.
From the initial highs of his four straight First Stage clears, to a small slump he experienced in the middle of the Golden Era, to his resurgence in Shin-SASUKE and eventual Kanzenseiha, to his decline where he didn't touch the Third Stage for four years, to his subsequent return to it in SASUKE 30, and finally to his anguish on the Soritatsu Kabe last tournament that he shared with two of his fellow Grand Champions, and someone who seemed almost destined to become number five had he not met the same fate.
You'd think over that time span and all those different outcomes, you'd have seen it all. You'd experience every heartbreak, every triumph, every emotion in between. You'd have to figure at some point, that's what Kōji thought. That no matter what happened in SASUKE, he'd have seen it before.
Say what you will, nobody ever realizes what other people are thinking.SASUKE 32It's May 28, 2016, and 100 challengers from all professions, all parts of Japan, and even other places across the globe, have gathered for SASUKE 32, the first tournament following Yūsuke "SASUKE-kun" Morimoto's Kanzenseiha a year ago. Like the other tournaments following a win, the course has been heavily modified, with literally half of the 26 areas being either new or modified. Under any normal circumstances, that would be the big story of the tournament.
These, however, are not normal circumstances.
While Shingo, Takeda and Kōji are all treating this like any other tournament, for the leader of the All-Stars, Makoto Nagano, he intends this to be his final one. After 15 years, 26 tournaments, 5 Final Stage attempts, 1 win, and 4 runs ended via poor obstacle design, he's decided to call it quits, and can be seen finalizing his decision with the other All-Stars.
T: Nagano-san?
N: Yes?
T: Have you decided?
N: Yes, this time... It'll be my last.
A somber silence fills the air, the others nodding, having known Nagano's felt he's not been at his best for a while, and has openly stated he doesn't enjoy competing.
S: I understand. Don't worry, I won't make any careless mistakes on the first obstacle for you.
T: Agreed.
K: Let's just both get over that wall this time, how's that sound?
N: Hah, I'd like that. Give it all your best! In what I can only assume is a move done out of respect, the competing All-Stars are given the last four numbers. Takeda, #97, Shingo, #98, Kōji, #99, and for the 15th and final time, Makoto Nagano will be rocking the #100. They'll have a long wait as usual, though... It'll end up being much, much longer than expected. First StageThe renewal seems to have done its job, as only 5 have cleared through the first 92 runs. Yes, 92. The eagle-eyed among you might have spotted that 99 does not come directly after 92, so... What's up? Well, my friend, let me introduce you to an unsung side character in this story: Mother Nature. You see, rain had started sometime after the day turned to night, resulting in two straight notable competitors, namely Kenjis Darvish and Takahashi, slipping off a new obstacle due to not being able to get any traction on it. After the latter's fail, the producers decided that the rainy conditions were unfair and possibly unsafe for the remaining 8 competitors to run in. For the first time ever, SASUKE's First Stage would have a break in the middle of in. All 92 completed runs would count, and the rest would run the next day, in better conditions. After hearing this announcement, the All-Stars seem very relieved, having all experienced a rainy course before and knowing what it's like. S: Phew, okay, I thought I was gonna lose my streak on the wall! Remember those trials? T: Yes, very well. He looks at Nagano, who playfully rolls his eyes and laughs quietly. N: Hey, I cleared on my second attempt, that's what counts. K: The 8th tournament too, I was never a fan of rain after that. I for sure would've cleared. S: Same, I still don't know exactly what happened on the Rope Climb! Before the four can split back up and prepare for the wait through the night, they're approached by Katsumi, Akiyama and Bunpei, wishing them all well, especially Nagano. B: Hey, the delay just gives you extra time to prepare, right? I know I'm meant to be the technique guy, but I know you're studying. You got this. Katsumi: You all do. Hiroshige-san got so close with so much less experience. A: See you back here tomorrow. N: You're all coming back too? B: Of course, wouldn't miss this for anything. I know I can't compete, but hey, support helps. The All-Stars share a group handshake before departing for the night and returning to, thankfully, a clear sky and good conditions for the last eight runs to commence. Of the first six, two of them are successes from Ragivaru "Wreath Man" Anastase and SASUKE 30 finalist Tomohiro Kawaguchi, the former with the fastest time. Accompanied by clears on the prior day from U.S. representative Brent Steffensen, teacher Yusuke Suzuki, parkour instructor Jun Satō in his return from a 6-tournament hiatus, Swedish representative Andre Sihm, and trampolinist Shunsuke Nagasaki, their successes bring the total clear number to 7. As always though, there have been some shocking, brutal, and outright devastating fails. Kazuma Asa, who had previously made it to the Crazy Cliffhanger 4 straight times, failed the same area as the Kenjis, only this time his fail was actually legit, while Hitoshi Kanno, a former finalist and silver medalist in the previous tournament, dislocated his shoulder on top of the Soritatsu Kabe and timed out there. After Kawaguchi's clear, that left just the All-Stars. Takeda was first and while he cleared every new area, he shockingly, for the first and only time ever, failed the Soritatsu Kabe. Yamamoto next became the 11th victim of the trampoline area, keeping the clear total at a paltry 7 and bringing up Kōji Yamada to the start line. He takes a deep breath, looking out to the clear button atop the Lumberjack Climb as Nagano gives him some words of encouragement. N: I've seen you do much harder, don't let the new stuff get in your head. Remember 2007? We both cleared a stage where everything was new. This isn't an issue. T: Yeah, what he said. The firemen share a quick chuckle. then Yamada turns back to face the course and gives a thumbs-up to his family, who as always, are here cheering him on. A VTR is shown of his previous Soritatsu Kabe fail and training, as well as him stating that despite his age, he still feels like he has all the skills he did during his Kanzenseiha six and a half years prior. After the fluff piece finishes, he is introduced by Kengo Komada. The usual cheers from the crowd and other spectators fill the air as the countdown sounds, and Yamada starts his attack on the renewed First Stage. Right away, he's tasked with completing a new first obstacle, though this one is... to put it lightly, easier than the Rolling Hill. The Quad Steps, the first ever obstacle to be put from ANW to SASUKE instead of the other way around. A much simpler version of the old Godantobi, it's only taken out the lesser skilled competitors today, and poses no trouble for Yamada. After the simple steps, Yamada then transfers directly to the Rolling Hill, a move that is actually somewhat precise and will later take out strong competitors like Urushihara and Ryo. He climbs up the rollers and starts a steady ascent down, getting to the second roller before turning around and jumping safely to the mat. The camera then cuts to the other All-Stars nodding and clapping, expressing concern for the next new obstacle however. Gone is the Log Grip, which hasn't been difficult for any strong competitor since, like, ever, in is the... TIE Fighter. I am not joking. In what I have to assume was some sort of promotion collab type thing, TBS went out and got the naming license to the Star Wars vehicle (please don't destroy me if that's not what you're supposed to call it, I've never watched Star Wars ) for their new obstacle. The concept is simple, one must place their hands and feet on two panels, similar to the Spider Walk, and ride the obstacle as it goes down a track. The difficulty comes from the 30cm drop, which has caused many people to slip, and once that slip happens, it's almost impossible to recover. This, unsurprisingly, is the obstacle Darvish, Takahashi and Asa failed, along with a bunch of lesser-known but still decent competitors, including Black Tiger Shinji Matsubara. After briefly propping his hands up to test the panels, Yamada gets into position and begins his descent. He stays locked in even through the drop, surviving the second new obstacle. The Orugoru awaits, and it comes with a modification that prevents competitors from simply crawling across the top of it. Despite this, Yamada goes into it without much hesitation, slowly but surely making his way across and lowering his body down for the dismount, dropping to safe ground with about 70 seconds to go. The third and final new area here is called the Double Pendulum, named as such because it requires a jump from a mini-tramp to a trapeze that competitors swing from in the motion of a pendulum, before transferring to, well... an actual pendulum. Given Yamada's history with trampoline obstacles, having failed them all except the Jump Hang Kai, (don't talk to me about the Circle Slider and Giant Swing, a springboard is not a trampoline) the All-Stars are understandably nervous. Yamada is too, given that he just had to watch Shingo fail here. He takes a moment to gauge his run-up, leaping out into the air and thankfully grabbing the trapeze with both hands. The camera cuts to the All-Stars again, who clap and yell advice to Yamada. N: Straighten your arms! S: Use your legs to swing too! The advice gets through to Yamada as he lets his arms drop to a straight angle instead of having them locked at 90 degrees, allowing for more swing. Despite this, when Yamada comes back around for a second swing, he elects not to transfer, fearing that he'll make a mistake like Shingo or Urushihara did. His third swing gets him plenty of distance and he successfully locks his arms and legs around the sandbag, dropping down and charging directly into the Tackle. Ah. Right. The Tackle. Yes, after it effectively timed out four straight competitors to end SASUKE 31's First Stage, it got a buff. Not just a minor one either. The three boxes, which weighed 140, 160 and 180kg respectively, are now 240, 300, and 320kg for a total of 860kg, or 1,894lb. That has nearly doubled the weight of the previous version. Unsurprisingly, this has contributed to a fair few timeouts, the most notable ones coming from Hiroshige Yamamoto and Ryo, the latter of which struggled on this new Tackle more than anyone before or since. Yamada lets out a small shout as he crashes into the first box, pushing it along until it collides with box number two. He keeps going, like a train climbing a steep hill, even after hitting the third and final box. He's noticeably slowed, but he still makes steady progress until he crosses the black and yellow line, allowing him to climb up to challenge the obstacle that took him and so many others out last time, the Soritatsu Kabe. At this point, time is a huge factor as Shingo lets Yamada know, yelling "30!" from the sideline. Kōji spurs his usual strategy of running slightly up and down the wall to gain momentum, instead going straight for the top... and coming up short. Nagano grimaces as Yamada regroups, deciding now to go back to what's worked. He runs up slightly, goes back down the wall as the clock ticks down under 20, then charges full steam ahead into his last chance... As his right hand reaches up, he's just barely able to hook onto the top, his left hand following shortly after as a loud mix of "Hayaku!"s come from the crowd and a triumphant "Soritatsu Kabe itta!" comes from the booth. Only the Tarzan Rope and Lumberjack Climb are left, but the clock mercilessly runs. Simply pulling himself atop the Soritatsu Kabe and climbing down to the Tarzan Rope tick off six precious seconds, leaving just 12 left as Yamada grabs the rope, unhooking it as fast as he can and swinging across the pit to the Lumberjack Climb as the klaxon starts to blare. Only 7 seconds remain once Yamada gets his hands on the Lumberjack Climb, and with the All-Stars and his family yelling and the klaxon going off multiple times, he brings out every last bit of energy his tired, 42-year-old legs can muster. He frantically pulls himself up as if he was climbing buildings back in Gifu, but time keeps ticking down. 3... 2... 1... ............. Gunshot. Just as Yamada could see the buzzer, time runs out and brings a heartbreaking end to his valiant run. As the camera pans to the All-Stars, Yamada's family, and every celebrity within a 15-mile radius for their reactions, (which are all just some variation of a scream, disappointed groan, or "Nande?" in case you were wondering) Yamada slowly pulls himself up and walks to the buzzer, collapsing next to the yellow gates. He mutters to himself about his extra swing on the Double Pendulum, which might have made the difference. After he slides down the pole, his family comes over to cheer him up and tell him that he still did a great job, while Nagano can only shrug off yet another All-Star defeat and prepare for his own run. He's interviewed shortly after, stating that he still knows he can clear if he trains well enough and wishing Nagano well. The two exchange words as Yamada makes his way back to the start line, where the king of SASUKE stands.
K: Nagano-san?
N: Yes?
K: The obstacles you know you can do, just do them. Hesitation got me, you can't take too much time. Trust your skills.
N: Always have. I've got this. I've prepared.
K: Alright, good luck.
N: Thank you.
The two bow to each other, then Nagano is spoken to by the other All-Stars, given the ceremonial backslap, introduced by Kengo, and begins his 26th attempt at the course he's dominated for over a decade.
Aftermath
Deja vu. You may have heard of it before. It's a feeling that, at least from my experience, makes you wonder if your dreams are real. And it, right now, is exactly what the All-Stars are feeling.
Yes, dear reader, the Lumberjack Climb has done it again. In fact, not only did Nagano time out there, also thanks to two Soritatsu Kabe attempts, but he was even closer to Yamada, getting his entire body on the final runway before time hit zero. Somehow, this First Stage topped SASUKE 31's for a tragic ending. Four of the sport's greatest athletes all denied by the First Stage for a second straight time, the latter two coming gut-wrenchingly close while the former two failed on areas that they rarely if ever struggled with, with Takeda never having failed the Soritatsu Kabe before [yeah yeah, 19, he still technically beat it though] and Shingo only having failed a trampoline area twice in the past.
Nonetheless, a fitting end to Nagano's career. It wouldn't have been befitting of a champion like him to end his SASUKE days in the water. It's better that he stands atop his territory.
After the speech that I sadly can not delve into without breaking the purpose of this timeline, the 7 remaining challengers would then take on the renewed Second Stage, which they- ...all cleared. All of them. Only Nagasaki even came close to timing out, and honestly, the stage really isn't even worth getting into describing. It just, for lack of a better word, sucked, and thanks to the editing, it was over in 5 minutes anyway.
The Third Stage, however, was a completely different story. Several changes were made, with the Flying Bar returning as 3.2, the Sidewinder being modified, the Crazy Cliffhanger becoming the Ultra Crazy Cliffhanger and adding a second 180 jump, the Vertical Limit having a third ledge, and said VL being connected to the Cliffhanger with no rest. It looked like there might be potential early on, as Steffensen, the leadoff man, made it all the way to the UCCH's first jump, and after Suzuki failed the Flying Bar, Jun Sato failed at the exact same point as Steffensen.
However, from that point forward, the Third Stage bared its fangs. Sihm became the first man to ever fail the Sidewinder, while Nagasaki, Ragivaru, and Kawaguchi were all taken out by the new, improved, suddenly deadly Flying Bar. This made SASUKE 32 the fourth straight renewal tournament to end at the Cliffhanger, and leaving the latter three new changes unseen. So, what do you do if you see those results and you're the producers?
Why, you make the Third Stage even harder of course!
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Is it bad that I actually kinda liked this tournament? |
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Post by coachnoah24 on Nov 15, 2024 10:54:43 GMT -5
Read through this all of yesterday and I really wanted to say that this is absolutely phenomenal. I gotta see how the 2 20th anniversary tournament play out. Keep up the great work!!
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Post by YourResidentKojiFan on Nov 15, 2024 15:16:44 GMT -5
Read through this all of yesterday and I really wanted to say that this is absolutely phenomenal. I gotta see how the 2 20th anniversary tournament play out. Keep up the great work!! Thank you, I appreciate the support! I'll work on 33 and 34, may take longer than the older tournaments as A: I put a lot more detail and effort into them and B: I'm older now and got work and stuff interfering half the time. Will definitely get them up as soon as I can though! |
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